Would it help you to write it and hand her a piece of paper instead of telling her out loud? I'd suggest you think about what reaction you WANT from her and then get honest with yourself and think about what reaction you'll GET from her. If you're not prepared for the latter, don't tell her now.

Talk to your therapist about how you feel about telling or not telling your mom. That's kind of a different topic than just talking about the abuse itself. Hopefully your therapist can help you navigate through the stress of being that open with your mom and how it might go. Try not to be afraid to tell your therapist anything, that's not going to help things at all.

Why do you need to tell her?

I think you need to seriously manage your expectations here. Your mom is likely to defend his most egregious act or refuse to believe you. Assuming that is what she will do, do you still want to tell her?

Anonymous wrote:I have been scared to talk to my therapist since opening up about this. I guess scared isn’t the right word… just anxious.

This is something that you should ask your therapist. Why are you seeing one if you feel that you need to crowdsource this? This should be something to ask her/him.

I have been scared to talk to my therapist since opening up about this. I guess scared isn’t the right word… just anxious.

Isn’t that a question for your therapist?

We have been working at repairing our relationship. She and my dad divorced a few years ago but she still defends some of his abusive actions. The problem is that she doesn’t know about a very specific case of abuse. How can I open up and tell her about it? I struggled to tell my own therapist about it.