Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If truly the only accommodation he needs is the ability to hand in assignments late when he misses class for a doctor's appointment, I don't think he needs accommodations at all. First, how often is he missing school for doctors appointments? Second, it's been my experience that if he communicates with his teachers ahead of time (which he would need to do even with an accommodation) and tells them that he has a doctor's appointment on Monday so can he hand in the assignment on Tuesday, 99% will say yes.

The above has definitely not been our experience - many old school teachers would refuse to extend the assignment. Their attitude would be - you knew you had this appointment and it's your job to plan around it, and/or you should have asked a friend what the assignment was and completed it.

Many kids with anxiety have therapy appointments at least once a week. These appointments are extremely difficult to get after school so many have to go during school. By the time you add in driving back and forth, the appointment block can be 3 hours. Then there is the fact that therapy sometimes leaves one emotional exhausted and still thinking about what was discussed in therapy - not great for your ability to focus. And, some kids will have periods of worsening when they do therapy more than 1x a week.

Would you insist that a kid leaving school after lunch one day a week for kidney dialysis not have an accommodation?

The point is getting the accommodation plan for the kid with a kidney disorder. Parents need to advocate for their kid. As for a child who is asking for extended time for the homework due date every week because go weekly therapy that is obviously not sustainable and I would hope that the parent reaches out to the therapist lets them know what's going on, and also strategies on how to help their child get the work done. In high school, college, or most jobs you can't get accommodations because of attending therapy (sadly). So if this is happening, this Childs support group will need to come up with a plan to where the kid learns and grows to be able to eventually do it. Anxiety is common, but I have never heard it being a learning difference. At the same time if a kid was exhausted after therapy and its not common if explained to the teachers I would expect them to understand if its communicated.

Have the moderator move this to the Special Needs Parenting Forum - it really doesn't fit here and won't get the right people responding.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most privates do not extend assignment due dates.

I do not believe this is legal. Even private schools have to comply with the ADA. Private schools may have a policy of extending dates only after negotiation with a teacher, but that's a crappy way to handle things - you are forcing the kid to frequently navigate at a power disadvantage, which is demoralizing. And, you are putting a person who is unqualified at disability decision-making (not legally qualified and frequently not educationally qualified because they have no or little understanding of disability) in charge of disability decision-making - that is a recipe for conflict and institutional legal liability.

For homework? I think it is legal unless stated in the accommodation plan that the student is granted extended time for homework. It is more common to see extended time for map testing, quizzes, and test. What I know, if the student advocated for themselves by going to the teacher or emailing the teacher explaining why they need extended time on a certain homework assignment it tends to go well (unless student is asking multiple teachers and frequently). This is because schools love to see students learn how to advocate for themselves and tend to accept it. I went to a private school, when I or my friends advocated and asked for extended time on homework assignments it was almost always granted unless there was a time crunch for report cards or moving to the next unit.

Anonymous wrote:Most privates do not extend assignment due dates.

No, but if a student advocates and lets a teacher know in advanced they need more time from attending a private school myself and having ADHD and dyslexia, it normally gets granted. Of course not asking for extended time all the time, but if a student advocates they should expect a response pretty soon of what to expect from teacher due to small class sizes. It is important to keep plans for learning differences throughout school. As it can be harder if you don't have any proof of prior plans in school to get extended time for tests and finals in college, and then being granted for accommodations for ACT and SAT. Just makes more sense to continue advocating for your child to get the accommodations to set them up for success (especially during the tween/teen years were friendships more drama starts and hormones).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Huge +1 for thinking about college admission tests. It will be far easier to start the process for that now, rather than junior year.

He tests fine. He has never needed a testing accommodation. I would say that the anxiety is more pervasive than the ADHD. In public we don't have many if any accommodations that address the anxiety. What would be some accommodations that we should look out for in HS, ICE?

I think the first poster made some great points about transition periods and now I'm second guessing.

I'm the first poster.

Accommodations to address anxiety would depend very much on the parameters of anxiety - some kids get flash passes to nurse or counselor if they need a moment to step outside of class and breath and settle their anxiety. Some kids who are anxious about public speaking might be allowed a more scaffolded approach to a speech assignment. Some kids with slow processing might get a pre-warning before being asked the answer to a question in class. Some with social anxiety might get more care in groupwork selection. All of which could be defined by a neuropsych.

BTW, you are not getting accommodations in public school not because your kid doesn't need them but because public schools suck at accommodating any mental health need. Many of my tutorial clients have had to fight for obviously needed accoms.

Also, grades are not a measure of "not needing" accommodations. They are one piece to look at. If the anxious kid is staying up until 2 am to complete homework and losing sleep worrying over having to do X, but still getting good grades, there's a problem that might benefit from an accommodation. Again, the specific need for and type of accommodation requires asking a lot more questions and testing of the student to explore the underlying basis of anxiety and guess who is best suited to do that ..... a neuropsych or psychoed assessor.

What is there to second guess? You can afford to pay for private school, so why are you reluctant to get a full neuropsych assessment? It's not a money problem, is it? What's 4-5K on top of private school tuition for the next 4-7 years?

Why on earth would you not want the neuropsych, which is going to tell you in great detail all strengths and weaknesses. You might even find out that your kid has an underlying weakness that is causing his anxiety and that can be addressed and improved or accommodated. And you will for sure find out strengths - strengths you can build on and the kid can feel good about.

