Anonymous wrote:Alot of parents just don't want to admit that overscheduling exists or how bad it is for kids

+1.

Alot of parents just don't want to admit that overscheduling exists or how bad it is for kids

Anonymous wrote:I think that I just don't understand why kids at earlier and earlier ages would even want organized sports over free play? The few activities I did were great and fun, but I would never have wanted them over free play or hang out time with friends.

I also don’t get the need for young elementary school kids to join club sports..

I do agree that a lot of this craziness is because of the college admissions game. I know several kids who either burned out got injured and never played again. Common sense dictates that humans get tired/bored of the same repetitive activities/things.

Anonymous wrote:I think that I just don't understand why kids at earlier and earlier ages would even want organized sports over free play? The few activities I did were great and fun, but I would never have wanted them over free play or hang out time with friends.

+1. None of my 4 kids preferred organized sports over free play.. ever!

My kids love being busy and scheduled in their chosen activity. It is a grind for us but these years are short. By HS, we hope the driving to various club activities will be all but gone.

Anonymous wrote:I think that I just don't understand why kids at earlier and earlier ages would even want organized sports over free play? The few activities I did were great and fun, but I would never have wanted them over free play or hang out time with friends.

I guess it depends on your kid. My 5-year-old loves organized sports, but he's the youngest and has been watching older siblings play all his life; now that he gets to play, he feels like he's arrived. The kid packs his bag with water bottles and snacks the night before and gets there early to do "warm-ups."

I think that I just don't understand why kids at earlier and earlier ages would even want organized sports over free play? The few activities I did were great and fun, but I would never have wanted them over free play or hang out time with friends.

Anonymous wrote:"Payne, who also wrote the book Simplicity Parenting, argues that if you can hold off on organized sports until age 11 or 12, it allows your child “that whole learning window for creativity, resilience, negotiation, the things they learn during unstructured play.” Starting competitive sports early can interrupt the social-emotional learning development that comes from play, he explains, and they don’t even pay off the way most families think they will. “For children who start competitive sports before age 13, the dropout rate is 70 percent,” says Lancaster."

I can't imagine starting organized baseball, soccer, or hockey until 11 or 12. If a child waited until then, they would have zero chance of playing any of those sports in our high school sports.

As a kid in the '90s my parents tried to enroll me in soccer for the first time in 6th grade. I had begged and begged because all my friends seemed to be in organized sports and I wasn't. It was an absolutely miserable experience. My teammates made so much fun of me for how little I knew. I didn't continue. I don't remember the coach being a factor either way.

But my 6th grader has a teammate who is new to rec softball on her team who is doing great and having fun. Natural athlete and the team is warm and welcoming. So it can be done. Will this girl play in high school? Probably not, but hopefully she's going to continue with rec. She's not the only one her age new to the league, either.

Playing in high school isn't the only thing sports are good for.

"Payne, who also wrote the book Simplicity Parenting, argues that if you can hold off on organized sports until age 11 or 12, it allows your child “that whole learning window for creativity, resilience, negotiation, the things they learn during unstructured play.” Starting competitive sports early can interrupt the social-emotional learning development that comes from play, he explains, and they don’t even pay off the way most families think they will. “For children who start competitive sports before age 13, the dropout rate is 70 percent,” says Lancaster."

I can't imagine starting organized baseball, soccer, or hockey until 11 or 12. If a child waited until then, they would have zero chance of playing any of those sports in our high school sports.

I think HS sports teams should have to abide by the state regulations for teen jobs. When our teens got a work permit, issued by the state, there were many safeguards to protect them. Couldn't be expected to work more than X hours a week. Couldn't be expected to work more than X consecutive hours. Couldn't be expected to work later than X hour in the evening on a school night.

It doesn't resonate with me. I don't sign my kids up for activities to virtue signal to other families or to help them get an edge in college admissions. I do it because they ask/beg for it, and it brings me joy to watch them learn, grow, and make diverse friends. Also, I work. I prefer them doing all their chosen activities to hanging out at home with the nanny. They aren't hanging out with friends because their friends are all busy, too.

Our kids are in rec sports and the rule is you get to do one sport and one non-sport activity at a time. We bend it a little for extra classes and clinics and stuff, but generally stick to it. With 3 kids it still gets to be a lot (and before people go "You knew that before you had 3 kids!" yes, we did and no, we don't expect people to shuttle our kids everywhere for us since we have 3).

That said, I know a family who almost completely opted out of the grind - way more than we did. Kids really didn't do non-school extracurriculars. Their oldest just graduated high school with all sorts of honors and is going to W&M in the honors program there. They did all sorts of cool things as a family and their kids developed really diverse and unique interests. Instead of the activities grind they just did things they liked as a family.

I often wonder if our family would be happier doing that, or if we like our activities the way they are. My kids really enjoy their sports and instruments the way they have them. Do they occasionally wish we could say, see more museums or state parks on the weekends? A bit - but not enough that I think they'd want to entirely opt out of their schedule.

Where we are located in our neighborhood makes free-ranging it kind of hard. We just don't have enough kids close enough.

I think that this is a big problem with kids/teens that nobody wants to acknowledge. I get parents want to keep their kids safe and out of trouble and off screens, but overscheduling isn't the answer. Kids/teens free play/hangout time with friends. They need to learn to be bored and entertain themselves. Honestly, a more free range childhood is seriously underrated. And I'm not saying that there is anything wrong with youth sports, IF the child wants them.

Holy sh it this resonates

This article resonates with me..

https://slate.com/life/2024/05/smartphone-children-youth-sports-activities-overscheduled.html