Anonymous wrote:How old are the kids? Will the figure out dad’s friend is an AP? Have you and he talked about when it’s okay to introduce new people?
Yes, it’s quite possible that the affair will fizzle out when the reality of life with kids hits, esp when they are not your kids. It’s also possible that she will take on the stepparent role, whether grudgingly or happily. Best you can hope for is that she is good to them, communicates with you and doesn’t throw your kids under the bus if/when she and your Stbx have kids. The less drama the kids feel, the better, even though it sucks for you.
1. 8 and 5
2. I don’t think so at this age but maybe later on looking back?
3. This is one thing we are finalizing. I’m inclined to have a longer timeline when they are younger but could relax more as they become teenagers (for instance if this relationship doesn’t work out). I’m not interested in bringing another man into my family anytime soon.