My DD just graduated from UCLA. We didn't hesitate for a second supporting her choice to go to the west coast. But we're lucky that money isn't an issue for us and DH travels a lot to the Bay Area for work. So hopping on a flight to California, even for a long weekend, wasn't a big deal for us. I was happy that I got to spend a lot of time in LA visiting her and really getting to know and enjoying the city. She is moving to New York now for work and is excited for her new experience there. But says emphatically that UCLA was absolutely the best possible college experience she could have had. She's living in NYC with three of her UCLA roommates.

Going far away from school has been the most amazing experience for my son. We miss him all the time but it’s worth it because he is thriving. The travel is a necessary pain and part of the experience. Highly recommend exploring if your child is so inclined.

My DC is loving UCLA. I was surprised they picked such a large school across the country, but they loved it above the other choices and are happy. With texting they don’t even feel that far away. The UC schools are great.

The travel is expensive and stressful, but we knew that going in. This decision is akin to “if you love something, set it free.”

Anonymous wrote:You need to decide what is best for your family. A desire for the sand and sun wouldn’t be enough for me. If is was a rare major, I might consider it.

Same here. They can seek a western adventure on their own dime after college.

It can seem overwhelming, but really, it’s not a big deal and by sophomore year, the logistics of putting things in storage for summer, booking flights for breaks, packing an extra bag to fly home for summer, and the travel itself are easy to manage because been there, done that.

Yes flying home, they lose time due to time zones, but flying back to school they gain it back, so getting home for thanksgiving is perfectly doable. All the other breaks are easier because they are longer.

- parent of senior in a CA

Both of my kids went on the other coast. One just transferred closer to home. It’s strange for me to have one close. I’m of the camp that kids should make their own college choices (assuming it works financially for you). My kids were exposed the different places and in a way, different cultures (still American, but different). Yes, it involves making travel arrangements but we travel a fair amount anyway so that’s not a deal breaker for us.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Travel is really hard and expensive. And in the case of UW, they’re on the quarter system so you can end up out of sync with friends. They don’t go back until mid-September.

I myself went to a school in the east coast and had a full 12+ hours of travel to get there by plane. But flights were expensive so I often stayed there for breaks, even when everyone else left. Sometimes I was invited to people’s houses but I couldn’t afford to tag along on trips. That was isolating and not a great part of my college experience.

That's only an issue for a semester until you move on from HS friends and your college friends are your new friend group.

The new college friend group will be going back to their own homes during the summer.

I'm originally from CA; we go back often. My kids love CA weather and lifestyle, but it's too expensive and difficult to deal with (travel especially during the hoildays, movein/out). I told them to just find a job there after graduation.

Anonymous wrote:Travel is really hard and expensive. And in the case of UW, they’re on the quarter system so you can end up out of sync with friends. They don’t go back until mid-September.

I myself went to a school in the east coast and had a full 12+ hours of travel to get there by plane. But flights were expensive so I often stayed there for breaks, even when everyone else left. Sometimes I was invited to people’s houses but I couldn’t afford to tag along on trips. That was isolating and not a great part of my college experience.

That's only an issue for a semester until you move on from HS friends and your college friends are your new friend group.

Anonymous wrote:Has it worked out for your child? I am worried about it. DD likes a lot of California schools, University of Washington as well.

We’ll see in a couple of weeks when DD starts at UCLA.

I went the other way, and am so grateful my parents allowed me to spread my wings and experience something completely new and different. My entire extended family in all directions lived in California, I wanted nothing more than to get out and go to the east coast. My parents told me I had $x to spend on college, it was an exercise in seeing how to make it work.

I actually tried staying in state for a semester and was miserable and transfered east and thrived. It meant that I only went home for school breaks (Christmas, summer), but that was fine with me!

Please, if it's financially equivalent, let your child go where they want to go.

You need to decide what is best for your family. A desire for the sand and sun wouldn’t be enough for me. If is was a rare major, I might consider it.

Travel is really hard and expensive. And in the case of UW, they’re on the quarter system so you can end up out of sync with friends. They don’t go back until mid-September.

I myself went to a school in the east coast and had a full 12+ hours of travel to get there by plane. But flights were expensive so I often stayed there for breaks, even when everyone else left. Sometimes I was invited to people’s houses but I couldn’t afford to tag along on trips. That was isolating and not a great part of my college experience.

It can work but it is just harder. Travel is more expensive. The time change makes connecting harder and when it is difficult to come home for short periods, due to time to travel, cost and adjustment to 3 hour time change. I hate it but DS is happy!

--Parent of adult kid who lives on the West Coast

Has it worked out for your child? I am worried about it. DD likes a lot of California schools, University of Washington as well.