I have a very similar kid (even cooks!) - the lack of solo training will cap their top end, but, it's probably not going to bar them from anything they want to do in the next few years.

My DS requires other people his age to do anything but I did get him to juggle eventually by learning to do it myself which drove him crazy.

Anonymous wrote:at that age, if they're not self-motivated to work on their skill on their own, then they're probably just casual players. AND there's absolutely NOTHING wrong with that. Just enjoy and love watching him play.

Your son COOKS at 13??? Mine will barely do that.

Mine rarely trained on their own, and they are a casual player. It's fine.

Anonymous wrote:My 11yo loves soccer and wants to try out for travel in May.
Posts like this make me so disheartened though. It’s crazy.

OP here - I don't mean to make you feel disheartened. I'm new to this forum, and it's overwhelming reading what folks are saying here. I just don't know enough about soccer to help him maintain his current level of confidence playing, especially as the competition seems to ramp up during the high school years.

*spatial awareness* (sorry typo)

OP here - thank you for your responses! I think he is a kid who happens to have some talent (great spacial awareness), but is very much a casual player and really just enjoys being active. Yes, I think this really describes him well.

Us parents never played sports, even at the high school level, so we have no idea what we are doing. He wanted to play more soccer, so we found a travel team. His coach left and they cut half his team, so we helped him find another travel team. The new travel team coach suggested he do this training, he wanted to do it, so we're doing it.

As for the cooking, he had to learn because we can't keep up with the 4th, 5th, and 6th meals he needs to eat each day, ha ha.

Anonymous wrote:Who is pushing the club team? the extra training? You or your kid, willing to be not your kid and he is sending you a message.

Many parents are living through their kids or they think they know what they want but the reality is....

Not OP but in a similar boat. DS has club training (ECNL) four days a week, lots of outdoor matches even through the winter, plus futsal training/games through the winter. But I am not sure he can do 30 juggles these days, and he never trains on his own, except to take shots on a small net in the backyard. He trained by himself a lot during COVID, but not anymore.

In-game, his skills look higher than almost all of his teammates, and my tendency is that he actually gets enough touches without training by himself, so he'd benefit more from weight training / sprints / etc. But I am interested in others' responses, as I have had the same question as OP.

We have never pushed anything, we've just gone along with whatever, except last summer I refused to pay for certain camps. I basically said, you should just train on your own at this point.

My 11yo loves soccer and wants to try out for travel in May.
Posts like this make me so disheartened though. It’s crazy.

He’s fine. You said he doesn’t have aspirations to play in college. He is playing for fun so keep it fun. DS has played on a wide range of teams and there is great variation in the amount of time players invest outside of formal training. Some players due to natural athleticism seem to get by with the minimum while others work really hard to keep their spot. If he isn’t sitting on the bench he has likely found a balance with his team. As he gets older, if he gets cut or doesn’t see a lot of playing time, he can make the choice to put more hours in. But it should always be his choice.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a U14 boy who plays soccer 5-6 days a week, 3 days of practice with his new club team, who he is challenged by, 1 days with a trainer, plus any actual games. His winter league is wrapping up. He will not be going pro or play in college either. But he LOVES to play soccer and will play as often as he can.

At the same time, he will do NOT do any training on his own, even just juggling. He's also a flighty 13 year old kid - I have to nag him to do his laundry and clean up after himself after he cooks, remind him of his chores, etc. when he'd rather play video games.

If he's playing soccer this often, does he also have to do drills on his own too? Is this something he needs to do to keep up? Are club players who don't run drills every day able to keep up with their team as teenagers?
(Just curious if I need help motivate him more).

I think you buried the lead here, he cooks for himself? Seriously, it sounds like he is in a good place.

Man I was just going to say this. He cooks for himself. He already plays 6 days a week, I think a day off is deserved. He is playing, his skills will continue to improve but most importantly he is actively involved in decision making almsot daily which is extremely important. If he has no desire to play at a higher level, do not push him to do more then what he desires or you run the risk of having him quit.

Who is pushing the club team? the extra training? You or your kid, willing to be not your kid and he is sending you a message.

Many parents are living through their kids or they think they know what they want but the reality is....

Anonymous wrote:at that age, if they're not self-motivated to work on their skill on their own, then they're probably just casual players. AND there's absolutely NOTHING wrong with that. Just enjoy and love watching him play.

Agree. I have one kid who sounds like OP's, and one who will happily work solo all the time.

Both are fine, just different.

Anonymous wrote:I have a U14 boy who plays soccer 5-6 days a week, 3 days of practice with his new club team, who he is challenged by, 1 days with a trainer, plus any actual games. His winter league is wrapping up. He will not be going pro or play in college either. But he LOVES to play soccer and will play as often as he can.

At the same time, he will do NOT do any training on his own, even just juggling. He's also a flighty 13 year old kid - I have to nag him to do his laundry and clean up after himself after he cooks, remind him of his chores, etc. when he'd rather play video games.

If he's playing soccer this often, does he also have to do drills on his own too? Is this something he needs to do to keep up? Are club players who don't run drills every day able to keep up with their team as teenagers?
(Just curious if I need help motivate him more).

I think you buried the lead here, he cooks for himself? Seriously, it sounds like he is in a good place.

Anonymous wrote:I have a U14 boy who plays soccer 5-6 days a week, 3 days of practice with his new club team, who he is challenged by, 1 days with a trainer, plus any actual games. His winter league is wrapping up. He will not be going pro or play in college either. But he LOVES to play soccer and will play as often as he can.

At the same time, he will do NOT do any training on his own, even just juggling. He's also a flighty 13 year old kid - I have to nag him to do his laundry and clean up after himself after he cooks, remind him of his chores, etc. when he'd rather play video games.

If he's playing soccer this often, does he also have to do drills on his own too? Is this something he needs to do to keep up? Are club players who don't run drills every day able to keep up with their team as teenagers?
(Just curious if I need help motivate him more).

It may take time for him to do things on his own. He's still young.

at that age, if they're not self-motivated to work on their skill on their own, then they're probably just casual players. AND there's absolutely NOTHING wrong with that. Just enjoy and love watching him play.

I have a U14 boy who plays soccer 5-6 days a week, 3 days of practice with his new club team, who he is challenged by, 1 days with a trainer, plus any actual games. His winter league is wrapping up. He will not be going pro or play in college either. But he LOVES to play soccer and will play as often as he can.

At the same time, he will do NOT do any training on his own, even just juggling. He's also a flighty 13 year old kid - I have to nag him to do his laundry and clean up after himself after he cooks, remind him of his chores, etc. when he'd rather play video games.

If he's playing soccer this often, does he also have to do drills on his own too? Is this something he needs to do to keep up? Are club players who don't run drills every day able to keep up with their team as teenagers?
(Just curious if I need help motivate him more).