Anonymous
02/23/2025 14:03
Subject: How do you deal with a crushing fear of death?
Isn’t this why they invented religion? There is a magical fairy tale ending for you.
Anonymous
02/23/2025 13:03
Subject: How do you deal with a crushing fear of death?
I just read a book on the work of a death doula, which was unexpectedly wonderful to read. It is Briefly Perfectly Human by Alua Arthur. My book group chose it and I would not read it normally, but I found it moving and profound and helped me work through my own fear of death.
Anonymous
02/23/2025 11:50
Subject: How do you deal with a crushing fear of death?
Intrusive persistent thoughts —> therapy. You don’t have to live like this.
Anonymous
02/23/2025 10:01
Subject: Re:How do you deal with a crushing fear of death?
Anonymous wrote:I believe that dying well is closely connected to living well - taking care of ourselves and our loved ones, and hopefully others when the opportunities arise.
Death is coming for all of us. I personally believe that our soul/ consciousness most likely transcends physical death but if it doesn’t, I won’t be around to worry about it.
I try to live with compassion for myself and others. I can’t love others without loving myself.
There is no point living in crippling fear of something that is unavoidable. For me, daily walks, yoga, being part of a supportive faith community, accepting my human limits, making art, music and cultivating love and thanksgiving inside myself every day, helps me to not live in overwhelming fear.
It is normal to be afraid sometimes - it is helpful for me to observe those feelings as they come up but to let them go. That is called cultivating a witness position to navigate your mind’s games that don’t always serve us well.
The book The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer describes how you can untie your self from your ego, harness your inner energy, expand beyond your superficial sense of self in order to float more often through life instead of blocking or fighting parts of ourselves and forces in life that are outside our control. It takes a while to be able to let go of feelings that don’t serve us well though.
Best wishes OP
DP but this is fantastically written. Thank you for posting!
Anonymous
02/23/2025 09:49
Subject: How do you deal with a crushing fear of death?
I have an adopted child who came along later in life. Not as afraid of dying and having her without me because I said to her that whatever I wanted to prove and hoped to accomplish I was able to do. And to use that as an example, not worry that I was held back or had major regrets.
Anonymous
02/22/2025 20:43
Subject: How do you deal with a crushing fear of death?
There is no point of being afraid of something that will happen to all of us. Just live life to its fullest. Losing my dad suddenly was very difficult but also made me less afraid of death. Mostly because I saw life goes on and you can still find happiness and joy in life, even after the loss of a very important person in your life. I know even if I die, my kids will be ok and be able to still enjoy life.
Anonymous
02/22/2025 14:08
Subject: Re:How do you deal with a crushing fear of death?
Anonymous wrote:I believe that dying well is closely connected to living well - taking care of ourselves and our loved ones, and hopefully others when the opportunities arise.
Death is coming for all of us. I personally believe that our soul/ consciousness most likely transcends physical death but if it doesn’t, I won’t be around to worry about it.
I try to live with compassion for myself and others. I can’t love others without loving myself.
There is no point living in crippling fear of something that is unavoidable. For me, daily walks, yoga, being part of a supportive faith community, accepting my human limits, making art, music and cultivating love and thanksgiving inside myself every day, helps me to not live in overwhelming fear.
It is normal to be afraid sometimes - it is helpful for me to observe those feelings as they come up but to let them go. That is called cultivating a witness position to navigate your mind’s games that don’t always serve us well.
The book The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer describes how you can untie your self from your ego, harness your inner energy, expand beyond your superficial sense of self in order to float more often through life instead of blocking or fighting parts of ourselves and forces in life that are outside our control. It takes a while to be able to let go of feelings that don’t serve us well though.
Best wishes OP
In the more practical side, do you already have in place:
- guardians for your young children if anything happens to you;
- estate plan with instructions for providing for your family if you should pass early;
- moment books for each child of their early years with special Milestones and how they are loved deeply?
I remember being afraid of this when my children were young and the above helped to put my mind at ease (plus a life insurance plan to provide for them).
Assuming you have attended to practical preparations for passing before children are grown, the above is how I handle more general fears .
Best wishes OP
Anonymous
02/22/2025 13:39
Subject: Re:How do you deal with a crushing fear of death?
