I agree with most people upthread, with one exception. We do care about the food in our group - but not that it must be fancy, it just has to be good, and plentiful.

So, do what you are comfortable with - happy hour, brunch, takeout pizza or Chinese or a straightforward meal you've made a million times and are comfortable with. These will all be better than you trying to do a multi-course meal that you haven't done before, and is out of your repertoire - if you do that, you'll be stressed and the meal might fail - and those are the things that ruin an event.

Oh and as someone else said - let people know what to expect on the invitation - so they don't show up dressed for a formal dinner when you are doing a taco bar. And, if they are the type who don't enjoy a taco bar - they can decline and you have more tacos for those who enjoy them!

You're doing the right thing, OP.

If you're not comfortable doing a full dinner party, do a happy hour with drinks and apps. Or Sunday brunch with good bagels, mimosas and a nice fruit salad. Or a dessert buffet. Just be clear on the invite what the plan is.

Have fun!

Anonymous wrote:Honestly I'm super laid back and care more about the company than the food so I'm good with pasta, tacos, pizza, burgers, etc. A warm, fun, and inviting host is way more important to me than the food. N

Same. Just set expectations - we’re having a chill pizza night! Come over for burgers on the grill! We’re hosting happy hour with an app spread!

You don’t have to dive right into a seated multi-course dinner party. The whole point is getting together, not putting on airs.

We usually do pizza or takeout, our friends keep coming, so they seem to just be happy to see us and not to have to cook. We've also done baked ziti with nice bread and salad. In the invite text , I ask if they want to come over for pizza or takeout, so they're not expecting fancy.

Giant pots of chili or soup with a crusty bread are good, and easy.

Nobody cares about the quality of food if you are a warm and welcoming host.

And it doesn't cost that much more to have a casual restaurant cater. Worth it to reduce the stress.

When we had small kids, we would get a big family meal x2 from a favorite restaurant. No complaints from guests! We did serve things in nicer servers but told everyone where it was from.

I think the key is to provide enough food and to provide options, I would do more than one appetizer and more than one side dish. Something like the taco bar someone suggested is a good way to go.

I often make an extremely easy tortilla soup when I host friends and it's a crowd pleaser. You don't have to cook fancy stuff to host.

We have some great friends and we often host and what I do is create a theme party and everybody brings something consistent with the theme. We organize around appetizers, main course and desserts. I make one of each and we provide all the drinks. I’m not a great cook but the food is always great! Our house is well set up for entertaining so hosting works for us.

Honestly, unless you plan to use these dinner parties to climb a social ladder, people will welcome anything you provide.

This past Friday I went to a pizza party where the hostess had recently purchased a small outside wood burning pizza oven. She ordered a bunch of dough from a local pizzeria, cooked up the crusts ahead of time and we just topped and heated up our own pizza in the oven. Delicious!

I’ve joyfully attended a build your burger dinner, a ‘bring on the apps’ dinner, a ‘all Trader Joe’s’ Party, and sit down traditional Moroccan feasts.

Any effort should be very welcome by anyone attending.

You’ve got this, op!

Can you pick one main dish and when people ask what they can bring assign out appetizer, salad, dessert? I find it easier to cook for hosting when I only need to focus on one thing. And people can get more excited when they are playing a part in a theme.

Here are some easy feed a crowd meals:
-Roast chicken (if you want to get fancy make a special sauce for on top or also smashed roast potatoes)
-Cook pork or chicken in instant pot, shred for tacos. Invite everyone to bring their favorite taco topping.
-One pot shrimp potatoes onions and corn
-Chili and rice or chili and cornbread
-puff pastry (premade) with roast veggie tart
-smash burgers. Barely need sides.

In my experience ppl love to be hosted and don’t mind contributing 1 thing. Providing the venue and the occasion is the value add here. Don’t worry about the food!

I like the idea of a taco bar. Or what about an easy soup, like chili, and everyone can make their own bowls with sides you buy (tortilla chips, cheddar cheese, sour cream).

honestly; I think it’s nice you want to host. Some of the funnest gatherings I’ve been to have been casual potlucks so consider that too.

Honestly I'm super laid back and care more about the company than the food so I'm good with pasta, tacos, pizza, burgers, etc. A warm, fun, and inviting host is way more important to me than the food. N

It’s outside of my budget to cater constantly, it feels tacky ordering carry out or pizza or similar, and somehow fraudulent to serve reheated prepared food.

I’ve tried to become a better cook but I’ve resigned myself at this point. Maybe when I retire and have more time I’ll try again. For now, I’m done.

So imagine you’re coming to my house for a dinner party and so far we only know each other casually. What would you expect considering the aforementioned? What would you advise me? FWIW, I’ve been told by smaller friend groups that I am a great host and my home is warm and inviting.