Anonymous
04/11/2024 15:32
Subject: What does hosting a baby shower entail?
How much was the brunch?
Anonymous
04/11/2024 09:11
Subject: What does hosting a baby shower entail?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I’ve hosted several in my home - both bridal and baby. Mid Afternoon time slot, light and healthy foods served buffet on my dining room table, plus desserts. Modest decorations and flowers. A few games and of course gift opening.
I’ve been to some crazy ones at restaurants that were OTT and I don’t know why people put that pressure on themselves or if the guest of honor is applying the pressure but it’s ridiculous.
Did you ask guests to contribute momentarily to the food/drink at your home?
Absolutely not! On some occasions a second friend would “co-host” with me and help but guests were never asked to do anything!
Anonymous
04/11/2024 08:43
Subject: What does hosting a baby shower entail?
I once received a bill for $95 after attending a surprise party. As a pregnant vegetarian I basically ate steamed broccoli while alcohol was flowing for everyone else indulging in the buffet. I had also chipped in for a big group gift.
I'm sure my friend who the party was thrown for would be mortified if she knew. I actually would not have minded so much if it was phrased as "let's all chip in to throw Gina a party!" and I knew in advance. But getting a request afterward felt icky. This was prior to the era of Venmo so the "host" wanted checks mailed.
I think it's okay to reiterate that others have offered to chip in to help and clarify how the offerer expects to handle expenses. State clearly that you don't want guests to pay to attend.
I'm sure my friend who the party was thrown for would be mortified if she knew. I actually would not have minded so much if it was phrased as "let's all chip in to throw Gina a party!" and I knew in advance. But getting a request afterward felt icky. This was prior to the era of Venmo so the "host" wanted checks mailed.
I think it's okay to reiterate that others have offered to chip in to help and clarify how the offerer expects to handle expenses. State clearly that you don't want guests to pay to attend.
Anonymous
04/11/2024 08:17
Subject: What does hosting a baby shower entail?
Hosting means paying. I would tell this friend thanks but no thanks because you aren't comfortable with your guests being asked to pay for their own meal on top of bringing a gift. If she can't afford to host at a restaurant, she can host at her home with cupcakes and finger foods (that she purchases) or pass the reins to somebody else.
Anonymous
04/11/2024 07:49
Subject: What does hosting a baby shower entail?
Anonymous wrote:I’ve hosted several in my home - both bridal and baby. Mid Afternoon time slot, light and healthy foods served buffet on my dining room table, plus desserts. Modest decorations and flowers. A few games and of course gift opening.
I’ve been to some crazy ones at restaurants that were OTT and I don’t know why people put that pressure on themselves or if the guest of honor is applying the pressure but it’s ridiculous.
Did you ask guests to contribute momentarily to the food/drink at your home?
Anonymous
04/11/2024 07:43
Subject: What does hosting a baby shower entail?
I’ve hosted several in my home - both bridal and baby. Mid Afternoon time slot, light and healthy foods served buffet on my dining room table, plus desserts. Modest decorations and flowers. A few games and of course gift opening.
I’ve been to some crazy ones at restaurants that were OTT and I don’t know why people put that pressure on themselves or if the guest of honor is applying the pressure but it’s ridiculous.
I’ve been to some crazy ones at restaurants that were OTT and I don’t know why people put that pressure on themselves or if the guest of honor is applying the pressure but it’s ridiculous.
Anonymous
04/11/2024 03:51
Subject: What does hosting a baby shower entail?
Anonymous wrote:What does hosting a baby shower entail? I've only hosted one for my sil and it was during covid so very different. Small family gathering and a larger virtual celebration- DH and I covered flowers, a nice dinner and some gifts. Grandparents and us split gift card prizes for baby shower games
I also loosely Co hosted a baby shower years ago and myself and the other co hosts paid for decorations and food/drinks. We were in our 20s and poor lol so it was very basic..
Recently attended a baby shower hosted by a good friend for another good friend. 6 of us went out to brunch and then a rooftop hang at her apartment. We later got a Venmo for brunch and alcohol. I was a little surprised - this friend comes from a billionaire family and money isn't a problem. She also offered to host and shot down any help from other friends. Myself and another friend are also pregnant and couldn't eat most of the shared apps and we didn't partake in the alcohol. We also ordered an app for our main meal. Surprising to see such a hefty Venmo AMT. If she was going to split. At least itemized alcohol for non celebratory person
I'm due in a few months and this same friend offered to host my shower. I said I didn't want something elaborate. Happy for an apt hang. Several other friends have offered to help with planning/contributing and they were all told she has a handle on it. I don't really want to invite people to this if they are going to end up paying for themselves. I'd rather pay for the shower myself and not ask guests to pay but my other pregnant friend says no it's a bad look to host yourself. At the end of the day what does hosting entail??
Tell her no to hosting yours, and tell her why. Hosting means paying.
Anonymous
04/11/2024 02:58
Subject: What does hosting a baby shower entail?
Op here
Also adding that the "host" decided on going out to brunch, picked the restaurant - which was not cheap and honestly not mindful of the small menu for a bunch of pregnant people. our friend didn't ask for anything specific - I guess it might be different had she requested this scenario or something. But this was all the host
Also adding that the "host" decided on going out to brunch, picked the restaurant - which was not cheap and honestly not mindful of the small menu for a bunch of pregnant people. our friend didn't ask for anything specific - I guess it might be different had she requested this scenario or something. But this was all the host
Anonymous
04/11/2024 02:56
Subject: What does hosting a baby shower entail?
