Anonymous
05/12/2025 14:18
Subject: For people with 2E kids how do their issues manifest or are they neurotypical presenting
^ oh and my son has no friends. Zero. Which is a problem.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 14:16
Subject: For people with 2E kids how do their issues manifest or are they neurotypical presenting
It depends how impacted they are, OP.
My son has a high IQ with autism, severe inattentive ADHD, anxiety, insomnia, learning disabilities and physical issues stemming from a micro-premature birth. He needed physical, feeding and occupational therapy as an infant and toddler, and years of speech therapy and gymnastics work. He couldn't function in the classroom without an aide in elementary school and had an IEP until 11th grade.
With much work on his part, Adderall, teaching him social understanding, and constant executive function coaching, he was able to become a stellar student and is now doing well in college. But we needed to recenter the family's life around his needs. He was in the GT/LD program in MCPS.
My other kid has a higher IQ than he does and milder ADHD and anxiety. She's been a dream to parent, is several grades ahead in math, and is in all advanced courses without ever needing outside help from anyone, plus is a competent hose back rider, wins music competitions in her instrument, writes stories and draws as a hobby. She's "technically" 2E... but not what I would call functionally 2E. She just presents as gifted.
My son has a high IQ with autism, severe inattentive ADHD, anxiety, insomnia, learning disabilities and physical issues stemming from a micro-premature birth. He needed physical, feeding and occupational therapy as an infant and toddler, and years of speech therapy and gymnastics work. He couldn't function in the classroom without an aide in elementary school and had an IEP until 11th grade.
With much work on his part, Adderall, teaching him social understanding, and constant executive function coaching, he was able to become a stellar student and is now doing well in college. But we needed to recenter the family's life around his needs. He was in the GT/LD program in MCPS.
My other kid has a higher IQ than he does and milder ADHD and anxiety. She's been a dream to parent, is several grades ahead in math, and is in all advanced courses without ever needing outside help from anyone, plus is a competent hose back rider, wins music competitions in her instrument, writes stories and draws as a hobby. She's "technically" 2E... but not what I would call functionally 2E. She just presents as gifted.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 13:49
Subject: For people with 2E kids how do their issues manifest or are they neurotypical presenting
What is the difference between 2E and someone who is on or above grade level but needs a lot of support with EF and social interactions?
Why GTLD versus connections? (MCPS)
Why GTLD versus connections? (MCPS)
Anonymous
05/12/2025 13:41
Subject: For people with 2E kids how do their issues manifest or are they neurotypical presenting
Anonymous wrote:Anxious, introverted, poor EF, less socially typical as kid gets older. Very knowledgeable about areas of interest, and sophisticated in thinking, but time management issues make getting good grades hard. Tend to form relationships based on shared interests.
Same for my son
Anonymous
05/12/2025 13:00
Subject: For people with 2E kids how do their issues manifest or are they neurotypical presenting
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:My two 2Es both have ADHD, one inattentive, one combined type.
Their ADHD was not diagnosed until HS, mostly because the giftedness helped cover for it until the academic demands ramped up. Also, both did not have social problems, they always had tight groups of friends and, in fact, now in college are still close friends with kids they've known since elementary school.
Early signs --
Combined type kid: very impulsive, couldn't wait to be called on in class, makes careless mistakes in homework, lying about dumb stuff, hated school, later told us he always felt like the "bad kid" in school. We did discuss ADHD with the ES counselor in 3rd grade but she advised that the impulse control was that he was young for grade (not-redshrited-summer birthday). Evaluated in 9th grade when he started failing classes. I really regret believing the school counselor.
Inattentive kid: Always got good grades but major procrastinator, hyperfocus on things like drawing/painting would distract from homework. Or she'd turn a small homework assignment into a major art project. Had a ton of anxiety about school in MS that wasn't obvious to us. Room was always a disaster. ADHD diagnosed in 9th grade when we initially had her evaluated for anxiety. Her ADHD looked very different than DS's.
Also, both did not want to do organized activities after school. School exhausted them. Extrovert DS just wanted to play with friends while introvert DD liked to be with 1-2 friends and/or draw to recharge.
I just got an ADHD dx for a very similar sounding 8th grader. School has been easy for her so far (social not so much, but she is also introverted and feels accepted at school even if she does not have a big friend group). I am also waiting on an anxiety dx (I think that is an even bigger issue for her.) I don't think she needs an IEP or 504 at this time but I'm wondering what type of supports or interventions or just parenting strategies have been helpful upon getting a diagnosis, and how those may have changed with increased demands in HS.
