Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have high resources, send your kid to private school.

This.

Signed,

MCPS parent who went to a big three but can’t afford that for my own kids

Do you feel like your own Big3 experience was worth it then? What was the benefit and ultimate impact?

I mean that as an honest question.

Yes, it was worth it. I'm an attorney. Dual feds. 50k per year for high school tuition isn't in the cards for us, but I still feel like I am a reasonably successful person.

My kids seem to be getting good STEM educations, but they are not learning how to write anything other than AP exam essays. My youngest just finished eleventh grade. He has taken the highest level English classes available to him - all honors and AP. He has taken several AP history/government classes. Yet he had yet to write a single paper until June of this year. Their AP English teacher had them write a five or six page research paper after the AP exam was done. He had no clue how to go about doing so. He insisted it was getting along fine so I didn't helicopter. He got a C. Explained after the fact he just didn't understand how to write something longer than a page or two. My older kid is at a Catholic college with a bunch of kids who went to Catholic high schools. Did very poorly in freshman English.

No way would I put up with MCPS high school if I could afford private for them. Well, if I'd known how I'd feel, maybe I would have sacrificed home equity/college/retirement savings for private high school. Now it's too late. But if you have plenty of money? Private is no brainer.

Anonymous wrote:Act like you aren't - if you're a high-resource family.

They have a summer job. Ideally they find it themselves. They don't have their own car, they have a car they use with your permission. They aren't given a lot of cash so they learn to prioritize. They have responsibilities at home - mundane, necessary chores everyone faces. They are celebrated for reaching goals, some other than academic. They gain a healthy perspective by appreciating other areas of the country that aren't as privileged.

All this. Coming from a high-resource family, your kid is going to be fine. Lay off the unnecessary pressures (unless they’re actually asking for tutors and other enrichment) and just let them be a kid. Everyone will be happier in the long run.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have high resources, send your kid to private school.

This.

Signed,

MCPS parent who went to a big three but can’t afford that for my own kids

Do you feel like your own Big3 experience was worth it then? What was the benefit and ultimate impact?

I mean that as an honest question.

Can we please stick to what OP asked for? She is saying she doesn't want to do private. So sick of private school hacks taking over every MCPS thread.

None of the above. My child is gifted and doesn't want / need tutors. Might be a different story at TJ.

What I do is find opportunities for him to stand out - medical conference this summer. Sports tryouts and camps with coaches and schools he's interested in. College coach.

Anonymous wrote:Most of it is actually free or low cost.

Have your child build relationships with their teachers. If they have any accommodations, they should send an email as soon as they have their schedule. My kids always start a class with a hello and thank the teacher as they leave the room. Participate in class discussions. This is how you stand out and stay engaged in a large class. In addition, every teacher my kids had offered help sessions during advisory or lunch. Some even after school. Take advantage.

Work on study skills and organization. Some schools offer a course on this if your child has a disability. For kids without, MC had a great summer course years ago. Alternatively, if your child works well with you, teach these skills yourself. The shortcoming of MCPS is these skills are not explicitly taught to most kids.

Teach your child to self-advocate. They should be comfortable reaching out to teachers and counselors if they hit a bump in the road.

Hire a tutor at the first sign of struggle. We had the best luck with MCPS teachers who tutor on the side since they know the curriculum.

Emphasize to your child to check online for assignments and missing work daily.

I think this person is closest to correct—being a helpful engaged student in the class is probably most important. In my experience, the college counselor stuff is a racket and will just mold your child into a very obvious packaged product. Here’s some of the things we spent money on that were useful and successful—
— technology. We got my kid a good laptop and an iPad. They could take notes on their iPad which they could color code and save in OCR format so they were searchable and impossible to lose. Good laptop was key for tech courses—you literally can’t do some of the advanced coursework on the McPS chromebooks.
— supporting extracurriculars. For instance, we hired a personal coach for their sport (which actually almost everyone in their position does). Kid was not a recruited athlete but this did make it possible for them to play the whole four years as a varsity athlete. Kid also had a club they were very involved in — club couldn’t get it together to go to a particular competition, so we just paid to send kid on their own. Another year, when my kid was running the club, we fronted the money for the club to participate in a big competition and individual kids paid us back for their part—running the expense through MCPS was incredible bureaucracy and this allowed the club to participate and saved our kid countless hours trying to manage the McPS bureaucracy.

We also did little things like just ordered extra copies of books for home use, where that would be helpful.

OP, how are your child’s executive function skills? We hired an executive function tutor, and it has been really valuable to our child.

Anonymous wrote:Act like you aren't - if you're a high-resource family.

They have a summer job. Ideally they find it themselves. They don't have their own car, they have a car they use with your permission. They aren't given a lot of cash so they learn to prioritize. They have responsibilities at home - mundane, necessary chores everyone faces. They are celebrated for reaching goals, some other than academic. They gain a healthy perspective by appreciating other areas of the country that aren't as privileged.

Honestly, this is the best advice for raising resilient kids. Not hot house kids

Act like you aren't - if you're a high-resource family.

They have a summer job. Ideally they find it themselves. They don't have their own car, they have a car they use with your permission. They aren't given a lot of cash so they learn to prioritize. They have responsibilities at home - mundane, necessary chores everyone faces. They are celebrated for reaching goals, some other than academic. They gain a healthy perspective by appreciating other areas of the country that aren't as privileged.

Most of it is actually free or low cost.

Have your child build relationships with their teachers. If they have any accommodations, they should send an email as soon as they have their schedule. My kids always start a class with a hello and thank the teacher as they leave the room. Participate in class discussions. This is how you stand out and stay engaged in a large class. In addition, every teacher my kids had offered help sessions during advisory or lunch. Some even after school. Take advantage.

Work on study skills and organization. Some schools offer a course on this if your child has a disability. For kids without, MC had a great summer course years ago. Alternatively, if your child works well with you, teach these skills yourself. The shortcoming of MCPS is these skills are not explicitly taught to most kids.

Teach your child to self-advocate. They should be comfortable reaching out to teachers and counselors if they hit a bump in the road.

Hire a tutor at the first sign of struggle. We had the best luck with MCPS teachers who tutor on the side since they know the curriculum.

Emphasize to your child to check online for assignments and missing work daily.

Where can we find a college counselor?

DP. Where can I find a good writing tutor? I checked some tutoring websites but wasn't sure how to find the good ones...

If you are interested in admission to the most selective colleges, hire a full service college counselor now - one of the ones who helps with setting a course through classes and ECs

A good tutor in subjects you kid is meh in will do wonders. It's expensive but worth it if you find the right ones.

Tutors? Computers of a certain type? Software? Organization / planning hacks?

What can I do do help my child succeed and thrive in high school? I am concerned about huge class sizes and limited personal attention. Since we are not paying for private, I am happy to help DC out as much as I can in other ways.

TIA!