Anonymous
Post 07/21/2024 15:12     Subject: What red flag did you overlook in spouse?
He hid the red flags very well until after the wedding. However, after engagement I discovered hx of sexual abuse and bipolar disorder in the extended family, and should have run.
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2024 15:10     Subject: What red flag did you overlook in spouse?
I think my husband would mention that I'm a liberal, and I would mention that he's conservative. But he's not a MAGA/fascist. He's kind to everyone. We agree that it's similar to two people of different religions and it's really not a dealbreaker.
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2024 15:06     Subject: What red flag did you overlook in spouse?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Funny how the only thing perfect people can't do is pick a perfect spouse.



This is worth pondering about.


I just posted uncontrolled anger. You are right. I don't know exactly what my husband would post about me. Likely my drinking problem, which reached a destructive level around 5-6 years ago. I got sober 22 months ago, but he's still got the anger.
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2024 15:00     Subject: What red flag did you overlook in spouse?
Uncontrolled anger. I only saw it once before the wedding. He suppressed it really well.
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2024 14:56     Subject: What red flag did you overlook in spouse?
Anonymous wrote:Funny how the only thing perfect people can't do is pick a perfect spouse.



This is worth pondering about.
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2024 14:55     Subject: What red flag did you overlook in spouse?
* red flags women should avoid
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2024 14:55     Subject: What red flag did you overlook in spouse?
Anger, addiction, cheating, debt history, family enmeshing.
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2024 14:26     Subject: What red flag did you overlook in spouse?
I seriously was creeped out by his parents and didn’t know why.
He admitted later that they were incredibly abusive. Thankfully he went no contact after that.
Unfortunately the damage has been done, and he has some serious C-PTSD issues that have led to major problems in our marriage.
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2024 14:22     Subject: Re:What red flag did you overlook in spouse?
Psychiatric issues. A wonderful woman overall, so I never gave a thought to leaving the marriage.
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2024 14:20     Subject: What red flag did you overlook in spouse?
Funny how the only thing perfect people can't do is pick a perfect spouse.
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2024 14:16     Subject: What red flag did you overlook in spouse?
Not worth it but no emotions and I totally missed severe ADHD and the fact he can't complete any task at all or plan anything. I was really young.
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2024 14:04     Subject: What red flag did you overlook in spouse?
Ego and all caught up in academic values.
Still married.
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2024 14:02     Subject: What red flag did you overlook in spouse?
Enmeshment with his parents.

Luckily, they live overseas (he moved here), so the impact is limited. If they lived in US, we’d be divorced by now.
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2024 13:42     Subject: What red flag did you overlook in spouse?
Classic signs of ADHD. Had no personal experience before then so wasn’t aware. It’s tough
Anonymous
Post 07/21/2024 13:41     Subject: What red flag did you overlook in spouse?
What red flag did you overlook in spouse, that in the end was worth it for the relationship to continue?