Medication has been somewhat helpful (although not as helpful as it was for my DS) plus executive function coaching. The main thing school offered was additional time but that is a double-edged sword since she has a strong tendency to procrastinate and let things pile up without a firm deadline. Her 504 was later adjusted to a more specific few days grace period for late work. Wearing noise-cancelling headphones most of the day (except during lectures) was also helpful to screen out the school chaos. She's in college now, still on medication and using an executive function coach provided by the college.
For parenting, I think it helped to give her permission to tone down the academic schedule. That it was OK to not take as many APs as her friends, to step down a level in math. Early on, she had a clear academic/career interest so I showed her colleges with strong programs for that which didn't require HS perfection to be admitted and that seemed to help bring down the stress. For chores and things like cleaning her room we had a visual system with cards to remind her of each thing that had to be done. Encourage use of timers and calendar reminders.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 11:27
Subject: For people with 2E kids how do their issues manifest or are they neurotypical presenting
^ Similar to your inattentive kid
Anonymous
05/12/2025 11:27
Subject: For people with 2E kids how do their issues manifest or are they neurotypical presenting
Anonymous wrote:My two 2Es both have ADHD, one inattentive, one combined type.
Their ADHD was not diagnosed until HS, mostly because the giftedness helped cover for it until the academic demands ramped up. Also, both did not have social problems, they always had tight groups of friends and, in fact, now in college are still close friends with kids they've known since elementary school.
Early signs --
Combined type kid: very impulsive, couldn't wait to be called on in class, makes careless mistakes in homework, lying about dumb stuff, hated school, later told us he always felt like the "bad kid" in school. We did discuss ADHD with the ES counselor in 3rd grade but she advised that the impulse control was that he was young for grade (not-redshrited-summer birthday). Evaluated in 9th grade when he started failing classes. I really regret believing the school counselor.
Inattentive kid: Always got good grades but major procrastinator, hyperfocus on things like drawing/painting would distract from homework. Or she'd turn a small homework assignment into a major art project. Had a ton of anxiety about school in MS that wasn't obvious to us. Room was always a disaster. ADHD diagnosed in 9th grade when we initially had her evaluated for anxiety. Her ADHD looked very different than DS's.
Also, both did not want to do organized activities after school. School exhausted them. Extrovert DS just wanted to play with friends while introvert DD liked to be with 1-2 friends and/or draw to recharge.
I just got an ADHD dx for a very similar sounding 8th grader. School has been easy for her so far (social not so much, but she is also introverted and feels accepted at school even if she does not have a big friend group). I am also waiting on an anxiety dx (I think that is an even bigger issue for her.) I don't think she needs an IEP or 504 at this time but I'm wondering what type of supports or interventions or just parenting strategies have been helpful upon getting a diagnosis, and how those may have changed with increased demands in HS.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 10:48
Subject: For people with 2E kids how do their issues manifest or are they neurotypical presenting
Even for NT kids the a-hah moment when you realize you aren't the best, have to actually study and put in more effort is traumatic. At MIT everyone expected to be above class average. Think about that.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 10:35
Subject: For people with 2E kids how do their issues manifest or are they neurotypical presenting
My two 2Es both have ADHD, one inattentive, one combined type.
Their ADHD was not diagnosed until HS, mostly because the giftedness helped cover for it until the academic demands ramped up. Also, both did not have social problems, they always had tight groups of friends and, in fact, now in college are still close friends with kids they've known since elementary school.
Early signs --
Combined type kid: very impulsive, couldn't wait to be called on in class, makes careless mistakes in homework, lying about dumb stuff, hated school, later told us he always felt like the "bad kid" in school. We did discuss ADHD with the ES counselor in 3rd grade but she advised that the impulse control was that he was young for grade (not-redshrited-summer birthday). Evaluated in 9th grade when he started failing classes. I really regret believing the school counselor.
Inattentive kid: Always got good grades but major procrastinator, hyperfocus on things like drawing/painting would distract from homework. Or she'd turn a small homework assignment into a major art project. Had a ton of anxiety about school in MS that wasn't obvious to us. Room was always a disaster. ADHD diagnosed in 9th grade when we initially had her evaluated for anxiety. Her ADHD looked very different than DS's.
