Consider why you are so judgmental. Why do you care. If you have a real reason to be unsupportive, politely decline.

Anonymous wrote:Skip the wedding if this is how you feel, they do not need your negative vibes at the wedding.

I don't know why people attend just to judge if couple is too young or too old, same race or interracial, same faith or interfaith, spending too little on caterer or too much, wearing too conservative or too revealing, invited too many people or too few, is of same gender or different, etc etc.

Just be happy for them and eat your chicken or stay home and send best wishes with a check. When you married, did you ask their opinion?

Skip the wedding if this is how you feel, they do not need your negative vibes at the wedding.

I've seen so many "mature" people in their 30's and 40's making such questionable decisions about dating, marrying, living and divorcing, it makes me skeptical about this assumption of maturity being some sort of guarantee for success.

Anonymous wrote:Why can’t we just be happy for people?

Because they see other people's choices as a reflection on themselves or their family. They want conformity to feel validated.

Why can’t we just be happy for people?

Anonymous wrote:We will be attending a wedding of a 22 year old couple and it feels like a train wreck. They just graduated from college a couple months ago. They are immature and the parents are religious so they were probably pressured. I feel bad that they won’t have a chance to grow up before making this commitment.

They are college educated grown adults with involved families. They don't need random guests to worry about their decision making. If you are so concerned about their future, give as much money as you can to facilitate their beginnings.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It either works or it doesn't, but they're young enough if it doesn't and they don't have kids it's a super easy divorce, a freebie basically. Plenty of friends/acquaintances who married right after college, divorced within 1 to 3 years and moved right along.

Due to their religion, divorce is not an option. This is it.

What BS. Divorce is always an option. I've seen quite a few of the "I don't believe in divorce" and "it's against my religion" divorces.

--family law attorney

They can be a couple for many years without a pressure to marry at 30 and immediately worrying about fertility window.

Anonymous wrote:It either works or it doesn't, but they're young enough if it doesn't and they don't have kids it's a super easy divorce, a freebie basically. Plenty of friends/acquaintances who married right after college, divorced within 1 to 3 years and moved right along.

Due to their religion, divorce is not an option. This is it.

Anonymous wrote:We will be attending a wedding of a 22 year old couple and it feels like a train wreck. They just graduated from college a couple months ago. They are immature and the parents are religious so they were probably pressured. I feel bad that they won’t have a chance to grow up before making this commitment.

Why the worse assumptions? You can feel good that they've each other, college education and family support so they can build their lives together. Free wedding is a great gift.

It either works or it doesn't, but they're young enough if it doesn't and they don't have kids it's a super easy divorce, a freebie basically. Plenty of friends/acquaintances who married right after college, divorced within 1 to 3 years and moved right along.

I got married at 22 right out of college with religious parents and in laws. We got to grow up together! I feel like that was such an amazing gift to have a shared young adulthood.

Done with babies by age 30, don’t have to worry about “his assets” and “her assets”, we literally had nothing when we married so everything is shared, no baggage from traumatic former relationships (I dated one guy in HS, I was his first gf)

FWIW, we are now atheists and raising our children in a secular household and I still wouldn’t change a thing.

If you can’t be happy for them, don’t go.

None of your business. I just went to the wedding of a 22 year old relative and it was fun!

We will be attending a wedding of a 22 year old couple and it feels like a train wreck. They just graduated from college a couple months ago. They are immature and the parents are religious so they were probably pressured. I feel bad that they won’t have a chance to grow up before making this commitment.