I wish I knew how people perceived me.
One person I know and trust (and is a LMHC) told me I’m mindful.
Whatever that means?

[quote=Anonymous]I am constantly amazed whenever I discover people don’t have the exact same opinion I do.[/quote]

Lol. I get it but mostly I am surprised when someone else doesn't understand how on God's green earth I don't have their same opinion.

I think about this a lot.

First, I started noticing that others don't have a perceptive idea of their own outward persona. One of many examples: my friend who always back-handed hit my upper arm when something... tickled her fancy or whatever. Like in a group conversation at a party, "Oh! Hahaha!!" SMACK, "Did you hear that, that's hilarious!" One occasion, I laughed along with her but also said something like haha OMG stop hitting me hahaha (after many whacks that night). She was so offended and confused. She really seemed to not even be aware of her habit... habit isn't even the right word. More like her intrinsic way of interacting with those around her.

Ever since that experience, I've started noticing that sometimes other people have NO CLUE how they present themselves. Which makes me think I'm probably just like them.

I’ve had a bunch of people say to me “you’re not just a pretty face.” So apparently I come across as a ditz at first and then people think I’m intelligent.

I also have been told I’m good at networking and charismatic. But I didn’t know that because I thought it came easily to everyone, but I was only watching people who were better and more senior than me.

At work I am always described as calm and level headed which is funny to my loved ones because I am an anxious wreck in real life. I'm just good at my job.

Anonymous wrote:Yes. I realized that people thought I was "crazy" and "weird," largely because I overshared and was very excitable. I spent years being hurt over this and thinking hard about how to change so I don't act that way, but nothing worked except to stop caring and focus on myself. That's all it took. I say to myself now "I'm focusing on myself" whenever I think of how I come across to a lot of people. I can't change myself overnight but my hope is that this attitude will somehow slowly reflect in my behavior.

Wait, why would anyone say such a thing? That sounds like drama on their part, or that you live in an area with too many mean girls.

I am very well-liked by everyone I meet.

Yes. I realized that people thought I was "crazy" and "weird," largely because I overshared and was very excitable. I spent years being hurt over this and thinking hard about how to change so I don't act that way, but nothing worked except to stop caring and focus on myself. That's all it took. I say to myself now "I'm focusing on myself" whenever I think of how I come across to a lot of people. I can't change myself overnight but my hope is that this attitude will somehow slowly reflect in my behavior.

Yes, people think I'm far more organized, ambitious, and productive than I actually am. But I'll take it. I think I'm just very efficient and I don't waste my time on some things other people do but people seem to think I'm like the Energizer Bunny all day long and that's so not true.

I assume people dislike me, always.

Yes, in both directions - good and bad.

Anonymous wrote:I am constantly amazed whenever I discover people don’t have the exact same opinion I do.

This is common among DCUM posters, I've found

Why does it surprise you? People have such varied backgrounds and experiences, of course they have a broad variety of opinions.

I am constantly amazed whenever I discover people don’t have the exact same opinion I do.

It's nice when you find out people like you

Something happened at work recently that made me realize that people like me.

I don’t have low self-esteem, but if I had thought about it, I would have said a few people dislike me (this is still true; sometimes my job is perceived as making other people’s jobs harder and no one likes that). For the rest, I would have said they find me a generally pleasant colleague but that’s it.

But their response to this recent event made me realize they must like me. I can’t really say this in person so I’m putting it here because I feel so good about it.

I’m lucky enough to work with smart, kind, passionate people, so it feels like such a big compliment!