This is so common my son and I have a term for it: the originals. It’s a business.

But if your kid is intrinsically motivated like mine all will work out. The grind works. (Top team ECNL player now at U16).

This seems like terrible development. However, the age group matters. What age group are you playing in? I wouldn't expect something so rigid until U16-U19 or in College or perhaps Varsity HS Soccer. Heck, the Pro's change their starting line ups often.

If you are at U12 and Below, you should defiantly send the Director of Coaching, Tech Director or Coaching leadership an e-mail with your concerns.

Someone mentioning picking his starting lineup, based on player attendance in later summer at hard to attend sessions. This is also a crap way to pick a starting line up, under the guise of 'player dedication' for kids who are at he mercy of their parents ability to get them to practices.

The lineups should rotate and starters should be picked based on recent practice performance. We are the GA team at u12 and the coaches make good starting lineup adjustments quite often... its done so well, it's not an issue.

Once some coaches form an opinion (and clubs too), it can be next to possible to change it even when the player has improved drastically and done everything right. At that point, it’s time to move on.

I’m critical of my kids’ play. I played through college myself and I’ve seen teams where they were not the best in there position and when they’d complain- I didn’t hesitate to tell them that—not in a negative way—but they had to work hard and improve. AND- I told them they couldn’t be “just as good” as the starter, they had to show they were better.

That sucks. We had that at prior clubs- depending on coach. One- my kid played the least minutes- but when he came in he’d score the only goal of the game or the one to take the championship, etc and it still never changed.

His new club/coach is performance and attendance based. My kid moved up to starter and gets 75-90 minutes a game. Except- when he’s having an off day—he sat the bench most of one game- playing only 20 min. Glad they pulled him out. He also has a tendency to earn his spot/time and then start to take it for granted and slide in intensity. I am thankful he gets the bench when that happens—I tell him the kid behind wants his spot and if he wants to keep it he can’t get lazy. It usually works the first time he gets pulled out or doesn’t start a half.

Yes, it’s normal and it’s terrible. It’s why soccer is so awful in the United States. My son plays for a U12 top EDP team and the coach chose his starting lineup based on who was at his surprise last minute summer practices. My son had already committed to an expensive soccer training program and developed tremendously there but it didn’t matter! he missed the first week of surprise practices because of his training program and then we were in our home country for the rest of the summer. Yes, that’s the only time we can go. We literally plan to come back in time for the start of the previously scheduled practice but by then, Coach has been training with the same kids who have nothing to do in their lives, but kiss his ass and sure enough they are the only ones that start. It’s very painful and has really diminished the confidence of a lot of players. Plus it doesn’t help the team. It’s not like we’re kicking ass because of it, the other kids are not developing and the team would’ve benefited from a better rotation on this. It’s a lose lose and classic emblem of American soccer.

You might think your child had improved but clearly the coach doesn't see it.

We have a different line up for every game.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. This is normal sorry to say.

yup baring injury or him showing up in a way that outshines his peers i practice… he probably wont sniff the field.

Go to practices and watch visibly from the sidelines. And be honest w urself and ur kid on whether or not he is outplaying his peers.

Document… approach coach and get ready to leave when/if it doesn’t go ur way

Have him start to practice w another team if his choosing that chooses him also. Just know word will travel …..so be ready

I go to every practice and watch closely. My kid is better than at least 3 of the starters. One has been injured most of the season and missed most practices but still shows for games, one makes tons of mistakes, and one refuses to pass. My kid is not injured, rarely makes wrong decisions, and is a team player/always passing the ball.
If it’s better for the team to be successful, why can’t the lineup be changed? This honestly makes no sense to me.
-OP

So many of us looking through filtered lenses have the wrong translation of what we see.
We all think our kid is better than so & so

Absolutely. Best to try to get an objective opinion, call around to other teams (comparable or better) and see if they'll have him out to one of their training sessions and get feedback. Generally this will get you a solid idea, no costs involved and as long as it's a comparable team or better, you'll get a fairly objective honest opinion.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. This is normal sorry to say.

yup baring injury or him showing up in a way that outshines his peers i practice… he probably wont sniff the field.

Go to practices and watch visibly from the sidelines. And be honest w urself and ur kid on whether or not he is outplaying his peers.

