Anonymous wrote: I just need to get this out. My heart goes out to anyone struggling and I applaud getting help, but I am processing this. I had a coworker make my life a living hell when we had to work on a project together. I was polite and professional and turned to email for any important communication so there were no misunderstandings and would have others check email to make sure it was kind and professional. She would make these paranoid accusations and even when I showed the emails, the boss (a family friend of coworker's mother) would gaslight me. She had scary mood swings and I was made to feel like I set it off even though I was making myself physically sick always trying to be calm and respectful. I got called into meetings over her dramatic meltdowns blaming me for things I didn't do. I asked to be put on a different project and I was told I had to learn to make it work. I ended up looking for other jobs, but I saw a therapist until I left and for the transition to a new job because it was so draining. I also consulted a lawyer about the situation both to keep things amicable until I left, and also to leave in the most professional way possible. So this woman cost me a lot of money as well as just completely draining me and the worst part was the gaslighting from above.

Well a former coworker clued me in that this woman was finally let go and publicly posts on social media somewhat of a diary of her mental health struggles. I read it for my own closure. She has experienced many psychiatric emergencies over the years. It has been a struggle to find the right anti-psychotic and antidepressant and she has been spiraling more often recently. I really do have empathy, but I also have resentment that she blamed me for her emotional struggles at work when I was not doing anything to her and our supervisor was useless and made me feel like I was somehow causing the problem even there was no evidence. I will get over it and I don't wish these kinds of struggles on anyone. Maybe I wish she had gone for help sooner and now I know it wasn't personal, but I felt like I was going to lose my mind if I didn't leave because there was this elephant in the room and you couldn't do anything. I know it's not something she chose.

I may take this down. Has anyone had a similar experience?

Anonymous wrote:Thank God she did not target you violently.

I have experienced this secondhand at work.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm sorry. That has to have been so hard, from the coworker raging to the supervisor gaslighting - sounds like it really sucked.

IDK if litigation is part of the issue, but supervisors are often reluctant to take action in these situations. Even if they do not think it is mental illness, but just want to make sure that there is no preception of wrongful remand or termination.

I had a coworker that everyone believed was Klinger in MASH - not the crossdressing, but trying to get laid off with disability by claiming voices, sighting UFOs, and going on at length about US military interventions. He was in a constant battle with one of the male execs. Then one day he snapped after one too many degrading requests. No one was injured nor was the coworker. In the end, I couldn't tell if he was working a con, but at the same time, still being run down by the microaggressions and disrespect by this male exec.

It could be many things - he could have thought he was smarter than he was (delusional), have personality disorders (ex: narcissism, think they are above the law) or mentally ill in other ways. But sometimes people use mental illness to poorly feign any number of things: ignorance, plausible deniability, repentance, or disingenuous claims, to name a few. Mental illness is not an excuse to attack other people, treat others poorly, harass others or worse, or certainly not an excuse to expect other people not to take action. People have every right to do what they need to do to defend themselves (and their family, if needed).

Maybe the employer had an issue with not getting sued (while accumulating evidence), but most individuals would defend themselves in a heartbeat.

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm sorry. That has to have been so hard, from the coworker raging to the supervisor gaslighting - sounds like it really sucked.

IDK if litigation is part of the issue, but supervisors are often reluctant to take action in these situations. Even if they do not think it is mental illness, but just want to make sure that there is no preception of wrongful remand or termination.

I had a coworker that everyone believed was Klinger in MASH - not the crossdressing, but trying to get laid off with disability by claiming voices, sighting UFOs, and going on at length about US military interventions. He was in a constant battle with one of the male execs. Then one day he snapped after one too many degrading requests. No one was injured nor was the coworker. In the end, I couldn't tell if he was working a con, but at the same time, still being run down by the microaggressions and disrespect by this male exec.