Anonymous
Post 01/30/2024 12:31     Subject: Withholding sex
Not wanting to have sex is not the same as witholding. Witholding is used in a manipulative way.

Being exhausted/depressed/sick isnt manipulation.
Anonymous
Post 01/30/2024 12:30     Subject: Withholding sex
Anonymous wrote:It's funny - I just posted somewhere else and admitted that I do it when I am exhausted from doing too much at home (on top of a full-time job). It's not entirely manipulative; sometimes I am just dead tired from doing too much, and I need more help around the house, and DH listens. If we get divorced someday, I don't think it will be over this issue.

See its confusing is that considered withholding because your tired.
Anonymous
Post 01/30/2024 12:30     Subject: Withholding sex
Anonymous wrote:There are two types of women who intentionally withhold sex to try to manipulate their spouse:

- those who are divorced, and those who eventually will be divorced.


Agree 100%.

Reasonable ground for divorce.
Anonymous
Post 01/30/2024 12:28     Subject: Withholding sex
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I genuinely get triggered when I hear men complain about their wives withholding sex, as though their wives are obligated to sleep with them, no matter what, just because they got married. I've had a period of low libido and my husband accused me of manipulating him to get him to change what he was doing because I did't want to have sex. But sex wasn't even on my mind! I was just depressed! It made me so mad.

But I know there are women who use sex to get what they want. Probably more than I think, just because it's such a foreign concept to me. I think it's awful. Unless it's some agreement that they have made with their husband, like they are sex workers or something.


I’m a woman and for me it’s triggering that someone enters the monogamous institution of marriage without wanting to keep their end of the bargain. Yes, you are obligated to have sex your spouse. Otherwise, don’t get married.


If that was the deal you made when you got married, absolutely! But I never promised to have sex with my husband even when I am depressed and exhausted. I'm not obligated to do that at all and I genuinely feel sorry for people who think they are.


This i do agree with if i am not in the mood dont make me out to be a horrible wife. To me he is just immature.
Anonymous
Post 01/30/2024 12:27     Subject: Withholding sex
It's funny - I just posted somewhere else and admitted that I do it when I am exhausted from doing too much at home (on top of a full-time job). It's not entirely manipulative; sometimes I am just dead tired from doing too much, and I need more help around the house, and DH listens. If we get divorced someday, I don't think it will be over this issue.
Anonymous
Post 01/30/2024 12:26     Subject: Withholding sex
Anonymous wrote:I genuinely get triggered when I hear men complain about their wives withholding sex, as though their wives are obligated to sleep with them, no matter what, just because they got married. I've had a period of low libido and my husband accused me of manipulating him to get him to change what he was doing because I did't want to have sex. But sex wasn't even on my mind! I was just depressed! It made me so mad.

But I know there are women who use sex to get what they want. Probably more than I think, just because it's such a foreign concept to me. I think it's awful. Unless it's some agreement that they have made with their husband, like they are sex workers or something.


By that token it's not a man's responsibility to work and pay for everything even though the couple are married. Oh, wait. If he doesn't work and support the family the wife will just file for divorce and say he's a deadbeat...
Anonymous
Post 01/30/2024 12:25     Subject: Withholding sex
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I genuinely get triggered when I hear men complain about their wives withholding sex, as though their wives are obligated to sleep with them, no matter what, just because they got married. I've had a period of low libido and my husband accused me of manipulating him to get him to change what he was doing because I did't want to have sex. But sex wasn't even on my mind! I was just depressed! It made me so mad.

But I know there are women who use sex to get what they want. Probably more than I think, just because it's such a foreign concept to me. I think it's awful. Unless it's some agreement that they have made with their husband, like they are sex workers or something.


I’m a woman and for me it’s triggering that someone enters the monogamous institution of marriage without wanting to keep their end of the bargain. Yes, you are obligated to have sex your spouse. Otherwise, don’t get married.


If that was the deal you made when you got married, absolutely! But I never promised to have sex with my husband even when I am depressed and exhausted. I'm not obligated to do that at all and I genuinely feel sorry for people who think they are.
Anonymous
Post 01/30/2024 12:24     Subject: Withholding sex
Yes i agree i do feel that men not all feel they deserve sex like its almost a contract. My husband can be a little pushy with sex at times like needing it alot but i never withhild it.
Anonymous
Post 01/30/2024 12:22     Subject: Withholding sex
Anonymous wrote:I genuinely get triggered when I hear men complain about their wives withholding sex, as though their wives are obligated to sleep with them, no matter what, just because they got married. I've had a period of low libido and my husband accused me of manipulating him to get him to change what he was doing because I did't want to have sex. But sex wasn't even on my mind! I was just depressed! It made me so mad.

But I know there are women who use sex to get what they want. Probably more than I think, just because it's such a foreign concept to me. I think it's awful. Unless it's some agreement that they have made with their husband, like they are sex workers or something.


I’m a woman and for me it’s triggering that someone enters the monogamous institution of marriage without wanting to keep their end of the bargain. Yes, you are obligated to have sex your spouse. Otherwise, don’t get married.
Anonymous
Post 01/30/2024 12:21     Subject: Withholding sex
I think all of these things are true:

*Women shouldn't withhold sex to get what they want.

*Men shouldn't assume that women who don't want to have sex are withholding sex to get what they want.

*Women shouldn't have sex they don't want.

*Women should understand that marriages without sex often result in divorce.

*Men should understand that sometimes they need to do nonsexual things that are beneficial to their wife in order to create an environment more conducive to her wanting to have sex.
Anonymous
Post 01/30/2024 12:20     Subject: Withholding sex
Anonymous wrote:I genuinely get triggered when I hear men complain about their wives withholding sex, as though their wives are obligated to sleep with them, no matter what, just because they got married. I've had a period of low libido and my husband accused me of manipulating him to get him to change what he was doing because I did't want to have sex. But sex wasn't even on my mind! I was just depressed! It made me so mad.

But I know there are women who use sex to get what they want. Probably more than I think, just because it's such a foreign concept to me. I think it's awful. Unless it's some agreement that they have made with their husband, like they are sex workers or something.


I get that me and my husband dont always see eye to eye with sex!! But i dont consider it as a punishment i set. I wouldnt think he would either.
Anonymous
Post 01/30/2024 12:17     Subject: Withholding sex
I genuinely get triggered when I hear men complain about their wives withholding sex, as though their wives are obligated to sleep with them, no matter what, just because they got married. I've had a period of low libido and my husband accused me of manipulating him to get him to change what he was doing because I did't want to have sex. But sex wasn't even on my mind! I was just depressed! It made me so mad.

But I know there are women who use sex to get what they want. Probably more than I think, just because it's such a foreign concept to me. I think it's awful. Unless it's some agreement that they have made with their husband, like they are sex workers or something.
Anonymous
Post 01/30/2024 12:16     Subject: Withholding sex
Anonymous wrote:There are two types of women who intentionally withhold sex to try to manipulate their spouse:

- those who are divorced, and those who eventually will be divorced.


I agree i didnt even realize this was a thing or why one would want to.
Anonymous
Post 01/30/2024 12:13     Subject: Withholding sex
There are two types of women who intentionally withhold sex to try to manipulate their spouse:

- those who are divorced, and those who eventually will be divorced.
Anonymous
Post 01/30/2024 12:11     Subject: Withholding sex
Dont rip me apart im just asking!!! Conversation with a bunch of moms in my group and this came up.
Some admitted they do it im just curious if anyone has heard of this or done it??