Anonymous
Post 01/09/2025 18:35     Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Why is he talking about this with you instead of his sister?
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2025 18:35     Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Anonymous wrote:Who owns the beach house?


OP here. My wife and I own the house and have for 4 years. We pay the taxes, the insane insurance, and I alone handle all of the repairs of which there is plenty. The upkeep runs about 10 grand a year minimum and I easily spend a week's labor dealing with the petty stuff like plumbing leaks, rotted deck board, replacing shingles, grading the drive, dock repairs, etc. As anyone who owns a beach house will tell you- the upkeep is constant. Salt water and wind destroy most things.
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2025 18:34     Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
You don't. You told him "no." That's the end of it.

Also, you don't know what "irony" is.
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2025 18:32     Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Let him fume. If he continues to pester you, explain precisely what you said here - he sold you his half of the house, and it isn't his to offer out. He does not have and never had an ownership interest in it. Him offering it to his girlfriend's kid would be like me offering to let my daughter stay in my grandparents shore house, that was sold to a third party 3o years ago. (It seems different, but form a legal perspective it's exactly the same. I never owned that house; he never owned the beach house.)

Apart from that, allowing a 20 yo who you have never met and all his fraternity brothers to live in the house for the summer would be the height of lunacy. I used to be a 20 year old fraternity kid - trust me on this.

tl;dr - tell him to pound sand. Just not at the beach house.
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2025 18:30     Subject: Re:DW's Inheritance- Beach House
If you own the house free and clear now, he can kick and scream all he wants. Or would be a hell no from me too. Family is the worst sometimes I swear.
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2025 18:29     Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Anonymous wrote:Who owns the beach house?


I wondered this too. OP, please tell us the deed is solely in your wife's name, or your name and hers jointly--? And BIL has zero reason to think he has any rights whatsover over this house, other than his suddenly tender feelings for it, which mean nothing in the face of a deed without his name on it....
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2025 18:26     Subject: Re:DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Anonymous wrote:Why not just offer to let him use the vacation house for the price of utilities and cleaning during his stay? Or charge him rent?


Because they want to use it
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2025 18:26     Subject: Re:DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Anonymous wrote:Why not just offer to let him use the vacation house for the price of utilities and cleaning during his stay? Or charge him rent?


Read the post, PP. Actually pay attention this time. The BIL would not even be present at the beach house but college frat boys whom OP has never met would be there. That's a hard no, rent or no rent.
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2025 18:26     Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Who owns the beach house?
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2025 18:25     Subject: Re:DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Anonymous wrote:Why not just offer to let him use the vacation house for the price of utilities and cleaning during his stay? Or charge him rent?


Why not forfeit use of a beach house for an entire summer, for cost, to someone you've never met?

Your BIL has b@lls, I'll give him that.

You should say, 'sure, but our kid has friend in Seattle for the summer and I told him he could have your house.'
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2025 18:24     Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
So, instead of having the house under your names, you all 'called the beach house ours'.
Why aren't your names on the house and the only keys?
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2025 18:23     Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Who owns it? If its in your name only and the title was transferred, just tell him you are not lending or renting it out. If he co-owns he he as the right to do that.
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2025 18:19     Subject: Re:DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Why not just offer to let him use the vacation house for the price of utilities and cleaning during his stay? Or charge him rent?
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2025 18:10     Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
Anonymous wrote:My wife's father died four years ago, her mother died 6 months later. The estate was large and included a big house in upper NW, a simple beach house in NC and a 2 bed Co-Op in Grammercy Park.

She has a brother (childless) living in Seattle. We are here in DC and have 3 kids. Neither my wife nor her brother wanted the NY apartment or the DC house. We wanted the NC beach house. He didn't, despite spending many summers there as a boy.

He was fine to have the proceeds of the sale of the other two properties distributed accordingly so we could have the beach house. Basically, we took ~$400,000 less than he did during the sales and called the beach house ours. Everyone was happy.

Now, he is dating a woman that is, ironically, from eastern NC; although, she lives in Seattle. She has a 20 yo son from a previous marriage living in NC. Long story short- my BIL has offered this kid and his frat brothers our beach house for the summer. We have never even met him. I told him no before I even spoke with my wife. Later, when I told my wife, she elevated it to a "hell no".

Now he's fuming and accusing us of 'taking' his 'childhood beach house'


How do you even begin to address an asshat like this?




A) Rich people's problems, tiny violin. B) Ask him if he'd like to return $200K in order to have 50% use of the beach house, also entailing 50% of property taxes and upkeep moving forward. But that would never translate to more than half the summer.
Anonymous
Post 01/09/2025 17:54     Subject: DW's Inheritance- Beach House
My wife's father died four years ago, her mother died 6 months later. The estate was large and included a big house in upper NW, a simple beach house in NC and a 2 bed Co-Op in Grammercy Park.

She has a brother (childless) living in Seattle. We are here in DC and have 3 kids. Neither my wife nor her brother wanted the NY apartment or the DC house. We wanted the NC beach house. He didn't, despite spending many summers there as a boy.

He was fine to have the proceeds of the sale of the other two properties distributed accordingly so we could have the beach house. Basically, we took ~$400,000 less than he did during the sales and called the beach house ours. Everyone was happy.

Now, he is dating a woman that is, ironically, from eastern NC; although, she lives in Seattle. She has a 20 yo son from a previous marriage living in NC. Long story short- my BIL has offered this kid and his frat brothers our beach house for the summer. We have never even met him. I told him no before I even spoke with my wife. Later, when I told my wife, she elevated it to a "hell no".

Now he's fuming and accusing us of 'taking' his 'childhood beach house'

How do you even begin to address an asshat like this?