Anonymous wrote:Guests are not asked to pay to attend a baby shower. Hosting means paying. Any hosts who asks guests to pay should be taken out back and shot.
But you are the pregnant person. Do not take on this problem. It's not yours.
I would just rather scrap the whole thing. Nothing has been planned yet which is always another issue with this friend. She thinks she's a great planner but she isn't. I felt bad for this other friends party because not essentially was what we do every other weekend - a meal out and some wine at someone's apartment. The host didn't even ask our friend anything about her pregnancy or how she was feeling. It just felt so off.
I find myself worrying about
1. Her planning this
2. Her asking guests to pay - especially when other mutual good friends have specifically offered to help host/contribute financially and they were told no
3. If she does pull this off and it's more than what we did for our friend and doesn't ask anyone to pay for mine - how horrible for our mutual friend.
I just want to shelf the entire thing.
Anonymous
04/11/2024 02:52
Subject: What does hosting a baby shower entail?
Guests are not asked to pay to attend a baby shower. Hosting means paying. Any hosts who asks guests to pay should be taken out back and shot.
But you are the pregnant person. Do not take on this problem. It's not yours.
But you are the pregnant person. Do not take on this problem. It's not yours.
Anonymous
04/11/2024 02:44
Subject: What does hosting a baby shower entail?
Anonymous wrote:Host is definitely supposed to pay. I would not let her “host” your shower.
I would just be mortified if I found out she asked guests to pay. It also makes me want to limit the guest list not that it was large to begin with.
Knowing she wants to do this or this is her idea of hosting makes me feel uncomfortable when she asks what do you want, who do you want to invite. I've already offered to pay for it and was shot down. Several friends have also reached out to join the planning committee and they were shot down.
Anonymous
04/11/2024 02:42
Subject: What does hosting a baby shower entail?
Anonymous wrote:It entails as much or as little as the host wants to do. I've been to fancy baby showers at a private room within a fancy restaurant with a professional event planner involved and personalized baby shower party favors. And I've been to baby showers at someone's house where you look at chocolate smeared in a diaper to guess what kind of chocolate it is and everyone guesses how many squares of toilet paper the pregnant person would need to go all the way around their stomach, with a cake from the grocery store that says congrats and soda and juice.
I understand that. It isn't really a question of how fancy or high brow/low brow the show is but does the host pay for food/drink/so on....
I guess technically this one was a sprinkle but still it was for a best friend that she's known for 20 years and everyone at that sprinkle she's known for 20 years or were bridesmaids so it's not an issue not paying for peripheral people.
Anonymous
04/11/2024 02:05
Subject: What does hosting a baby shower entail?
Host is definitely supposed to pay. I would not let her “host” your shower.
Anonymous
04/11/2024 01:47
Subject: What does hosting a baby shower entail?
It entails as much or as little as the host wants to do. I've been to fancy baby showers at a private room within a fancy restaurant with a professional event planner involved and personalized baby shower party favors. And I've been to baby showers at someone's house where you look at chocolate smeared in a diaper to guess what kind of chocolate it is and everyone guesses how many squares of toilet paper the pregnant person would need to go all the way around their stomach, with a cake from the grocery store that says congrats and soda and juice.
Anonymous
04/11/2024 01:35
Subject: What does hosting a baby shower entail?
What does hosting a baby shower entail? I've only hosted one for my sil and it was during covid so very different. Small family gathering and a larger virtual celebration- DH and I covered flowers, a nice dinner and some gifts. Grandparents and us split gift card prizes for baby shower games
I also loosely Co hosted a baby shower years ago and myself and the other co hosts paid for decorations and food/drinks. We were in our 20s and poor lol so it was very basic..
Recently attended a baby shower hosted by a good friend for another good friend. 6 of us went out to brunch and then a rooftop hang at her apartment. We later got a Venmo for brunch and alcohol. I was a little surprised - this friend comes from a billionaire family and money isn't a problem. She also offered to host and shot down any help from other friends. Myself and another friend are also pregnant and couldn't eat most of the shared apps and we didn't partake in the alcohol. We also ordered an app for our main meal. Surprising to see such a hefty Venmo AMT. If she was going to split. At least itemized alcohol for non celebratory person
I'm due in a few months and this same friend offered to host my shower. I said I didn't want something elaborate. Happy for an apt hang. Several other friends have offered to help with planning/contributing and they were all told she has a handle on it. I don't really want to invite people to this if they are going to end up paying for themselves. I'd rather pay for the shower myself and not ask guests to pay but my other pregnant friend says no it's a bad look to host yourself. At the end of the day what does hosting entail??
I also loosely Co hosted a baby shower years ago and myself and the other co hosts paid for decorations and food/drinks. We were in our 20s and poor lol so it was very basic..
Recently attended a baby shower hosted by a good friend for another good friend. 6 of us went out to brunch and then a rooftop hang at her apartment. We later got a Venmo for brunch and alcohol. I was a little surprised - this friend comes from a billionaire family and money isn't a problem. She also offered to host and shot down any help from other friends. Myself and another friend are also pregnant and couldn't eat most of the shared apps and we didn't partake in the alcohol. We also ordered an app for our main meal. Surprising to see such a hefty Venmo AMT. If she was going to split. At least itemized alcohol for non celebratory person
I'm due in a few months and this same friend offered to host my shower. I said I didn't want something elaborate. Happy for an apt hang. Several other friends have offered to help with planning/contributing and they were all told she has a handle on it. I don't really want to invite people to this if they are going to end up paying for themselves. I'd rather pay for the shower myself and not ask guests to pay but my other pregnant friend says no it's a bad look to host yourself. At the end of the day what does hosting entail??