I *feel* as though I'm fine and functional, but I am also so so SO tired at the end of every day, which I assume is stress.

Anonymous wrote:It is because you have a baby. You can indulge in this sort of behavior. Even more so kidless. When my mom was dying I definitely felt like iI was just going through the motions of life, and only doing what needed to be done but I had two elementary schoolers and I didn’t want to freak them out so I acted mostly the same.

+1 I agree with PP, although I would phrase it a little more gently.

Kids are both the joy and the distraction in our lives right now. Grateful for them.

Anonymous wrote:We are focused on figuring out new routines with RTO and commuting. We both have lots of seniority so hoping to survive RIFs but who knows.

This is not a normal RIF. Seniority won’t save people when their entire office is being eliminated.

I spend a lot more time reading the news and reddit, and a large part of my conversations with friends revolve around work stuff. I'm not sleeping well.

But, I have two kids, and for their sake I am trying to keep things as normal as possible. I don't want to steal their childhoods. So, school activities, sports, etc continue mostly as normal. I am conscious of trying to reduce spending, so we're not eating out as much and I'm thinking differently about summer vacation. They're still doing camps, and we'll do some kind of driving trip.

Anonymous wrote:We are focused on figuring out new routines with RTO and commuting. We both have lots of seniority so hoping to survive RIFs but who knows.

+1. We've both been in the federal government for almost 20 years so we should have enough seniority, and our jobs are statutory (for now) - but it's stressful. However, having older elementary aged kids with activities and commitments outside of work doesn't give me a lot of time to wallow in the stress of it. February was tough for me, but now I'm trying to focus on things outside of work. Trying to cut back on spending, but dealing with increased RTO costs (increased parking, tolls, gas, new clothes, lunch for days we run out of time to pack, etc). We already booked and paid for spring break in the fall, so we're taking our spring break vacation but we are not going on a summer trip this year.

We are focused on figuring out new routines with RTO and commuting. We both have lots of seniority so hoping to survive RIFs but who knows.

Single divorced female late 50s fed without adequate retirement savings yet.

I am highly employable outside of the federal government, and that certainly shapes my attitude. But I have to actively work, as in throw the phone across the room, to avoid following every evil development and thus torpedo my mental health. Every day, I deliberately choose to do no cost activities that delight me to offset the putrid around me. Walk in the woods, play with my dogs, try out a new complicated recipe, plant flowers.

It is because you have a baby. You can indulge in this sort of behavior. Even more so kidless. When my mom was dying I definitely felt like iI was just going through the motions of life, and only doing what needed to be done but I had two elementary schoolers and I didn’t want to freak them out so I acted mostly the same.

Dual Feds and we are anxious all the time. We do what we have to, but kids know we are in a save money, no summer vacation, dreading every work week mode.

I’ve been through layoffs before, but this is different in listings MONTHS and impacting both of us (we are in very different industries) simultaneously.

Probably akin to a company town dying, which is generally traumatic all around.

Stressed out of my mind but putting a bold face on it. Having an early miscarriage and not talking about it. Quietly getting house in order so we can move if RIFs actually hit us. Wishing it would just get it over with already, all of it.

Well,.we aren't spending that much money, but other than that...

I’m still employed - probationary but never got fired. I’ve been numb the last few months, only felt up to doing the bare minimum. But I can only live like that so long, so I’m starting to have fun again.

Daily life continues, of course, but I'm losing free time to job hunting. And I've had a series of illnesses which are probably stress related.

I belong to a community group that happens to be mostly feds, so on the one hand it's nice to have a reason to socialize and on the other hand it's hard not to talk about work even more.

I am a fed but I am living my normal life outside of work other than saving money and being frugal. It helps that DH is not a fed and my kids are older so we have to maintain normalcy for their sake but also I have been laid off from the private sector before so this is not a new rodeo for me that way and also I come from a truly awful background in terms of danger/badness so I am going “well, whatever else is going on, I am not in danger of starving to death or getting bombed.”

I think it is different for everyone. I have fed friends who are freaking out and others who are like me.

Meaning are you living your regular life outside of work and on the weekends? Feels like all my coworkers are doing normal things - coaching soccer, took the kids fishing, people are talking about March Madness, going to the cherry blossoms etc.

DH and I are dual fed and we both feel like we're just sitting around, barely functional. May be that we have a baby so while he needs to eat/nap, he's not asking to go to his best friend's birthday party, nor do we really need to keep him occupied. FWIW we were both private sector and have been through layoffs before and it was kind of like this then too - like you just do what you have to do - dishes, laundry, errands, barely throwing together meals that aren't particularly great - and otherwise it's just low key worrying/sitting around.

Is this just us? How is your day to day (outside of RTO).