If your kid isn't playing against strong competition she'll be in for a ride awakening trying out for ECNL. You can be as skilled as possible; but if you aren't used to playing with and against high caliber players most melt or find themselves struggling to catch up. There are plenty of good coaches at higher levels. Do a lot of IDing and see if anytime is a better fit.

My DDs coach told us to move on when we had this conversation. He said he had planned to call us that week and suggest that based on her ability and goals, she needed a more advanced team. I know a few coaches who I believe would do the same. I don't think he will be surprised and if he cares like you say, he may even pick up the phone and help you out or at least make suggestions of clubs that will suit her.

You get better when you play with better players. Move now.

You are your DD’s chief advocate. You can’t worry about her current coach’s feelings and plans. If she is ready (expressed interest and skill-wise), then at least look at options. If she is talented, the larger clubs will take her now or….when you’re ready to make the transition.

Make the change by U13. Until then, make sure she is exposed to the highest level of play in training, camp, clinics, etc.

For a pre-ECNL player whose goal is to play on a girls ECNL team, for how long would you stick with a good coach at a small club who has been effective developing DD but whose roster is very thin? Coach has been great for DD but her teammates and opposing players (NCSL) no longer provide her much of a challenge. My instinct is to move to an ECNL club next season, but I’m reluctant to leave a coach who really seems invested in DD’s development. She is happy where she is but also wants to see what options she might have.