This decision does not need to be about a cousin's child ... that's distant. If you can see family you'd like to see, at another time, do that.

Anonymous wrote:If they dont consider you close enough to invite your whole family unit then youre not close enough to mind you not attending.

This. Easy.

If they dont consider you close enough to invite your whole family unit then youre not close enough to mind you not attending.

Anonymous wrote:I think I would lean towards letting my DH make the final decision but I feel like if they said no kids, it’s not rude to decline.

I’d let my spouse decide as well. But I 100% know that would mean we’re going. A cousin’s kid is a close relative in that family.

DH should make the final decision but depending on the ages of your kids if you wanted to try to do both you could vacation at the wedding location and leave your kids in the hotel room for the wedding.

Skip the wedding, send a nice gift and enjoy your long weekend.

I think I would lean towards letting my DH make the final decision but I feel like if they said no kids, it’s not rude to decline.

Your husband’s cousins kid is getting married? You can just decline the invitation. It is not a summons. Send a nice gift and a thoughtful note. Express regret that you cannot make the wedding. Then go on your vacation.

I confused. Do you mean skip the wedding and go on a trip to the place where the wedding is? Yes, arguably rude. But how old are your kids and how many are there? One 10 year old, and people won't understand -- five children under 6, including a pair of twins, and perhaps they will.

If the trip is to somewhere else, not the same place as the wedding, then yeah, go ahead and go on the trip.

If they slid no kids, it is fine to decline. You should not have find a stranger to watch them.?It’s rude to be be angry at people who won’t travel without kids or hire strangers to watch them.

Where’s the wedding?
It’s not rude to decline if they say no kids.

If you have plans, you have plans. Send a lovely gift and your regrets.

Rude

I think you could say you had already made plans to be away someplace else (even if they're just tentative plans).

But, is it possible to craft a 4 day weekend around thr wedding? Only participate in the wedding itself (and get a hotel sitter or some other local child care). But spend Friday / Sunday / Monday doing fun family things?

DH's extended family is very close. A cousin's child is getting married in the fall and the wedding happens to fall over a rare 4 day weekend for my kids. We'd planned on taking a long weekend trip together as family when the wedding invite arrived.

The dilemma - wedding is adults only. Can we skip the wedding and still go on a trip or would that be rude?