Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you give your DH a second chance? There was a recently a video which went viral about a firefighter who exposed his charging wife during his 40th birthday celebration. He recently filed for divorce. I would have done the same and many men I know would have done the same as well.

But why do women sometimes desperately try to keep a cheating spouse? If my wife cheats she is gone. We will share custody and be civil about it. We will sell our homes and buy new ones. We will continue savings for college etc. I just don't understand why do women feel the need to fight for a cheater.

You’re citing one example. Men stay too.

Anonymous wrote:I did. He cheated while I was pregnant/postpartum.

Honestly the three years or so after that I was so depressed I could barely function. I was a zombie and just did my best to go to work and take care of the kids. There was absolutely no way I had the capacity for a divorce, moving out, etc.

After those 3 years I just stopped caring about marriage entirely. What am I gonna do even if we split? I don’t want another man. I don’t want to get married ever again. So I stayed together because it’s just easier with the kids.

But now I basically live my own life. I don’t care if he cheats again. I put myself first, and once the kids are out of the house, I plan to have a silent divorce where I just go do whatever I want.

We still have a relationship. We still have sex, go on dates, have fun, and try to set an example for the kids. I don’t think he’s cheated ever again, he freaked out after he saw how depressed I was and did a ton of therapy.

I don’t know if that makes sense. It’s almost like, if we had divorced, I would have had boyfriends for fun and companionship, but they would have never been a top priority. Since that’s what I would have done, I just did that with my H instead. We have fun, but there’s not a lot of emotion on my end and I don’t prioritize him.

I also flirt a LOT with other men. I know people will say two wrong don’t make a right, but it actually does help me a lot.

Anonymous wrote:Most women have terribly low self esteem and a high need to fit in socially which means having a husband for so many woman having a man is paramount doesn't matter how he treats her.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you give your DH a second chance? There was a recently a video which went viral about a firefighter who exposed his charging wife during his 40th birthday celebration. He recently filed for divorce. I would have done the same and many men I know would have done the same as well.

But why do women sometimes desperately try to keep a cheating spouse? If my wife cheats she is gone. We will share custody and be civil about it. We will sell our homes and buy new ones. We will continue savings for college etc. I just don't understand why do women feel the need to fight for a cheater.

You’re citing one example. Men stay too.

Anonymous wrote:Why do you give your DH a second chance? There was a recently a video which went viral about a firefighter who exposed his charging wife during his 40th birthday celebration. He recently filed for divorce. I would have done the same and many men I know would have done the same as well.

But why do women sometimes desperately try to keep a cheating spouse? If my wife cheats she is gone. We will share custody and be civil about it. We will sell our homes and buy new ones. We will continue savings for college etc. I just don't understand why do women feel the need to fight for a cheater.

Anonymous wrote:I did. He cheated while I was pregnant/postpartum.

Honestly the three years or so after that I was so depressed I could barely function. I was a zombie and just did my best to go to work and take care of the kids. There was absolutely no way I had the capacity for a divorce, moving out, etc.

After those 3 years I just stopped caring about marriage entirely. What am I gonna do even if we split? I don’t want another man. I don’t want to get married ever again. So I stayed together because it’s just easier with the kids.

But now I basically live my own life. I don’t care if he cheats again. I put myself first, and once the kids are out of the house, I plan to have a silent divorce where I just go do whatever I want.

We still have a relationship. We still have sex, go on dates, have fun, and try to set an example for the kids. I don’t think he’s cheated ever again, he freaked out after he saw how depressed I was and did a ton of therapy.

I don’t know if that makes sense. It’s almost like, if we had divorced, I would have had boyfriends for fun and companionship, but they would have never been a top priority. Since that’s what I would have done, I just did that with my H instead. We have fun, but there’s not a lot of emotion on my end and I don’t prioritize him.

I also flirt a LOT with other men. I know people will say two wrong don’t make a right, but it actually does help me a lot.

Anonymous wrote:You're stupid, OP, if you forget that women are by and large not the breadwinners in their households, and must therefore make certain compromises in order to keep a lifestyle they may be used to. Equally important, women are more likely than men to care about the psychological wellbeing of their children, and work to ensure that they grow up in a stable household with both parents.

We are still in a patriarchy.

Anonymous wrote:Why do you give your DH a second chance? There was a recently a video which went viral about a firefighter who exposed his charging wife during his 40th birthday celebration. He recently filed for divorce. I would have done the same and many men I know would have done the same as well.

But why do women sometimes desperately try to keep a cheating spouse? If my wife cheats she is gone. We will share custody and be civil about it. We will sell our homes and buy new ones. We will continue savings for college etc. I just don't understand why do women feel the need to fight for a cheater.