Why would you not ask for accommodations? Are you afraid it will mark him somehow - explain more? Are you afraid it will make him soft - i.e. he just needs to toughen up and get over his anxiety? are you afraid the school is lying when it says no impact to admissions?

I apologize if my tone seems pushy but I genuinely do not understand why you wouldn't get the neuropsych and ask for whatever accoms
are appropriate, especially when the school has said it will not affect admissions?

Anonymous wrote:Most privates do not extend assignment due dates.

I do not believe this is legal. Even private schools have to comply with the ADA. Private schools may have a policy of extending dates only after negotiation with a teacher, but that's a crappy way to handle things - you are forcing the kid to frequently navigate at a power disadvantage, which is demoralizing. And, you are putting a person who is unqualified at disability decision-making (not legally qualified and frequently not educationally qualified because they have no or little understanding of disability) in charge of disability decision-making - that is a recipe for conflict and institutional legal liability.

Anonymous wrote:If truly the only accommodation he needs is the ability to hand in assignments late when he misses class for a doctor's appointment, I don't think he needs accommodations at all. First, how often is he missing school for doctors appointments? Second, it's been my experience that if he communicates with his teachers ahead of time (which he would need to do even with an accommodation) and tells them that he has a doctor's appointment on Monday so can he hand in the assignment on Tuesday, 99% will say yes.

The above has definitely not been our experience - many old school teachers would refuse to extend the assignment. Their attitude would be - you knew you had this appointment and it's your job to plan around it, and/or you should have asked a friend what the assignment was and completed it.

Many kids with anxiety have therapy appointments at least once a week. These appointments are extremely difficult to get after school so many have to go during school. By the time you add in driving back and forth, the appointment block can be 3 hours. Then there is the fact that therapy sometimes leaves one emotional exhausted and still thinking about what was discussed in therapy - not great for your ability to focus. And, some kids will have periods of worsening when they do therapy more than 1x a week.

Would you insist that a kid leaving school after lunch one day a week for kidney dialysis not have an accommodation?

If truly the only accommodation he needs is the ability to hand in assignments late when he misses class for a doctor's appointment, I don't think he needs accommodations at all. First, how often is he missing school for doctors appointments? Second, it's been my experience that if he communicates with his teachers ahead of time (which he would need to do even with an accommodation) and tells them that he has a doctor's appointment on Monday so can he hand in the assignment on Tuesday, 99% will say yes.

Anonymous wrote:Most privates do not extend assignment due dates.

Definitely not true. It's nothing official, but privates encourage students to advocate for themselves and ask for flexibility if they need it.

Anonymous wrote:Huge +1 for thinking about college admission tests. It will be far easier to start the process for that now, rather than junior year.

He tests fine. He has never needed a testing accommodation. I would say that the anxiety is more pervasive than the ADHD. In public we don't have many if any accommodations that address the anxiety. What would be some accommodations that we should look out for in HS, ICE?

I think the first poster made some great points about transition periods and now I'm second guessing.

Most privates do not extend assignment due dates.

Huge +1 for thinking about college admission tests. It will be far easier to start the process for that now, rather than junior year.

I'm a tutor. Tons of kids in even the top privates have accommodation and need and use them. Anxiety and ADHD are real disorders. Your question is like, "my kid needs a wheelchair but I'm not sure he will need it in private".

Your kid can have accommodations and choose to decline to use them in any situation.

You want the accommodations in place in case your kid experiences a worsening of anxiety in HS or experiences a diminished ability to compensate in the face of increased expectations - both very common in HS.

You also want accommodations in place for SAT, AP and IB exams.

Also, sometimes the meds that helped kids manage like more typical students, and thus diminish the need for accommodations, sometimes stop working or need to be adjusted, in which case the student might have to rely more on accommodations until meds are sorted.

There are so many unknowns about how your kid will react to this transition. I would never give up accommodations at a moment of transition.

Also, grades alone are not a measure of "effect of disorder". I have met plenty of straight A kids in advanced classes who are working so hard to overcome their disability without accoms that it is making them even more depressed. They are like ducks serenely moving on the water but frantically paddling underneath to keep going. They shouldn't be forced to self-accommodate by taking less challenging classes than they are intellectually capable of just because they need extra time.

Finally, you want to maintain a history of the plan so that accommodations can also be in place in college, which is a level at which some kids compensation tools will be overwhelmed.

Our DS will be entering 9th at a private, coming from public and has maintained a 504 plan due to ADHD and Anxiety.

The only accommodation he uses infrequently is one that allows him extra time to complete makeup work when he misses school due to a doctors appointment. It reduces his anxiety since he is a perfectionist and stresses out over missing assignments and missed lectures. He does not use extended time during tests or have any other accommodations that we would consider continuing.

During admissions we had a brief conversation about 504's etc and we were told that in order to continue any accommodations we would need to get a neuropsych eval. Admission was not contingent on any eval. In terms of focus and executive function, he's more than fine as long as we have access to medication. We did experience stress/ lack of focus due to medication shortages this fall, but it did not effect grades.

I'm just not sure that he needs any accommodations in a private setting. What are accommodations like in a private setting? Anyone else BTDT?