Anonymous
04/03/2025 00:38
Subject: If you knew you can only see your adult kids 15 more times before you die, how would you feel?
Anonymous wrote:If you are 60+ and live in another state and meet every year, you are probably going to meet them 15 times, if twice a year than probably 30 more meetups before you die. Even that's not a given. Let that thought sink in. What would you do to make the most of it?
holy god this depressed me more than even current news is
- 60 year old who lives across the coutnry from her kid
Anonymous
04/03/2025 00:14
Subject: If you knew you can only see your adult kids 15 more times before you die, how would you feel?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:My father lives across the country and I assure you that he does not care. He views me as an obligation. If I don't call him, he'll call me once every 2-3 weeks for us to have a stilted conversation mostly about what we are watching or reading. I try to get him to NOT tell me how he did a load of sheets and towels and is going to the grocery store tomorrow after he vacuums.
What kind of conversation you would rather have and why don't you initiate it?
I do my best. He will shut me down if he doesn’t want to talk about something. Plus he will tell people things about me despite knowing I’m a private person, so I can’t talk about anything personal. If I try to talk about interesting research coming out about schizophrenia, he’ll say “that doesn’t matter.” If I try to talk about Jordan Chiles at UCLA, he’ll say it’s a shame I didn’t get in there. Yes, back in 1994. If I ask about the baseball game he went to he will say “you wouldn’t have liked it.” It’s tiring.
I hear you. It must be. Good on you for being patient and kind even though he makes it difficult.
Anonymous
04/02/2025 19:33
Subject: If you knew you can only see your adult kids 15 more times before you die, how would you feel?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:My father lives across the country and I assure you that he does not care. He views me as an obligation. If I don't call him, he'll call me once every 2-3 weeks for us to have a stilted conversation mostly about what we are watching or reading. I try to get him to NOT tell me how he did a load of sheets and towels and is going to the grocery store tomorrow after he vacuums.
What kind of conversation you would rather have and why don't you initiate it?
I do my best. He will shut me down if he doesn’t want to talk about something. Plus he will tell people things about me despite knowing I’m a private person, so I can’t talk about anything personal. If I try to talk about interesting research coming out about schizophrenia, he’ll say “that doesn’t matter.” If I try to talk about Jordan Chiles at UCLA, he’ll say it’s a shame I didn’t get in there. Yes, back in 1994. If I ask about the baseball game he went to he will say “you wouldn’t have liked it.” It’s tiring.
Anonymous
04/02/2025 19:32
Subject: If you knew you can only see your adult kids 15 more times before you die, how would you feel?
Why are you planning to die at 75? My parents lived to 95, and my oldest siblings are in their 70s with no signs of slowing down. And while I did maybe swee them only 1-2x a year when I was in my 20s because I was too poor to buy a lot of plane tickets and didn’t have much vacation. But I saw them more as I got older and had more money and time and would often bring them out for a month or so at a time to help with my kids once I owned a home.
Anonymous
04/02/2025 19:29
Subject: If you knew you can only see your adult kids 15 more times before you die, how would you feel?
Anonymous wrote:My father lives across the country and I assure you that he does not care. He views me as an obligation. If I don't call him, he'll call me once every 2-3 weeks for us to have a stilted conversation mostly about what we are watching or reading. I try to get him to NOT tell me how he did a load of sheets and towels and is going to the grocery store tomorrow after he vacuums.
What kind of conversation you would rather have and why don't you initiate it?
Anonymous
04/02/2025 19:27
Subject: If you knew you can only see your adult kids 15 more times before you die, how would you feel?
Anonymous wrote:Grateful...why can't you go visit them more? Or talk on the phone/facetime, lots of options. I'm happy if they are doing well and having a life of their own and still see me occasionally.
Original post was inspired from an article.
Anonymous
04/02/2025 19:07
Subject: If you knew you can only see your adult kids 15 more times before you die, how would you feel?
Take them on lots of free vacations.
Anonymous
04/02/2025 17:19
Subject: If you knew you can only see your adult kids 15 more times before you die, how would you feel?
What would I do? Go visit more than 2 times a year. Definitely a lot more if/when grandkids are involved.
Anonymous
04/02/2025 17:17
Subject: If you knew you can only see your adult kids 15 more times before you die, how would you feel?
My father lives across the country and I assure you that he does not care. He views me as an obligation. If I don't call him, he'll call me once every 2-3 weeks for us to have a stilted conversation mostly about what we are watching or reading. I try to get him to NOT tell me how he did a load of sheets and towels and is going to the grocery store tomorrow after he vacuums.
Anonymous
04/02/2025 17:16
Subject: If you knew you can only see your adult kids 15 more times before you die, how would you feel?
Grateful...why can't you go visit them more? Or talk on the phone/facetime, lots of options. I'm happy if they are doing well and having a life of their own and still see me occasionally.
Anonymous
04/02/2025 17:15
Subject: If you knew you can only see your adult kids 15 more times before you die, how would you feel?
I would focus more on not being a burden. What if I'm 70 and saw them 2/3 of the times left but then I got alzheimers and that's it. I'm gonzo.
They get to move themselves, move me, babysit my drooling corpse.
I would make arrangements even more realistic than yours.
They get to move themselves, move me, babysit my drooling corpse.
I would make arrangements even more realistic than yours.
Anonymous
04/02/2025 17:13
Subject: If you knew you can only see your adult kids 15 more times before you die, how would you feel?
There is so much communication available when you are apart I would not think about it.
Anonymous
04/02/2025 17:12
Subject: If you knew you can only see your adult kids 15 more times before you die, how would you feel?
My elderly neighbors just emailed us to say they’re moving to an another state to be close to their children (and grandchildren.)
They always tell us when they’re out of town and it adds to about twice a year visits. They did the same math you did and decided to do something about it.
Own your choices OP
They always tell us when they’re out of town and it adds to about twice a year visits. They did the same math you did and decided to do something about it.
Own your choices OP
Anonymous
04/02/2025 17:08
Subject: If you knew you can only see your adult kids 15 more times before you die, how would you feel?
It’s sad.
Anonymous
04/02/2025 16:41
Subject: If you knew you can only see your adult kids 15 more times before you die, how would you feel?
If you are 60+ and live in another state and meet every year, you are probably going to meet them 15 times, if twice a year than probably 30 more meetups before you die. Even that's not a given. Let that thought sink in. What would you do to make the most of it?