I believe that dying well is closely connected to living well - taking care of ourselves and our loved ones, and hopefully others when the opportunities arise.
Death is coming for all of us. I personally believe that our soul/ consciousness most likely transcends physical death but if it doesn’t, I won’t be around to worry about it.
I try to live with compassion for myself and others. I can’t love others without loving myself.
There is no point living in crippling fear of something that is unavoidable. For me, daily walks, yoga, being part of a supportive faith community, accepting my human limits, making art, music and cultivating love and thanksgiving inside myself every day, helps me to not live in overwhelming fear.
It is normal to be afraid sometimes - it is helpful for me to observe those feelings as they come up but to let them go. That is called cultivating a witness position to navigate your mind’s games that don’t always serve us well.
The book The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer describes how you can untie your self from your ego, harness your inner energy, expand beyond your superficial sense of self in order to float more often through life instead of blocking or fighting parts of ourselves and forces in life that are outside our control. It takes a while to be able to let go of feelings that don’t serve us well though.
Best wishes OP
Death is coming for all of us. I personally believe that our soul/ consciousness most likely transcends physical death but if it doesn’t, I won’t be around to worry about it.
I try to live with compassion for myself and others. I can’t love others without loving myself.
There is no point living in crippling fear of something that is unavoidable. For me, daily walks, yoga, being part of a supportive faith community, accepting my human limits, making art, music and cultivating love and thanksgiving inside myself every day, helps me to not live in overwhelming fear.
It is normal to be afraid sometimes - it is helpful for me to observe those feelings as they come up but to let them go. That is called cultivating a witness position to navigate your mind’s games that don’t always serve us well.
The book The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer describes how you can untie your self from your ego, harness your inner energy, expand beyond your superficial sense of self in order to float more often through life instead of blocking or fighting parts of ourselves and forces in life that are outside our control. It takes a while to be able to let go of feelings that don’t serve us well though.
Best wishes OP
Anonymous
02/22/2025 10:00
Subject: How do you deal with a crushing fear of death?
Accept life is very unpredictable and just go with it.
Plan life insurance and will etc now.
Plan life insurance and will etc now.
Anonymous
02/21/2025 21:36
Subject: How do you deal with a crushing fear of death?
Anonymous wrote:I’m realizing what a crushing and paralyzing fear of death I have. I’m a 43yo mom of 3 young kids (3, 5, & 7) and after some recent health scares, I’m terrified I won’t live to see them grow up. I realize that’s a huge privilege not everyone gets. I also am aware that anyone could die at any moment—my husband, my kids, my other family members, my friends. I’m terrified of death to the point where it’s hard to function and my mind is a mess over this. How do people living knowing that anyone—themselves or their loved ones—could be taken from this world at any moment? I was raised Christian and still believe in God, but I am still so afraid. Would love any words of wisdom you can share.
Would I help at all to realize what incredible good fortune you've had already just by being born? think of the odds against it, from a biological point of view. All those particular people having sex, then coupling at the exact moment to eventually make you, not to mention all your predecessors surviving infancy and all the terrible wars and diseases and accidents that have befallen people through the centuries.
Of course, you're right that it could all be taken away at any moment, but what a miracle that we've been given the privilege of life at all.
You're right that life is a huge gamble. You're already a big winner. Lucky you. You've got a husband, kids, friends, even a faith that tells you that you're going to live forever. Maybe that's the part you don't really believe. If not, I don't blame you. I don't either, but I do believe that we're lucky to be here at all. Try to enjoy it and appreciate it. Be proud of the people you've created and the happiness you've brought to the people around you.
Anonymous
02/21/2025 20:32
Subject: How do you deal with a crushing fear of death?
I’m realizing what a crushing and paralyzing fear of death I have. I’m a 43yo mom of 3 young kids (3, 5, & 7) and after some recent health scares, I’m terrified I won’t live to see them grow up. I realize that’s a huge privilege not everyone gets. I also am aware that anyone could die at any moment—my husband, my kids, my other family members, my friends. I’m terrified of death to the point where it’s hard to function and my mind is a mess over this. How do people living knowing that anyone—themselves or their loved ones—could be taken from this world at any moment? I was raised Christian and still believe in God, but I am still so afraid. Would love any words of wisdom you can share.