Anonymous wrote:There is at least one family at our school on financial aid who attends fundraisers but does not donate despite having a second home. Which of course raises the question of why they are getting aid in the first place? One would think they would give something but I guess they figure paying for tickets is their contribution.

How do you know they are on FA?

Anonymous wrote:Since when did classiness depend on how well of a panhandler you are. When did the noble industry of education become so dang greasy.

This dynamic is definitely not new!

Since when did classiness depend on how well of a panhandler you are. When did the noble industry of education become so dang greasy.

We're on 90% FA and do not attend because we can't afford it. We give a small amount to the annual fund because participation seems most important here.

There is at least one family at our school on financial aid who attends fundraisers but does not donate despite having a second home. Which of course raises the question of why they are getting aid in the first place? One would think they would give something but I guess they figure paying for tickets is their contribution.

Anonymous wrote:We get 30% aid, and my vote is no — I don’t want to go. I’d feel ridiculous spending $$$$ on an auction event no matter how fun it looks. I know we could just socialize, but it still feels uncomfortable to me.

We do not get aid but I have seen some families there that I think may receive aid (based on comments they have made) and I think it is nice they attend. It is a community event as well as being about raising money and their attendance/ticket purchase goes to the school.

Anonymous wrote:We’re full pay and we don’t go to these events. Because we hate them. You don’t have to unless you enjoy them, and if you do enjoy them then go regardless of your FA status.

We just give a donation when the school sends the first solicitation email out in the fall (and participation often matters as much as $ amount for those, so if you can give a little there, that’s great), and call it done.

FYI - this is a good strategy on the first solicitation to be left alone by development office. But note that the donation you are referring to is a different bucket than what the OP is talking about. You are referring to the school's annual campaign (this is the school's priority - especially on participation rates - so it's good you give). The OP is referring to the fundraiser event - which is separate - so you might want to consider donating to that too (even if it is token).

We’re full pay and we don’t go to these events. Because we hate them. You don’t have to unless you enjoy them, and if you do enjoy them then go regardless of your FA status.

We just give a donation when the school sends the first solicitation email out in the fall (and participation often matters as much as $ amount for those, so if you can give a little there, that’s great), and call it done.

Which schools have black tie galas?!

Anonymous wrote:We get 30% aid, and my vote is no — I don’t want to go. I’d feel ridiculous spending $$$$ on an auction event no matter how fun it looks. I know we could just socialize, but it still feels uncomfortable to me.

Lots of people go and don't spend money on auction items. That said, the ticket itself is expensive. It's ok not to go. We know families that never went.

A win-win would be to not attend (if you don't want to go) and then donate a small amount of money.

We get 50% and do not attend the big gala. Tickets this year were $200/each and it was black tie (which meant we would have to buy or rent outfits), which put the one-time event out of our budget. We attend anything that is low/no additional cost like grade level mixers or other parent events.

At our kids’ private ES, where we also received 50%, we attended all fundraisers because the ticket cost was much, much lower and the vibe was more casual.

No

You go and you make a token donation. Big donors want to see participation and enthusiasm. It's not the dollar amount that matters.

We get 80% aid and attend.

We get 30% aid, and my vote is no — I don’t want to go. I’d feel ridiculous spending $$$$ on an auction event no matter how fun it looks. I know we could just socialize, but it still feels uncomfortable to me.