51 is not even that old. And if you're at practices nonstop- walk the track while the kids practice. That's what all the moms are doing. I like to listen to audio books while I do so.

Definitely agree on skincare, clothes, hair cut. Do you have a wife or a female friend who could advise?

220k is a pretty high salary. A TON of feds were just laid off in this area and their salaries are more like 100-160k, so you have a lot of competition for wages. They likely have the same skills or degrees too.

IDK what you did to yourself. At 51 I was young, hip, cool and trendy. 51 is like the equivalent of 30 today.

Look at this list of famous 51 year old people. Just look like them and you will be fine.

https://www.thefamouspeople.com/51-year.php

Anonymous wrote:Invest in a good haircut and well fitting business clothes. Look into a personal shopper/and or tailor. We’ve had good luck with Nordstroms. If you present yourself well people will want to hire you.

This - it's amazing the difference a good haircut and wardrobe makes.

- frumpy old mom

Dress well, be well groomed, lose any facial hair, speak well, and practice interviewing to make sure you're speaking fluently and convincingly while seeming approachable and congenial.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need fancy hair cut and color (highlight mixed with lowlights etc), skincare, exercise (not for the weight but for the mood and confidence). A lot of hiring managers are young now, you need to be able to get on with their sense of humor.

I'm not sure I can color my hair; I have allergies and skin sensitives -- it’s very likely to give me a rash. Should I do a crew cut rather than a longer hair style? shave bald which gives sense of mystery... but bald frumpy white guy seems worse!!

I am allergic to hair dye and have very sensitive skin (prone to rashes).

This only works on light brown, brown, or darker hair and the process is somewhat arduous (much easier for people with short hair I’d imagine), but results can be amazing and it is very natural-looking:

https://www.myhairprint.com/pages/hairprint-men

Good luck, OP!

Anonymous wrote:You need fancy hair cut and color (highlight mixed with lowlights etc), skincare, exercise (not for the weight but for the mood and confidence). A lot of hiring managers are young now, you need to be able to get on with their sense of humor.

Curious about sense of humor, is there homework for that?!

I was pretty dang confident until this round of interviews, but will keep up exercise.

I'm not sure I can color my hair; I have allergies and skin sensitives -- its very likely to give me a rash. Should I do a crew cut rather than a longer hair style? shave bald which gives sense of mystery... but bald frumpy white guy seems worse!!

My facial skin is actually pretty good, because of the treatment for my skin issues it gives me a glow almost, so I got that.

You need fancy hair cut and color (highlight mixed with lowlights etc), skincare, exercise (not for the weight but for the mood and confidence). A lot of hiring managers are young now, you need to be able to get on with their sense of humor.

Your goal is to look young, on paper and in person. Ageism is real and a huge issue in hiring. On your resume, remove the year you graduated college; remove early roles in the 1990s. Try to sound young. Get a makeover; wear modern clothes. Cut your hair short. Remove any facial hair. This sucks but it is reality.

Anonymous wrote:I think you are underestimating yourself big time. It’s great that you are getting healthy (you need to be there for your kids in the long run) but body shape has little to do with hiring. Tons of ceos are overweight look at trump and pritzker. Go get a fancy haircut and maybe dye to look a bit fresher. Also stem technical knowledge is always valuable. I would do some relevant certifications courses in your free time while you are looking mostly just to keep you sharp and expand your networking.

But I’m responding to another thread where they say don’t look grumpy etc, and I look in the mirror and realize why interviews aren’t closing. In prior years, I ALWAYS got an offer for every interview. This sudden reversal of trend is troubling and that’s why I am worried about this aspect of being older.

Anonymous wrote:I think you are underestimating yourself big time. It’s great that you are getting healthy (you need to be there for your kids in the long run) but body shape has little to do with hiring. Tons of ceos are overweight look at trump and pritzker. Go get a fancy haircut and maybe dye to look a bit fresher. Also stem technical knowledge is always valuable. I would do some relevant certifications courses in your free time while you are looking mostly just to keep you sharp and expand your networking.

I mean you chose two examples with wealthy fathers to kick start their career! I went to college on a Pell grant!

Invest in a good haircut and well fitting business clothes. Look into a personal shopper/and or tailor. We’ve had good luck with Nordstroms. If you present yourself well people will want to hire you.

I think you are underestimating yourself big time. It’s great that you are getting healthy (you need to be there for your kids in the long run) but body shape has little to do with hiring. Tons of ceos are overweight look at trump and pritzker. Go get a fancy haircut and maybe dye to look a bit fresher. Also stem technical knowledge is always valuable. I would do some relevant certifications courses in your free time while you are looking mostly just to keep you sharp and expand your networking.

Just encouragement. If you're getting dozens of interviews in this market, you're competitive. Keep at it. Try to stay confident.

For now, focus on supporting your family by cooking, cleaning, yard work, saving as much money as possible by doing things yourself. Continue to look for jobs and work on teacher job. You will likely have to move, possibly to cheaper area in another state that pays teachers high salary, or write lesson plans for cyber schools remotely. There are no guarantees, could be early retirement.

My contract was killed and I’ve been laid off by my contracting company. I’m somewhat technical, having worked in computational aspects of environmental field, but the demand is not there for my specific experience.

I’m 51 years old, short and overweight, grey hair — I’m very much the dorky dad, and partly overweight because we are working parents of 3 boys and my typical schedule is arrive home at 7, scarf some food down from whatever is leftover or frozen and run a kid off to practice or help with homework. So little time to exercise or make a healthy meal for myself.

Well, until now — so now I’m hitting the gym and eating way better (no snacking at the office!), but it’s not going transform me into a dashing captain of industry over night, and being short seems to be especially bad these days (judging from the short boss thread). When I was younger I definitely didn’t feel it was quite as much a handicap, I think everyone posting their height on OLD result brought it into the zeitgeist?

I made $220k at last job and would like to come close to that. I’ve interviewed for dozens of jobs but no offers and I am pretty sure my dad vibes and lack of executive presence is killing me for senior roles. Considering becoming a science teacher but that will be a huge step down income. It will likely mean we have to move eventually once emergency fund runs out.

Any one BTDT? I hear about the fit executives jumping back in no problem, but not sure what is out there for us down the totem poll.