31? You are a baby. I wish someone told me at 31 that being single was far better than being in a bad relationship. You have nothing to worry about.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Bumping this. Thank you all for the advice a couple of weeks ago. It's become increasingly clear that being single is the only way forward!

I’d hope it’s clear! Is the alternative to stay in a bad relationship and find yourself single at 41 or 51 after having let the bad go to worse for years? No thanks! You’re still young and have lots of life left in front of you. How do you want to live it?

Anonymous wrote:I think I need to become single at 31 for reasons I don't want to rehash here. Give me hope, please. All of my friends in the 30-32 age range are still single as well, so I didn't think it was that weird but to hear people here tell it, it means I'd die alone. Better to be in an unhappy relationship at 31 or single?

People seem to get this wrong a lot, but it is always better to be single than in a bad relationship. Always.

It is always better to be single than in an unhappy relationship.

There are more single women in their 30s than men. So of course some women who are looking will inevitably be single into their 40s. You need to also account for the fact that some of the men that are single in their 30s suffer from chronic unemployment, underemployment, alcoholism, drug abuse, depression and anxiety.

While you should be selective and wait for the one, exercise some flexibility because your dating pool is smaller.

I am in my 30s and single but been seeing someone for a month now. It wasn't easy. For various reasons women in their 30s claim to want a relationship which I don't disagree with but some of them have very rigid requirements and constantly bring up past trauma failed relationships in their 20s as their reasons. I get it.

Oh please you will be fine. Just take some time to recover, then date proactively but selectively.

Remember, a spinster is a woman who is so skilled at fiber arts that she achieves financial independence.

Anonymous wrote:People here are ridiculous. You won't necessarily die alone just because you'll be single in your early 30's. Wouldn't you rather be single than be with someone who's not working out anyway?

Yes. Almost every 30-32yo I know is unmarried. Some are in relationships but across the board they tend to be unmarried. Men this age are just starting to think about marriage.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think I need to become single at 31 for reasons I don't want to rehash here. Give me hope, please. All of my friends in the 30-32 age range are still single as well, so I didn't think it was that weird but to hear people here tell it, it means I'd die alone. Better to be in an unhappy relationship at 31 or single?

Call me.

???

People here are ridiculous. You won't necessarily die alone just because you'll be single in your early 30's. Wouldn't you rather be single than be with someone who's not working out anyway?

Anonymous wrote:I think I need to become single at 31 for reasons I don't want to rehash here. Give me hope, please. All of my friends in the 30-32 age range are still single as well, so I didn't think it was that weird but to hear people here tell it, it means I'd die alone. Better to be in an unhappy relationship at 31 or single?

Call me.

People do live fulfilling lives with no man or even no kids.

OP here. Bumping this. Thank you all for the advice a couple of weeks ago. It's become increasingly clear that being single is the only way forward!

Anonymous wrote:I think I need to become single at 31 for reasons I don't want to rehash here. Give me hope, please. All of my friends in the 30-32 age range are still single as well, so I didn't think it was that weird but to hear people here tell it, it means I'd die alone. Better to be in an unhappy relationship at 31 or single?

OP, there is plenty of hope, you are still young and will not die as a spinster! (Love that word.)

But.

Do. Not. Wait. Another. Day.

Break up NOW.

It will not be easy. It will be even harder tomorrow or 6 months from now or next year.

Today is the first day of your new life. Get this mess over with, move on, and find what you are really looking for.

I divorced at 33 with two small children (4 and 6). I figured, I’d rather be alone for the rest of my life than staying in that marriage. Also, getting divorced gave me at least a shot for happiness, unlike my marriage.

Married at 35 again; this is my husband’s first marriage. Still married 16 years later, and things are going pretty good.

I think I need to become single at 31 for reasons I don't want to rehash here. Give me hope, please. All of my friends in the 30-32 age range are still single as well, so I didn't think it was that weird but to hear people here tell it, it means I'd die alone. Better to be in an unhappy relationship at 31 or single?