Anonymous wrote:He just was joking that you were the kid staying with her parents. You’re way too sensitive, letting it ruin your day, posting online for advice. How to navigate? Please. Laugh it off and move on. You’re obviously insecure since you mentioned not thinking you’ve behaved immaturely.

Op, your BIL has entered the chat. ^

I think the above is the best comment

Anonymous wrote:I always deadpan and ask: “What do you mean by that?” when someones makes a shi$$y “joke” like that.

Always this. Always. ‘I don’t get it. What do you mean.’ They let the silence hang. If they don’t answer, ask again.

Anyone else at the table comment? I would calmly ask "Interesting. Everyone else feeling the same way as BIL?"

He just was joking that you were the kid staying with her parents. You’re way too sensitive, letting it ruin your day, posting online for advice. How to navigate? Please. Laugh it off and move on. You’re obviously insecure since you mentioned not thinking you’ve behaved immaturely.

If this guy can dish it out, he needs to learn how to take it too. You have my permission to say, “You didn’t seem to have a problem accepting $$ from your in-laws for your house down payment and for X, but you want to pick on ME for splitting a hotel room cost with my parents?” He is an insecure bully and needs his balls handed to him on a platter. Wonder how he treats his wife…

jealous jealous jealous, don’t think twice about a loser

Since the situation passed, I would not bring it up now (although I completely understand why it annoyed). If it happens again, I would respond in the moment with something like the previous poster suggested. Is he generally an a**?

Yeah, I feel like if I did reply in a more aggressive way, then it sort of shows that I am insecure about my role in family (which I am, but I wouldn't want to bring attention to it). To be fair, I did live with my parents for 6 months while I worked from home last year. He did make a joke then that my parents should claim me as a dependent for taxes. I could at least somewhat see the humor in that "joke", but the kids menu one just seemed like his brain has this "joke" that he wants to continue.

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn’t say anything, he’s probably well aware you make more than him and jealous.

Yup a jealous insecure manlet. Honestly your sister ( or brother) should tell him to STFU

And the only reason I would not say anything is because I think he’s the type who would get satisfaction!

OP - I didn't laugh, but it caught me off guard.

I wouldn’t say anything, he’s probably well aware you make more than him and jealous.

I always deadpan and ask: “What do you mean by that?” when someones makes a shi$$y “joke” like that.

I'm the only single person (40) of a family - youngest of 5 siblings. I do have a job as an attorney. I don't believe I have ever acted in an immature way in front of him to justify sort of this loser narrative. On the most recent family trip, each sibling had a family unit. I stayed with my parents and split the hotel with them. At breakfast, we are all sitting together at breakfast and I opened the menu, and my brother in law "jokes" - "No, shouldn't you be ordering from the kids menu?" or something to that effect. The comment really frustrated me, as it soured the rest of my day and I don't think is actually even a funny joke to begin with. Meanwhile my family has actually helped his family unit out quite a lot in their life with down deposits, money assistance, etc., yet he's making me have the narrative of the immature child. Sort of venting here but wanted to see how you'd navigate it.