OP, take your focus off him and get your ducks in a row to divorce. Be the best parent you can be for the kids. That is all you can control. It likely is linked to a person or the culture at the new job. I’m sorry.

You may want to read up on the 180.

The extent to which men can betray their wives and children when they are interested in a new woman is astonishing. It’s deeply cruel
and gutting. You no longer recognize the person, and they are resolute in their decision to distance themselves from their family. We need to do a better job of warning women about this. I was shocked when it happened to me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dig harder. The new job likely came with a shiny new coworker and suddenly everything else looks like old news.

+++ He may not be having an affair but he has his eye on someone else.

I'm positive he is having an emotional affair. Likely a physical one as well.

Anonymous wrote:Dig harder. The new job likely came with a shiny new coworker and suddenly everything else looks like old news.

+++ He may not be having an affair but he has his eye on someone else.

Send him to the doctor. He sounds depressed😔

When was his last physical? I’d start there before jumping to affairs. Sudden changes could be medical (thyroid or something?) assuming this is truly out of character for him.

Dig harder. The new job likely came with a shiny new coworker and suddenly everything else looks like old news.

If he’s living in the basement for over a month. Tell him to get out of the house.

Given what is going on in the world right now your kids do not need to be remained by a man baby daily.

Either he gets his shit together and works with you or kick him out your kids deserve better.

So what’s happening in therapy?

It could be depression or a midlife crisis. My husband didn’t have an affair but he was also kind of always a jerk.

Affair or depression.

Does he have a history of depression? Is he sleeping more, less interested in everything (beyond you and the kids), etc?

Definitely affair territory. And men are likely to want to overthrow their current family and start a new one ... Keep an eye out and listen to your gut!!

How many people readily admit their affairs when asked?

If he's not having an affair, he is depressed. He needs individual therapy stat.

12 years and three kids in and it’s like a flip switched.

Always a loving, devoted and present husband and father and within months he has done a 180.

He seems fed up with us all. I figured it was stress from new job. Cut him some slack and picked up more responsibilities around the house and with parenting.

He doesn’t want to be around us. He doesn’t parent. He sleeps in the basement.

Yes, I thought he may be having an affair. He denies. We started therapy. I gave him so many outs. If he wants a divorce and is that unhappy so be it but his disinterest in his kids is killing me and them.

How does a man go from being the picture perfect involved father to ignoring them at night when they ask for a bedtime story?