If you don’t think she’s responsible there is your answer.

I’m an adult child who has been using the beach house alone since college, including with college friends. I’ve never caused any problems but I’m pretty boring and responsible.

Senior week are barely adults. Hard no in less a parent will be there to supervise.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. We have a vacation house at the beach. DD wants to use it with her college friends. They are all 21/22.

My concern is DD is not that responsible. She failed out of college (while living with these friends), and is finally back in school (after two years, and at a lesser school). The friends are graduating, and she wants to take a week after their graduation and hang out at the beach.

One week won’t derail her. But I also feel like this is a privilege that she needs to earn and she’s not there yet.

What would she have to do to earn the privilege? Graduate from college?

And become gainfully employed.

Then woman up and say you can use the house when A and B have been achieved. Use your words.

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. We have a vacation house at the beach. DD wants to use it with her college friends. They are all 21/22.

My concern is DD is not that responsible. She failed out of college (while living with these friends), and is finally back in school (after two years, and at a lesser school). The friends are graduating, and she wants to take a week after their graduation and hang out at the beach.

One week won’t derail her. But I also feel like this is a privilege that she needs to earn and she’s not there yet.

If that means not doing well in school, it's not a good reason. If that means won't care for the house and make good decisions, then that's a good reason to say no.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. We have a vacation house at the beach. DD wants to use it with her college friends. They are all 21/22.

My concern is DD is not that responsible. She failed out of college (while living with these friends), and is finally back in school (after two years, and at a lesser school). The friends are graduating, and she wants to take a week after their graduation and hang out at the beach.

One week won’t derail her. But I also feel like this is a privilege that she needs to earn and she’s not there yet.

What would she have to do to earn the privilege? Graduate from college?

And become gainfully employed.

LOL she’s at a ‘lesser school.”

I feel sorry for your kid.

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. We have a vacation house at the beach. DD wants to use it with her college friends. They are all 21/22.

My concern is DD is not that responsible. She failed out of college (while living with these friends), and is finally back in school (after two years, and at a lesser school). The friends are graduating, and she wants to take a week after their graduation and hang out at the beach.

One week won’t derail her. But I also feel like this is a privilege that she needs to earn and she’s not there yet.

What would she have to do to earn the privilege? Graduate from college?

What adults are doing senior week? Actual senior citizens, maybe. College students don't do a senior week.

Father passed away and left me (only child) a home in Miami..
Our two kids have zero interest in it ..

Honestly I don't either ..

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. We have a vacation house at the beach. DD wants to use it with her college friends. They are all 21/22.

My concern is DD is not that responsible. She failed out of college (while living with these friends), and is finally back in school (after two years, and at a lesser school). The friends are graduating, and she wants to take a week after their graduation and hang out at the beach.

One week won’t derail her. But I also feel like this is a privilege that she needs to earn and she’s not there yet.

Didn't she earn it by going back to school?

This is OP. We have a vacation house at the beach. DD wants to use it with her college friends. They are all 21/22.

My concern is DD is not that responsible. She failed out of college (while living with these friends), and is finally back in school (after two years, and at a lesser school). The friends are graduating, and she wants to take a week after their graduation and hang out at the beach.

One week won’t derail her. But I also feel like this is a privilege that she needs to earn and she’s not there yet.

Family home in Ocean Pines MD. It was my parent's retirement home. They've since passed and my siblings and I own it (we're almost all in our 60s now). Our kids are now in 20-30s.

Surprisingly, no kids wanted to do senior week there. However, they all had college friends hang out there during the summer months. The google calendar is everyone gets to sign up once and then if extra time available it is 1st come 1st serve. Most who are now married don't mind if others show up. Only my one sister and her kids want exclusivity.

There's a list of rules and have never had a problem with kids leaving a mess. It might not always be as clean as I like...but for some of the boys, it's probably the most cleaning they've ever done.

The rules involve washing all the sheets/dishes/towels; cleaning bathrooms/kitchen, vacuuming, take all garbage outside to cans. Also little things like turn off the water heater and main water line. Change the thermostat, make sure things unplugged in the kitchen and ice maker is off, etc.

We do let ours use it.

Senior week? Those are not adult children, so obviously not.


We have sons who can use it. It's in a very popular west coast destination, so not driving distance. Our kids are late teens/early/mid 20s. They are pretty protective of the home, and are not going to invite anyone who doesn't treat it properly. We also have cars there they can use.

They don't throw parties other than the friends they bring. We cap the number of friends based on bedrooms/sleeping space.

If you have a vacation home, do you let your adult children use it (without you)?

If so, how old are they, and how old were they when you started allowing it?

What rules do you have surrounding its use? Can they bring their friends? Throw parties? Host senior week?