Anonymous
Post 04/10/2024 22:30     Subject: High School Friends
Very normal. He will most likely reconnnect with the hs friends who share his interests/life path after college.
College is a time of intense in person bonding- normal to lose closeness with hs friends who aren't sharing the intimacy of being in a dorm together, sharing a major, all of those unique experiences to being on a college campus, etc.
The ones who stay in touch and continue to share the same values/life plan will gravitate towards each other again after college.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2024 22:17     Subject: High School Friends
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My DS is a college sophomore at an T10 and loves his experience so far. He has kept up with his high school friends so far, but I recently noticed that he appears to be starting to see some distance with some of his high school friends. This makes me a bit sad. He has gone through so much with these high school friends, COVID et al. Anyone else experiencing the same? I am close to my high school friends to this day and I really value these friendships. I wish he would make the extra effort because I think he may regret it later.


Normal. Leave him alone. For many kids at T10s or T20s or other intellectually intense schools, college is the first time they relate intellectually to a large proportion of the student body and can develop deeper friendships. For some this means HS friendships will fade in comparison.


Um... many kids find "their people" in college, regardless of what their college is ranked.
DP
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2024 22:15     Subject: High School Friends
OP, this happened to my sophomore as well. He’s hanging out much more with his new friends in college. It is kind of sad
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2024 22:13     Subject: High School Friends
Anonymous wrote:High school drama and pressures in the DMV suck and so do most of the kids and parents. My kids are all looking forward to closing this chapter and moving on to bigger and better things. If you peak in high school you really are a loser!


But not you. Not YOUR kids. You don’t suck; everyone else does.

Mmm hmm.

Anonymous
Post 04/10/2024 22:13     Subject: High School Friends
Lol, I kept talking to my DD about her HS friends and she kept gently blowing me off. For well over a year. Finally she told me they'd all started using more drugs than just weed and were deep into it. I dropped it then.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2024 22:10     Subject: High School Friends
I am noticing a lot of kids mid college are finding girlfriends and boyfriends and drifting away from high school friends. Some of these seem marriage material, too.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2024 22:09     Subject: High School Friends
OP, how many of your HS friends are you still in touch with?

The reality is people grow and change. My kids (a freshman and junior) each have a couple of kids they see when they are hone, but definitely not the whole crowd they used to hang with. Junior visits college friends in other states ovet the summer and travels with college friends for spring break and part of winter break.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2024 22:04     Subject: High School Friends
High school drama and pressures in the DMV suck and so do most of the kids and parents. My kids are all looking forward to closing this chapter and moving on to bigger and better things. If you peak in high school you really are a loser!
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2024 21:59     Subject: High School Friends
Anonymous wrote:My DS is a college sophomore at an T10 and loves his experience so far. He has kept up with his high school friends so far, but I recently noticed that he appears to be starting to see some distance with some of his high school friends. This makes me a bit sad. He has gone through so much with these high school friends, COVID et al. Anyone else experiencing the same? I am close to my high school friends to this day and I really value these friendships. I wish he would make the extra effort because I think he may regret it later.


Normal. Leave him alone. For many kids at T10s or T20s or other intellectually intense schools, college is the first time they relate intellectually to a large proportion of the student body and can develop deeper friendships. For some this means HS friendships will fade in comparison.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2024 21:29     Subject: High School Friends
They may drift apart for a few years but then come back together
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2024 21:25     Subject: High School Friends
My son is still tight with his HS friends. They all look forward to seeing each other on breaks, though they graduate from college this spring and then they’ll be spread across the country.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2024 21:16     Subject: High School Friends
My DC’s high school friends, even those he’d had for a decade plus, gradually cut off contact with him with the justification “it’s college, people drift apart.” It’s been years and he still talks about he much he misses them…
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2024 21:11     Subject: High School Friends
I definitely grew apart from my high school friends. I think some people are able to keep in touch longer (especially if you end up living in the same area). My daughter is planning a gap year - and now that I think about it, I wonder if she is partially motivated to do the gap year because she is afraid of being away from her close friends (most will either stay local or be taking a gap year as well).
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2024 21:09     Subject: High School Friends
My DD is only close to a very small group (3 or 4) of her old high school friends. Once you go to college, it's completely normal to grow apart from many high school friends.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2024 20:48     Subject: High School Friends
My DS is a college sophomore at an T10 and loves his experience so far. He has kept up with his high school friends so far, but I recently noticed that he appears to be starting to see some distance with some of his high school friends. This makes me a bit sad. He has gone through so much with these high school friends, COVID et al. Anyone else experiencing the same? I am close to my high school friends to this day and I really value these friendships. I wish he would make the extra effort because I think he may regret it later.