Anonymous wrote:What!? I always put my cloth napkin on my plate when done. This is usually in a restaurant or other place not at a personal residence

But even if I am eating thanksgiving dinner at my in-laws, I wouldn’t think NOT to do that, unless I’m usually not signaling I am “done” or I’m saving the napkin for the dessert course.

Take an etiquette class. Napkins goes to the left of your plate when you are finished.

Anonymous wrote:They may be used to paper napkins which can be left on plates. They probably thought they were helping clean up the table.

Shouldn’t put any napkins on plates imo.

Anonymous wrote:I probably wouldn't say anything if I didn't know the kids well. Use paper next time.

Of course you never put a napkin on a dirty plate.

My DH does this and it drives me nuts, but he will fully admit has wasn’t brought up with manners like that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They may be used to paper napkins which can be left on plates. They probably thought they were helping clean up the table.

This. Please don’t think they are rude, they’re just used to a different method of clean up. This isn’t a huge deal, don’t make it one.

Surely they can think about what they're doing, and recognize a different fabric and ask "what do I do with my napkin?" or "Is it okay to put this on my plate?" or even just quietly copy what their hosts do. Hold kids to higher standards!

Sorry, I think your “standards” are too high. Kind friends cooking pasta together and sharing a meal. They sound lovely. Sounds like they feel comfortable at your house. My close friend growing up had very “proper” parents and eating at their house was always a panic-inducing event for me, because I did not grow up like they did. Which fork to use? Did I put my cup back correctly? I honestly hated eating there because it was too much.

Get some paper napkins for when the friends come, please don’t stress them out with your standards

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They may be used to paper napkins which can be left on plates. They probably thought they were helping clean up the table.

This. Please don’t think they are rude, they’re just used to a different method of clean up. This isn’t a huge deal, don’t make it one.

Surely they can think about what they're doing, and recognize a different fabric and ask "what do I do with my napkin?" or "Is it okay to put this on my plate?" or even just quietly copy what their hosts do. Hold kids to higher standards!

Anonymous wrote:What!? I always put my cloth napkin on my plate when done. This is usually in a restaurant or other place not at a personal residence

But even if I am eating thanksgiving dinner at my in-laws, I wouldn’t think NOT to do that, unless I’m usually not signaling I am “done” or I’m saving the napkin for the dessert course.

Do your inlaws do that too? If not, I think it's rude. Somebody has to handle that food-encrusted napkin and perhaps apply stain remover. Dabbing your mouth doesn't create the same mess.

Thanks! I don't have a lot of formal etiquette, which is why I wanted to check. But they are kids still learning so I may give a suggestion when they eat here again (I probably would say nothing to an adult). We use dark colors, no lasting harm done.

They all made a pasta dish together, which was super cute.

What!? I always put my cloth napkin on my plate when done. This is usually in a restaurant or other place not at a personal residence

But even if I am eating thanksgiving dinner at my in-laws, I wouldn’t think NOT to do that, unless I’m usually not signaling I am “done” or I’m saving the napkin for the dessert course.

Anonymous wrote:They may be used to paper napkins which can be left on plates. They probably thought they were helping clean up the table.

This. Please don’t think they are rude, they’re just used to a different method of clean up. This isn’t a huge deal, don’t make it one.

They may be used to paper napkins which can be left on plates. They probably thought they were helping clean up the table.

My kids get black cloth napkins for this reason. The kind restaurants use.

They may not be used to cloth napkins. Next time, just use paper napkins or paper towels.

I probably wouldn't say anything if I didn't know the kids well. Use paper next time.

Of course you never put a napkin on a dirty plate.

Absolutely not.

My teen had friends over for lunch at our house this weekend, and I was surprised two of the kids left their cloth napkins in their plates when finished. I obviously launder napkins after use, but I don't typically have to rinse thick sauce out of them first.

They're teens, so as an adult I might say something when they next come for food. But to check, first - do you ever put cloth napkins in your plate? Is there etiquette on this that I might not know?