Anonymous wrote:No. My son didn’t specialize until 8th grade and didn’t make the high school team in his favorite sport.

+1

Same but my DD.

Anonymous wrote:Thanks, all. I am trying not to have specific goals for my kid. They are athletic and were good at everything in early to mid-elementary school, but now they're getting passed up in all of their sports by kids who have specialized, and it is demoralizing. And sports overlap, so we're constantly letting one coach or team down. They don't have a favorite - they look forward to the season changes. I'm afraid they won't even make the high school team in lacrosse, for example, if they don't play it more than a few months a year.

Don’t forget the puberty factor as well (which starts to come into play at this age). Some of the performance differences can be related to puberty/physical maturity and that will be the case until boys are 15-16ish years old. Also- eventual physical size/build. Sometimes kids start filtering in or out (or switching focus) around this age based on their physical attributes. For example a very tall boy focusing more on basketball and dropping baseball, or a shorter boy putting basketball on the back burner and focusing more on wrestling or whatever.

Highly depends what high school he will be attending, and which sports he plays. At many large high schools, it is nearly impossible to even make the JV teams without heavy travel/club experience and/or extensive private lessons. At other high schools (often smaller high schools) nearly anyone can make JV. Also depends on the popularity of the particular sport and the size of the teams.

Thanks, all. I am trying not to have specific goals for my kid. They are athletic and were good at everything in early to mid-elementary school, but now they're getting passed up in all of their sports by kids who have specialized, and it is demoralizing. And sports overlap, so we're constantly letting one coach or team down. They don't have a favorite - they look forward to the season changes. I'm afraid they won't even make the high school team in lacrosse, for example, if they don't play it more than a few months a year.

The way sports are set up, especially in this area, it can be hard to be competitive in three different sport through high school. Largely because of the prevalence of club sports and off season training.

However, that doesn't mean you should ditch other sports. Your kids might each have a main sport in which they play club and attend off season clinics or training. BUT they can of course participate in other sports as a form of cross training (or just for fun! remember fun?) in the off season.

There are lots of less competitive ways to train in another sport or discipline. You can play rec sports. You can do summer swim. You can do a class or session based activity like yoga or rock climbing. Dance can also be a great complement to other sports, building balance and coordination while also engaging in activity that is fun and cooperative (lots of way to do dance without being on a competitive dance team). Dance also has an artistic component that can be great for kids.

There are also kids who can play two sports competitively if the schedules are complementary. A fall/winter sport like volleyball or basketball and a spring/summer sport like tennis, for instance. There really are still kids who make this work. But also it might be a lot for a kid and they might want a true off season where they don't have to stick to a strict practice and game schedule, in which case a more casual activity might make more sense.

TL;DR: I think you and your husband are both being too rigid. Cross training is truly valuable physically/competitively and also allows kids to explore and do things for fun. But you also have to be realistic about the time commitment for being truly competitive in a sport and recognize that you only have so much control over the culture of the sport where you live. Like if your kid is very committed to swimming, the truth is that in this area that's a year round sport if you want to be competitive, and the practice and meet schedules are not very accommodating of other sports, and that's just the reality.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s your goal?

To reach their potential in sport.

What does that look like to you?

No. My son didn’t specialize until 8th grade and didn’t make the high school team in his favorite sport.

It's unhealthy to play the same sport all year round. It's not good for overuse injuries, etc. Better to use different muscles etc playing different sports.

Personally, I am letting my kid decide, except I refuse to drive for travel sports. He can play for his school teams. That's fine.

Anonymous wrote:DH and I grew up in smaller towns where a good athlete could play three varsity sports in high school. DH believes the data supports playing multiple sports for as long as possible, and kids shouldn't have to specialize before college. Does that still work? Our tween is good at several sports, but not great at any of them. I think it's because they aren't putting in the same reps as other kids who have specialized.

Work in what sense? That they had fun?

I think it's better for their physical and mental health to play more than one sport (unless they are really drawn to just one). But agree with others, if they want to be the best at something they probably have to specialize.

What do they want? Are they happy doing sports over different seasons, or do they wish they could play more/be better at a certain sport? This area in particular is ripe for "travel sports-itis", where no one feels like rec is good enough and everyone does private lessons. But if your kid loves playing basketball in the winter and soccer in the spring and bball in the fall, that's great! As a nice benefit it seems to be much better for their bodies not to specialize-- less likely to get injured by diversifying.

That said...depending on where you are and what sports, those are not the kids who make varsity. At our high school it would be very rare for a kid who doesn't play travel to make even JV in any of those sports.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s your goal?

To reach their potential in sport.

That's too wishy-washy. If you don't care at all about college recruitment, then play three sports.

Some incredible athletes like Patrick Mahomes could have gone pro in either football or baseball...most professional or even college athletes had to specialize.

I don't think you will ever hear of a top professional soccer player ever seriously playing another sport.

The Dominican Republic has the most per capita players in the MLB, and those kids don't do anything else.

Anonymous wrote:What’s your goal?

To reach their potential in sport.

What’s your goal?

DH and I grew up in smaller towns where a good athlete could play three varsity sports in high school. DH believes the data supports playing multiple sports for as long as possible, and kids shouldn't have to specialize before college. Does that still work? Our tween is good at several sports, but not great at any of them. I think it's because they aren't putting in the same reps as other kids who have specialized.