Also, both did not want to do organized activities after school. School exhausted them. Extrovert DS just wanted to play with friends while introvert DD liked to be with 1-2 friends and/or draw to recharge.
Their ADHD was not diagnosed until HS, mostly because the giftedness helped cover for it until the academic demands ramped up. Also, both did not have social problems, they always had tight groups of friends and, in fact, now in college are still close friends with kids they've known since elementary school.
Early signs --
Combined type kid: very impulsive, couldn't wait to be called on in class, makes careless mistakes in homework, lying about dumb stuff, hated school, later told us he always felt like the "bad kid" in school. We did discuss ADHD with the ES counselor in 3rd grade but she advised that the impulse control was that he was young for grade (not-redshrited-summer birthday). Evaluated in 9th grade when he started failing classes. I really regret believing the school counselor.
Inattentive kid: Always got good grades but major procrastinator, hyperfocus on things like drawing/painting would distract from homework. Or she'd turn a small homework assignment into a major art project. Had a ton of anxiety about school in MS that wasn't obvious to us. Room was always a disaster. ADHD diagnosed in 9th grade when we initially had her evaluated for anxiety. Her ADHD looked very different than DS's.
Also, both did not want to do organized activities after school. School exhausted them. Extrovert DS just wanted to play with friends while introvert DD liked to be with 1-2 friends and/or draw to recharge.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 09:23
Subject: For people with 2E kids how do their issues manifest or are they neurotypical presenting
Anonymous wrote:masks at school and in public, star student. Tantrum meltdowns at home most days and lots of bedtime anxiety (can’t fall asleep by himself.) age 9.
This is us. At age 10 he is usually our best sleeper (now, not last year).
Inflexible thinking to absurdity. We’re working on this.
His classmates wrote nice notes for him last week (every classmate gets their day to receive nice notes). He’s “kind, funny, nice, a good friend.” Liked by everyone, but almost zero social life outside of school. Seriously, we’ll be at a school event and everyone will walk by and say “Easton!!!” (Not his name). He’s someone everyone wants to say hi to. But has 1-2 close friends and we never get together with them. They are 2e also, and their parents won’t make much of a connection with me.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 09:18
Subject: For people with 2E kids how do their issues manifest or are they neurotypical presenting
Really, really good in her areas of passion, not able to engage at all if she doesn't find a hook to those areas. That meant that she had either As or Ds (because of missing assignments). Had no friends at school. Her friends were largely adults who shared her niche patterns.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 09:06
Subject: For people with 2E kids how do their issues manifest or are they neurotypical presenting
masks at school and in public, star student. Tantrum meltdowns at home most days and lots of bedtime anxiety (can’t fall asleep by himself.) age 9.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 09:00
Subject: For people with 2E kids how do their issues manifest or are they neurotypical presenting
Anxious, introverted, poor EF, less socially typical as kid gets older. Very knowledgeable about areas of interest, and sophisticated in thinking, but time management issues make getting good grades hard. Tend to form relationships based on shared interests.
Anonymous
05/12/2025 08:57
Subject: For people with 2E kids how do their issues manifest or are they neurotypical presenting
Depends what age and underlying diagnosis.
Boredom at school, not wanting to go to school, declining grades (older) because they stopped caring because it was too boring, social issues, depression, anxiety…
Im a 2e….school academics was a piece of cake, socially it was hard. It wasn’t until the end of high school that I found I had a subject i couldn’t just breeze through without studying. And I got horrible grades in those subjects. I was lucky that “back in the day” I was grouped with 5-10 other high performing kids/2es and we traveled together from grade 3-12. Gifted program and all. Even if we weren’t good friends it was at least people who were reliable and “got it.”
2Es now are struggling. Mcps has not been good for my 2e.
Boredom at school, not wanting to go to school, declining grades (older) because they stopped caring because it was too boring, social issues, depression, anxiety…
Im a 2e….school academics was a piece of cake, socially it was hard. It wasn’t until the end of high school that I found I had a subject i couldn’t just breeze through without studying. And I got horrible grades in those subjects. I was lucky that “back in the day” I was grouped with 5-10 other high performing kids/2es and we traveled together from grade 3-12. Gifted program and all. Even if we weren’t good friends it was at least people who were reliable and “got it.”
2Es now are struggling. Mcps has not been good for my 2e.
Anonymous
05/11/2025 21:58
Subject: For people with 2E kids how do their issues manifest or are they neurotypical presenting
Basically the title.