We host a lot. Most important is to make sure the guests will mesh well together. So if it's more than one family, I'm careful to think who would work well together.
I always ask if there are dietary restrictions and plan a menu. I never serve anything totally new to guests, either so a trial run or fall back on something tried and true. Maybe a new salad on rare occasion.
If kids are invited I ask if there are things they absolutely don't like.
For families new to our house I share the menu with them and if anyone asks to bring something I'm I always say bread or dessert would be lovely but please don't worry if you don't have time to get anything. People want to contribute but I don't want them to mess up my plans.
We are shoes off but people can do as they wish and we have a front rug shoes can be wiped on.
I aim for the last 15 min before guests arrive to be clean up so cooking dishes etc are all put away etc.
And we just try to be really nice, not too stuffy. I set the table with a tablecloth and fabric napkins no matter who is coming because that's what I like.

Anonymous wrote:#1 is make everyone feel comfortable, even if it’s not how you prefer people to behave in your house. I dont mean they can dance on tables, but… shoes are OK even if you are a shoe-less household. Put paper hand towels in the bathroom, not everyone wants to use a previously used hand towel. if you are letting people wander with food/drink, put coasters out but dont expect everyone will use them and dont be neurotic about it. #2 is do your best to enjoy yourself - people will take their cues from you. I do as much as I possibly can ahead of time, tag a friend or 2 to help keep an eye on things that could need refreshing (ice, drinks, crackers), and then try to mingle and enjoy my guests.

Completely agree. House rules have become more important than guest comfort.

And please, save me your responses "so you'd let someone smoke in your house and jump on your bed?" Don't use dumb examples.

Anonymous wrote:As host, rule number one is to always set the example by being the most well dressed and well spoken person at the event.

I will say welcoming and cheerful than well dressed.

Anonymous wrote:#1 is make everyone feel comfortable, even if it’s not how you prefer people to behave in your house. I dont mean they can dance on tables, but… shoes are OK even if you are a shoe-less household. Put paper hand towels in the bathroom, not everyone wants to use a previously used hand towel. if you are letting people wander with food/drink, put coasters out but dont expect everyone will use them and dont be neurotic about it. #2 is do your best to enjoy yourself - people will take their cues from you. I do as much as I possibly can ahead of time, tag a friend or 2 to help keep an eye on things that could need refreshing (ice, drinks, crackers), and then try to mingle and enjoy my guests.

Strongly disagree. People who are not behaving in a way you’re comfortable with shouldn’t be returning. Shoeless households need to be respected as do a hosts presence to eliminate paper waste (the hand towel comment). Agree with first PP that the key is to communicate your expectations, it’s not to remove them altogether.

#1 is make everyone feel comfortable, even if it’s not how you prefer people to behave in your house. I dont mean they can dance on tables, but… shoes are OK even if you are a shoe-less household. Put paper hand towels in the bathroom, not everyone wants to use a previously used hand towel. if you are letting people wander with food/drink, put coasters out but dont expect everyone will use them and dont be neurotic about it. #2 is do your best to enjoy yourself - people will take their cues from you. I do as much as I possibly can ahead of time, tag a friend or 2 to help keep an eye on things that could need refreshing (ice, drinks, crackers), and then try to mingle and enjoy my guests.

As host, rule number one is to always set the example by being the most well dressed and well spoken person at the event.

Start by being very clear and communicative with your guests:

Ask about allergies (not only to food - you could be inviting someone to your home where you have pets and they are allergic to animal dander.)

Make it clear whether you're curating a menu (so they should not bring any items) or whether it's potluck (and if so, be specific about what you want them to bring - a dessert or a salad etc. )

If there is a theme or a dress code or children are or aren't included in the invitation - all of this should be made clear upfront.

For those of you who entertain a lot, please share some of your how tos. What are some of the guidelines and etiquette