Anonymous wrote:She wasn't outraged. She she didn't want her stepmom using his milestone birthday to give a lecture to all his friends and family about their great love affair.

She was totally unhinged about it and her big beef (other than concerns about her inheritance) were that she couldn’t understand this kind of marriage. I thought it sounded sweet - two old friends who make special time for each other, maybe some old people sex a couple times a year; who also don’t rearrange everything in their lives but want it to be clear they’re together and love each other.

Not practical for raising children but very cool for a second marriage for older folk.

Anonymous wrote:Your spouse suggests that, see a lawyer immediately and get your ducks in a row, you are getting divorced and they’re probably cheating.

+1 million

We have plenty of solo space so I don’t see the need to take a break from my spouse and definitely not from my marriage. We are pretty independent people with different hobbies and interests but we love our time together. If we were joined at the hip 24/7 I could see the need for a break.

Like in All Fours?

Anonymous wrote:You should be able to have that space without a formal “break.”

+1

I don’t think you should need a break from marriage to do this. I do think some separate friends/activities/interests is good and healthy.

Marriage is a business.

We do “solo nights” once per week where it’s expected we do our own thing. He uses his for video games usually, or his fantasy sports leagues when in season. I like to catch up with friends or even have dinner out alone after running errands. It’s a nice break.

She wasn't outraged. She she didn't want her stepmom using his milestone birthday to give a lecture to all his friends and family about their great love affair.

Someone was posting yesterday about how her father was married for decades until her mother died and then a few years later reconnected with someone he knew from childhood and got married... the new spouse lives in Wisconsin, the father here, and they get together a few times a year.

Honestly, that sounds kinda dope. She was all outraged about it.

Your spouse suggests that, see a lawyer immediately and get your ducks in a row, you are getting divorced and they’re probably cheating.

Anonymous wrote:Do you think your marriage would benefit from a break if your spouse was on board with it?

I don't mean that either gets a pass to go wild and be eith others but just giving each other space to grow as an individual outside of your relationship.

What does the bolded even mean? Give some examples.

You should be able to have that space without a formal “break.”

How would that look like? If you take on a short job assignment in another country, you don't even need to express it as a "break".

Do you think your marriage would benefit from a break if your spouse was on board with it?

I don't mean that either gets a pass to go wild and be eith others but just giving each other space to grow as an individual outside of your relationship.