Anonymous wrote:I know this is ridiculous but can’t get it out of my head. I work with people who attended world class universities and while I went to an okay liberal arts college, wish I had tried harder in high school to get into a better one. I was depressed and under enormous pressure as a teenager and stopped trying, and got rejected from most schools I applied to. I’m now in a career I love but still wonder if those college years could have been more enjoyable at a better school, that I missed out and am somehow how less worthy than those who did get in.

Most everything else in my life has turned out well. This just rankles me. I know it’s silly.

You are not less-worthy because you attended a non-prestigious college.

Undergraduate years can be more enjoyable at highly selective colleges & universities if you enjoy being among intelligent, hard-working, motivated high achievers.

A degree from an elite school is also important in the field of management consulting.

OP: What type of work do you do ? Or in which industry ?

Anonymous wrote:The joke's on them: they ended up at the same place as you.

+1

Went to an event recently for graduates of Ivy League schools and Ivy+ universities sponsored by an investment banking firm in an area outside of the DMV.

Many with Ivy degrees were not financially successful (such as a couple of 40+ year old social workers with degrees from Brown and several others in different career fields from various Ivy League schools).

Several individuals--also well above age 40--in law, medicine,and investment banking/finance appeared to be financially successful, but the attorneys with Harvard degrees were insufferable/snobby. Typical surgeons--sport coat, blue jeans, huge ego, and an expensive sports car (Porsche), but nice personalities.

The young crowd--in their early 30s--all seemed to be single, struggling & a bit unsure of themselves, although all in professions which require graduate degrees/extended study (law, medicine,architecture).

OP: Outside of Biglaw and investment banking on the east coast, it really doesn't matter where you went to college--especially if you ended up in the same place with fellow co-workers with degrees from elite schools.

I’d be more concerned that you didn’t get a graduate degree.

If it helps, I went to a high prestige school and due to a variety of life choices I am a very low earner. This is despite having worked consistently since I graduated college. So I have that to fuel my insecurities

We should both just let it go and be happy with what we have.

A top school can open doors for you early on but at the end of the day it’s how you perform that counts. My first job was very MBA oriented with most from Harvard, Stanford etc. I was from a tier 2 MBA program. Many of them flamed out while I did very well.

Anonymous wrote:The joke's on them: they ended up at the same place as you.

+1 and I'm sure you are not the only one. People only tend to mention the college if it's a "name" which just reinforces the idea that the name is important or most successful people go to those colleges. For most fields it's simply not true.

I went to a regional public college and work with with people who went to all kinds of schools. Nobody cares. FWIW, our amazing CEO went to a regional LAC I'd never heard of.

I went to community college. I work with people who went to Ivies. Nobody ever asks anyone where they went, and everyone respects everyone for what they do NOW. I get asked for advice from people who went to Yale and Dartmouth and Harvard regularly. I’m smart, professional, have good ethics, and am funny. So my coworkers like me. By the time you’re 30, where you went to school is basically irrelevant.

The joke's on them: they ended up at the same place as you.

Anonymous wrote:Once you start working, nobody cares where you went to school.

+1 and if they ask, they're the ones with a chip on their shoulder.

I went to a no name state u and worked for a FAANG along side people who graduated from Cornell and MIT, to name drop a few, and other state U grads. Most of us were not CS majors. This was several years ago, btw. We were all high performers.

Once you start working, nobody cares where you went to school.

I don’t think people generally care but if it bothers you that much go back to graduate school at a better college.

Imposter syndrome

Do people talk about it or are you mostly in your head?

I sometimes feel the same way. I went to an decent liberal arts college in the midwest and did well and like you, have a good job, home, etc.

I think it's the extreme competitive climate of DC. Sometimes in my head I start going over high school and thinking, why didn't I try harder? It was a different era, OP.

I know this is ridiculous but can’t get it out of my head. I work with people who attended world class universities and while I went to an okay liberal arts college, wish I had tried harder in high school to get into a better one. I was depressed and under enormous pressure as a teenager and stopped trying, and got rejected from most schools I applied to. I’m now in a career I love but still wonder if those college years could have been more enjoyable at a better school, that I missed out and am somehow how less worthy than those who did get in.

Most everything else in my life has turned out well. This just rankles me. I know it’s silly.