Anonymous wrote:They'll miss some degree of taking personal responsibility for being somewhere on time and the opportunity to experience natural consequences if they fail. I'm not saying that's a reason to make them do it, but it's a "soft skill" that helps develop independence and resilience, IMO.

They'll also miss experiencing different social dynamics on the bus and the opportunity to interact more intimately with kids from your neighborhood. Those dynamics may not always be favorable, but the experience, too, builds character.

Are these things essential or critical? No... But you asked what will they miss. Chauffering them does keep them in a bubble.

This is similar to the way I view the bus. Do kids miss out on a big fun thing by not taking it? Of course not. But it feels to me like a tiny, reasonably controlled step toward independence, which I feel like many kids don't get enough of in childhood these days.

It varies from school to school. I think your husband is right tho. You need to get over your FOMO.

Literally nothing good happens on the bus. My son learned all the swear words, got to look at older kids' phones with videos. I personally was sexually assaulted on the bus by a kid my age, and had a grown man expose himself to me while I waited alone at the bus stop.

They will not miss anything. My kids are now in high school and college, and nothing happened at the bus stop that was important to my kids' social life or wellbeing at school. Sometimes riding the bus is fun in the early elementary school years, I agree. But the bus can also get noisy and way too hot.

In the afternoon, when the kids and tired and hangry, they can get entirely out of control, and there is little the bus driver can do. This is particularly true for middle school, the WORST years to use the bus: in my daughter's wealthy neighborhood public school, kids used the N-word on the bus, threw food and shoes, fought and there was even an alleged sexual act between two kids at the back of the bus... but shenanigans happen on the elementary and high school buses as well.

Anonymous wrote:Why doesn't DH walk them to the bus stop, since he seems to have time in the morning.

We walk to school and yes the parent community and kid interaction is great. Bus stop has some of the same feel. Being part of the car line routinely seems like the worst option.

I'm confused why the kids can't walk them to the bus stop by themselves?

I am concerned of bullying and missing, so I opt out using bus stop. I miss out networking/gossiping with neighnorhood parents at bus stop, so I don't know if we have kids with similar ages at neighborhood. We are not at home most of the home, so I think it is still fine.

Bullying!

They'll miss some degree of taking personal responsibility for being somewhere on time and the opportunity to experience natural consequences if they fail. I'm not saying that's a reason to make them do it, but it's a "soft skill" that helps develop independence and resilience, IMO.

They'll also miss experiencing different social dynamics on the bus and the opportunity to interact more intimately with kids from your neighborhood. Those dynamics may not always be favorable, but the experience, too, builds character.

Are these things essential or critical? No... But you asked what will they miss. Chauffering them does keep them in a bubble.

Why doesn't DH walk them to the bus stop, since he seems to have time in the morning.

We walk to school and yes the parent community and kid interaction is great. Bus stop has some of the same feel. Being part of the car line routinely seems like the worst option.

The bus could either be a good or a bad thing.

When I was a kid, buses were a vector for bullying. Mean kids rode in the back of the bus. I had to sit up front with the nerd kids to avoid issues.

A few minutes of talking to other friendly kids a day doesn't make any difference. But being around bullies is memorable.

It also matters how long the routes are. Long bus trips are annoying.

I also walked to school in elementary school (4 blocks). That was pretty ideal. But kids did harass and bully while walking to and from school.

I had to do car dropoffs and pickups K-12. My kids rarely observed any physical bullying the whole time they grew up. I attribute this to the fact that they were rarely unsupervised with classmates. Also there are more anti-bullying trainings now. And people don't think it's acceptable for boys to spar with their hands.

In elementary school the bus is fun. MY DD is now a junior in high school, but she did have fun ridding the bus on her K-8 school. She always had some great stories on something that happen...

Anonymous wrote:Does your neighborhood bus have room for your kids?

Yes. They have to. NP but that’s the rule - her kids are entitled to the bus even if it’s the last day of school and they have never ridden it before.

Why not let DH drive them and have the kids do the bus when he is out of town?

We do the bus bc the car line is a mess and I hate contributing to it. It’s also just easier. It’s okay to pick what is easiest for parents sometimes!

Does your neighborhood bus have room for your kids?

Kids are in elementary school. I start work early AM. Althougth I WFH I am unable to do the dropoff in the morning, DH drops them via car in the morning (on his way to work) which works for us.
But when DH travels for work, bus is probably easier for me.

My question is - I havent been at the bus stop or have networked with the other parents due to lack of time or energy in the mornings to do so (work related ). I want to start sending them via bus so they get used to it. DH says why change something that is already working.

Will they miss anything by not going on the bus? I am thinking socializing?

Before we make this change, wanted to hear from other parents about the pros and cons of it.

EDIT : My major concern is that kids are missing out on socializing in the neighborhood although I still cant drop them off. They go after school activities so they dont come by bus in the afternoon.

Their school bus has plenty of space available.