Anonymous wrote:My DS was like this until he was about 11. Something shifted at that point and he finally started playing with confidence. He was aggressive on the field (in a good way). It’s like his competitive side finally came out. Might be early puberty or perhaps emotional maturity.

DS had a similar experience. He made an A team in soccer at u9 only to be moved to B within weeks because he wasn’t aggressive enough. I am thankful for that coach because he took a lot of time explaining his decision. He felt DS was a standout at tryouts but once everyone on the field was strong and physical, he was intimidated and backed off the ball. He was worried about getting a red card because he had a rule following personality so he thought any physical contact would get him carded. The coach pulled him aside frequently and said not to give up. He eventually moved to the goal where he was a standout and had less issue with aggression but when they put him on the field he was a deer in the headlights. But we always remembered that first coach! It took years but at 13 he became very physical. Maybe puberty or maybe maturity as the above PP said? He made his way back to a very strong A team where he plays a clean game but is fearless and not afraid to push back when needed.

My DS was like this until he was about 11. Something shifted at that point and he finally started playing with confidence. He was aggressive on the field (in a good way). It’s like his competitive side finally came out. Might be early puberty or perhaps emotional maturity.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A family from our travel hockey team with similar concerns put their kid in boxing, and we saw a significant change after about six months.

My kid has always been more aggressive than skilled, but once some kids started puberty before him, he's all about getting faster and more skilled!

Ugh. Not if you want a functioning brain for the rest of your life.

Yeah can’t believe someone recommended boxing

Anonymous wrote:A family from our travel hockey team with similar concerns put their kid in boxing, and we saw a significant change after about six months.

My kid has always been more aggressive than skilled, but once some kids started puberty before him, he's all about getting faster and more skilled!

Ugh. Not if you want a functioning brain for the rest of your life.

Is there boys volleyball?

Tennis. Learn defensive shot, rally ball, and aggressive shot. So it's aggressive but without your body in proximity.

Rowing…in a few years

Rock climbing. You can do low key or join a competitive club. My boys love it. It’s a great activity to do later in life too.

Maybe keep him in rec for now. We have a friend who pulled his kid from club baseball, and only kept them in private lessons which we thought was stupid. Jokes on us because this kid hit puberty has come back after only doing private training for a couple years and is killing it.

Anonymous wrote:Try karate or taekwando, seriously. It made a big difference in confidence and coordination for my son who is similar. We did it at a much younger age, but saw a huge shift before/after.

Point out that he won't excel in these sports that he loves until he overcomes his hesitation.

We did. He was bored out of his mind. He could run continuously for an hour...no joke. Maybe track and field?

Pickleball

A family from our travel hockey team with similar concerns put their kid in boxing, and we saw a significant change after about six months.

My kid has always been more aggressive than skilled, but once some kids started puberty before him, he's all about getting faster and more skilled!

Try karate or taekwando, seriously. It made a big difference in confidence and coordination for my son who is similar. We did it at a much younger age, but saw a huge shift before/after.

Point out that he won't excel in these sports that he loves until he overcomes his hesitation.

Give him time. Puberty is a huge game changer with sports.

My 10 year old LOVES sports. All sports. Loves to play rec, loves to play with friends, is in very good physical shape. He wants to do more competitive sports and he easily made a travel basketball and soccer league last year, but once he was on the team it was awful--he was so intimidated by the level of playing and barely got any playing time...and even when he did, he didn't touch the ball.

I'd like to get him involved in some other activities that will let him be athletic but not require such assertiveness. Maybe tennis? He says no to karate, swimming and gymnastics. He adores basketball, soccer and flag football....so long as he doesn't have to touch anyone lol.