Document… approach coach and get ready to leave when/if it doesn’t go ur way

Have him start to practice w another team if his choosing that chooses him also. Just know word will travel …..so be ready

I go to every practice and watch closely. My kid is better than at least 3 of the starters. One has been injured most of the season and missed most practices but still shows for games, one makes tons of mistakes, and one refuses to pass. My kid is not injured, rarely makes wrong decisions, and is a team player/always passing the ball.
If it’s better for the team to be successful, why can’t the lineup be changed? This honestly makes no sense to me.
-OP

So many of us looking through filtered lenses have the wrong translation of what we see.
We all think our kid is better than so & so

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. This is normal sorry to say.

yup baring injury or him showing up in a way that outshines his peers i practice… he probably wont sniff the field.

Go to practices and watch visibly from the sidelines. And be honest w urself and ur kid on whether or not he is outplaying his peers.

Document… approach coach and get ready to leave when/if it doesn’t go ur way

Have him start to practice w another team if his choosing that chooses him also. Just know word will travel …..so be ready

I go to every practice and watch closely. My kid is better than at least 3 of the starters. One has been injured most of the season and missed most practices but still shows for games, one makes tons of mistakes, and one refuses to pass. My kid is not injured, rarely makes wrong decisions, and is a team player/always passing the ball.
If it’s better for the team to be successful, why can’t the lineup be changed? This honestly makes no sense to me.
-OP

yeah but what position does your kid play or can play? Is he better than those kids at his position?

There are other factors as well which I can share but we need more info

Coaches have favorites. There's another thread on that topic.

Secondly, think of it from a coaching perspective. Maybe your player is someone the coach sees as a player who can make a bigger impact coming off the bench later in the game. It could be a strategic move.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. This is normal sorry to say.

yup baring injury or him showing up in a way that outshines his peers i practice… he probably wont sniff the field.

Go to practices and watch visibly from the sidelines. And be honest w urself and ur kid on whether or not he is outplaying his peers.

Document… approach coach and get ready to leave when/if it doesn’t go ur way

Have him start to practice w another team if his choosing that chooses him also. Just know word will travel …..so be ready

I go to every practice and watch closely. My kid is better than at least 3 of the starters. One has been injured most of the season and missed most practices but still shows for games, one makes tons of mistakes, and one refuses to pass. My kid is not injured, rarely makes wrong decisions, and is a team player/always passing the ball.
If it’s better for the team to be successful, why can’t the lineup be changed? This honestly makes no sense to me.
-OP

yeah but what position does your kid play or can play? Is he better than those kids at his position?

There are other factors as well which I can share but we need more info

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. This is normal sorry to say.

yup baring injury or him showing up in a way that outshines his peers i practice… he probably wont sniff the field.

Go to practices and watch visibly from the sidelines. And be honest w urself and ur kid on whether or not he is outplaying his peers.

Document… approach coach and get ready to leave when/if it doesn’t go ur way

Have him start to practice w another team if his choosing that chooses him also. Just know word will travel …..so be ready

I go to every practice and watch closely. My kid is better than at least 3 of the starters. One has been injured most of the season and missed most practices but still shows for games, one makes tons of mistakes, and one refuses to pass. My kid is not injured, rarely makes wrong decisions, and is a team player/always passing the ball.
If it’s better for the team to be successful, why can’t the lineup be changed? This honestly makes no sense to me.
-OP

Hearing your opinion on your son's development and improvement.
What does the coach say?

Anonymous wrote:Yes. This is normal sorry to say.

yup baring injury or him showing up in a way that outshines his peers i practice… he probably wont sniff the field.

Go to practices and watch visibly from the sidelines. And be honest w urself and ur kid on whether or not he is outplaying his peers.

Document… approach coach and get ready to leave when/if it doesn’t go ur way

Have him start to practice w another team if his choosing that chooses him also. Just know word will travel …..so be ready

Yes. This is normal sorry to say.

Is this common for lineups to be established and unchanged the entire season? My kid has been benched first every single game the entire season, even though he has improved a lot and other players have consistently missed practice throughout the season, those kids are still always on the starting lineup. I’ve been told by other parents that once the lineup has been established at the beginning of the season, it usually doesn’t change. This seems really dumb and also unfair considering some kids talent starts falling away and other kids start to improve and really show what they’re made of. This is the A team in the age group.
Thoughts?