Teen boys do not see a future. As in no future at all.

Why on earth would they want a girlfriend ?!?

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like mine. Lots of friends , athletic, social, has a super cute date lined up for prom, but aside from a couple week thing last summer no gf and I don’t sense much interest. My dd in the other hand had gone through crushes, dating, heartbreak and reconnecting with said heartbreaker by same age

Why bother?

Boys this age in 2024 have phones. They consume social media daily, often for hours.

Social media provides friends. Social media is their companionship.

And boys are constantly warned about their toxic masculinity; how they are part of “rape culture,” merely because they have a penis.

What sane boy on social media in 2024 would WANT to have a girlfriend? (answer: few to none).

Sounds like mine. Lots of friends , athletic, social, has a super cute date lined up for prom, but aside from a couple week thing last summer no gf and I don’t sense much interest. My dd in the other hand had gone through crushes, dating, heartbreak and reconnecting with said heartbreaker by same age

what does *some* mean?

OP, my almost 18 (in Sept) rising senior son is the same way. He's an athlete, attractive, gets asked by the popular girls to homecoming/formals/prom/etc. He's a good student, funny, etc. He's never had a girlfriend and seems to have no interest. Perhaps he's had isolated physical encounters with girls (i have no way of knowing) but it's certainly nothing regular or attached to any relationship.

I really don't think he looks at porn (more than very occasionally)---we still have it locked down at home and he goes to a school that doesn't allow phones at all during the 8am to 6pm school day and he drives directly to and from school). I mean, he could be surfing when he's away from the house on the weekends but I don't think so and if he is it's not for hours at a time. He's almost never alone in his room when he's home.

He's not gay (that I know of). And we would be fine with that--have never indicated anything through word or action or any part of our lives that we would bat an eye at this.

I think he's just a late bloomer in this regard. It's kind of odd when I think about it.

Why is your 17 year old son telling you he doesn’t want to have sex? How is that conversation starting?

I’d think he’s gay and just not there yet in exploring it.

My son was a late bloomer - sounds a lot like your son. He started dating his Sophomore year of college and is now happily living with his GF of 4 years, soon to be fiancé. I had the same thoughts as you, but don't sweat it - my son was a relationship guy and treated all his girlfriends really well (took them on dates/paid/thoughtful/no games). I'm proud of him for that and being able to commit once he found the right one.

He may not be straight but hasn't figured it out yet. He may be asexual or demisexual. He may be pulling a fast one on you and he's hooking up without dating. Or maybe he just has zero interest in a relationship

He does not want a gf. He just wants someone to have sex with. I see no problem there

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If he has p0rn access, this is the new normal.

I'm not sure agree. Access to porn only made me want the real thing more when I was that age.

Having a finite stack of magazines or 10 second clips over dial up is not the same as infinite access to infinitely variable satisfaction.

OP, is/was your DS a late bloomer (in terms of puberty) by chance?

Anonymous wrote:If he has p0rn access, this is the new normal.

I'm not sure agree. Access to porn only made me want the real thing more when I was that age.

If he has p0rn access, this is the new normal.

I would think "thank God" if it were my son.

Son is an all-around normal kid, social, lots of friends, many smart/cute girls who like him. He's straight and has gone out with girls who have asked him out, but he keeps it to "friend dates" and says he has no interest in physical intimacy or any relationship beyond friends. Is that normal for *some* boys at that age? I'm quite surprised.