My parents restricted my food (well mostly my mom) and I developed an eating disorder. Even after I recovered I also not able for years to have any junk or sweets or anything unhealthy in the house. I had to make to disappear so it wouldn’t call it to me . I’ve learned to tell myself “there will always be food. I’m surrounded by it. I’m an adult and can choose to have it whenever I want it. So I really want this or am I scared I’m won’t be able to have any later?”
Took me years but I’m able to ignore almost everything and figure out if I really want it . Which is good because we have a lot of stuff around with kids that would have tempted me years ago.

The exception is ice cream. If it’s in the house I will eat it.

Box the cookies, put it in your closet. Eat it later.

Anonymous wrote:Have you ever talked to a therapist about your relationship with food? Might be best to start there.

+1.

OP, here’s my story. I have hovered around 25/26 BMI since I was a kid, but am very tall with a large frame (e.g., size 11 feet, fit into men’s tall raincoats, eg). I’m fit, I eat clean (very little sugar, no processed foods, very little alcohol).

As a kid, my mom restricted our food out of fear of gaining, plus cost. my brothers and I fought over food all the time and would eat raw flour, pasta, cheese, uncooked bacon—whatever we could find. We stole food from other people’s houses. I had pica and went through a period of eating gelcaps. My brother ate a small container of paint. During an illness, I wasn’t allowed to eat food that I could keep down and lost 30 pounds over a 10 week period.

My brother developed binge eating disorder and gained over 200 pounds. He eventually lost the weight but developed serious chronic conditions.

I dieted, weighed myself, exercised, walked, lifted weights, counted calories, etc, for 44 years. I have been in therapy, seen nutritionists, take antidepressants, do meditation, yoga, etc.

A few months ago after some weight gain/high blood pressure readings (perimenopause) she recommended Contrave to help with cravings.

OP—WITHIN 24 HOURS the food noise quieted down. I didn’t realize it was there until it was gone. I no longer had my life controlled by what and when and how I would eat and what that meant about me and my body and my body compared to others etc etc. It’s just…..quiet?

I’ve lost a few pounds but honestly I don’t care. The improvement in my quality of life is huge. There are some people for whom nature, nurture, or a combination of both turns on the food scarcity mindset. But I couldn’t fix it without meds.

I control my calorie intake because I have an auto-immune disease and I really want to stay independent for as long as possible. This was brought home to me a year ago when my symptoms started increasing. I know food won't make them go away, but at least I won't add cardiovascular issues or diabetes, or increase my family predispositions to cancer or dementia, to my existing problems.

I focus on eating clean, whole foods, lean protein, very little sugar and hardly any refined grains. This cuts out most of the aisles of regular supermarkets. When my kids were little and constantly bombarded by candy, desserts and opportunities for junk foods, it was difficult to eat healthy. But now one is in college, and the other is in high school and is aware of healthy food habits, it's much easier for me to make healthy choices.

Anonymous wrote:I have a certain fear of lacking food too. Grew up with 2 older brothers so had to eat fast to get seconds of the good stuff. Later on in high school / undergrad there wasn’t a lot of food around me (parents working too much to offer food outside meals, then university and no money), not starving at all but just enough pressure to create the food noise of “better eat it now if is available”

I started noticing my mindset was different when I was in front of all you can eat buffet or at cocktail parties. I would become way too obsessed of making sure I wasn’t missing an appetizer, and making use of all the opportunities to get as much food as possible. Then with my kids plate at home or at restaurants polishing their plates so that no food is wasted.


I am not fat by any means (bmi is probably 20-21). But I am a skinny fat always looking to tone and lose the last stubborn roll of belly fat. I spend quite a lot of efforts and money on gym memberships, fitness trackers, I have a tonal etc..

And one day it finally struck me. “On on hand I can’t resist barely edible free food or cold restaurant fries and on the other hand i pay XX$ a month to lose the couple pounds that behavior probably made me gain”.

Now every time I try to reach for food I want to eat out of “scarcity” mindset I tell myself “I spend twice as much money trying to lose the weight attached to this food, which is not even good. I am not hungry and I am not a trashcan”.

It works for me

I have a certain fear of lacking food too. Grew up with 2 older brothers so had to eat fast to get seconds of the good stuff. Later on in high school / undergrad there wasn’t a lot of food around me (parents working too much to offer food outside meals, then university and no money), not starving at all but just enough pressure to create the food noise of “better eat it now if is available”

I started noticing my mindset was different when I was in front of all you can eat buffet or at cocktail parties. I would become way too obsessed of making sure I wasn’t missing an appetizer, and making use of all the opportunities to get as much food as possible. Then with my kids plate at home or at restaurants polishing their plates so that no food is wasted.


I am not fat by any means (bmi is probably 20-21). But I am a skinny fat always looking to tone and lose the last stubborn roll of belly fat. I spend quite a lot of efforts and money on gym memberships, fitness trackers, I have a tonal etc..

And one day it finally struck me. “On on hand I can’t resist barely edible free food or cold restaurant fries and on the other hand i pay XX$ a month to lose the couple pounds that behavior probably made me gain”.

Now every time I try to reach for food I want to eat out of “scarcity” mindset I tell myself “I spend twice as much money trying to lose the weight attached to this food, which is not even good. I am not hungry and I am not a trashcan”.

It works for me

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not what you want to hear but this is the kind of “food noise” that people on semaglutides talk about.

Maybe you have willpower to say no to the cookie but many people don’t.

Hmm, thanks. Not willing to risk the side effects at this point.

What side effects are you concerned about?

Have you ever talked to a therapist about your relationship with food? Might be best to start there.

Anonymous wrote:Find something more productive to do than fixing on the cookie maybe?

This is a useless answer.

OP, the answer is senaglutide. It isn’t a psychological problem, it’s a physiological one.

Find something more productive to do than fixing on the cookie maybe?

Don't buy junk food.
Eating a more basic diet of meat, milk, eggs, legumes, whole grains is cheaper than buying pre-fab foods and junk food, and healthier as well.

Avoid fresh vegetables unless you grow them yourself, as that is where most people waste their money on "eating healthy", as frozen is usually better than fresh if buying from a store. Once you are buying healthy, you can eat more.

Also, more you move, more calories you burn, and higher you basal metabolic rate will be, so no worries.

Anonymous wrote:Not what you want to hear but this is the kind of “food noise” that people on semaglutides talk about.

Maybe you have willpower to say no to the cookie but many people don’t.

Hmm, thanks. Not willing to risk the side effects at this point.

Not what you want to hear but this is the kind of “food noise” that people on semaglutides talk about.

Maybe you have willpower to say no to the cookie but many people don’t.

Growing up, my younger brother was an elite athlete, and I was constantly being told to leave enough for him. I controlled my weight in college and just afterward because of financial restraints, but since marrying well-ish almost twenty years ago, I don't have that any restriction anymore and my weight has ballooned.

E.g., I'm sitting here right now thinking about the single cookie left on the kitchen counter, and how if I don't it eat it now, someone else will. I'm not hungry. I just know I won't get that cookie if I don't eat it now.

Is there a way past this?