Is she a freshman? Things like internships, mentorships, research opportunities, career fairs, alumni connections, etc. all kick in later on. And there's still going to be competition for those, because highly selective admissions means everyone who got in is pretty much equally good (in theory, anyway).

But if she's expecting everything to be handed to her just because she had a good SAT score and worked hard in high school, she won't be first in line for those opportunities. It can be really challenging for kids who were always at the top of their classes in high school to suddenly be one among a few thousand kids just like them. And, it seems, for parents who think their super-special child deserves equally special treatment.

like ski passes and shuttle to the ski mountain?

Anonymous wrote:Often you read parents touting the vast resources at the most selective colleges, funded by multi-billion endowments and pricy tuition. Nobody ever details what those resources actually are and how often they’re used.

Our DD is at a top 10 and the only resource seems to be a boundless amount of staff who email her or forward her to another staff member, who will email her or offer to jump on a zoom, to detail things they will later email her. They don’t really offer bespoke help, they just email her copy and paste text and links into emails. Is this one example of the alleged resources?

She should learn that networking is everything. You have to build relationships to get better service. She should go in person and get to know those she's asking for help.

I applied for a Rhodes and a Marshall scholarship from a private college and there is definitely a group of students that get high-powered, 1:1 advising and mentoring. It's not broadly advertised or widely known, but absolutely happens. I had weekly meetings with the Provost to practice interview questions and the head of the honors program reviewed my course selections each semester. I met with members of the board of trustees and had frequent dinners at the university president's house. The school even hired an external consultant to advise me. From conversations with the other candidates (all from Ivies, unlike me), I understand that we all were prepped by our universities.

In short, not everyone gets the same treatment.

At top universities, students are something that gets in the way of the professors’ research agenda.

Anonymous wrote:What exactly did you expect—a personal college concierge?

If she's only getting copy and paste text and links, then she's asking basic questions whose answers can be found online or in a handbook somewhere.

She's an adult now. Nobody is going to hold her hand and walk her through the process. No matter how much you pay for the privilege.

So where does all the endowment and tuition money go? What’s the point of private college, an extremely selective private at that?

Anonymous wrote:My kids are at top 10 SLACs, and I think they have great access to the resources at their respective schools.

Define resources. More specifically the resources they personally use and which you believe are better than or unavailable at less prestigious colleges.

What exactly did you expect—a personal college concierge?

If she's only getting copy and paste text and links, then she's asking basic questions whose answers can be found online or in a handbook somewhere.

She's an adult now. Nobody is going to hold her hand and walk her through the process. No matter how much you pay for the privilege.

I went to an Ivy League school, and if forced - I would probably say the best resource was that a “good job” basically fell into my lap at graduation. I didn’t have to look hard. I barely did much research on my own and just briefly looked at who was recruiting at on campus jobs, submitted an app thru the portal and got a job pretty easily.

My kids are at top 10 SLACs, and I think they have great access to the resources at their respective schools.

Does she
Have an advisor who will proactively review her course selections, ensure she on track? (Or is the advisor non existent or hard to schedule (most colleges))
Ever email a professor or advisor indicating that a class she wants at the time she wants is booked... and a space is opened up for her?
Have the opportunity to enter a bespoke mentoring program, matched with an industry professional?
Have access to bespoke international experiences (aside from the semester study abroad that everyone else has), for example winter break in hong kong, spring break in colombia?
Ever have a professor say, if you don't have an internship lined up, just email me, we will find one for you?

Student at High Point who takes advantage of the Steak House.

OP I think this is a good question that demands some further introspection as people make these claims in 'general' terms all the time without getting into any specifics. In the past I understood it was primarily the "network" of classmates and alumni gained by attending, however that doesn't appear to be holding water these days with top corporate and public execs coming from all types of schools. Also a lot of so-called lower tiered publics have sizeable alumni networks and it appears wealthy students at the "ritzy" colleges don't interact with the middle class or Pell students. So then what makes HYPSM and other Ivy+ unique with resources? What really is the resource benefit, considering the academic backlash that is underway with places such as Harvard?

Could you give examples of what you consider ritzy colleges?

Often you read parents touting the vast resources at the most selective colleges, funded by multi-billion endowments and pricy tuition. Nobody ever details what those resources actually are and how often they’re used.

Our DD is at a top 10 and the only resource seems to be a boundless amount of staff who email her or forward her to another staff member, who will email her or offer to jump on a zoom, to detail things they will later email her. They don’t really offer bespoke help, they just email her copy and paste text and links into emails. Is this one example of the alleged resources?