Anonymous wrote:They’re 13. No they shouldn’t be sharing a room.

This! How is this even a question. Not appropriate at that age.

Safe is a bit offensive but asking isn’t a bad idea. So try not to overthink the word. “Appropriate” would have been better but that’s probably what they mean.

One bunk room for all 4 kids might be best for mixed sexes as they get older. The more kids in the room the less it’s an issue.

Anonymous wrote:The word "safe" is a bit offensive but why hasn't it crossed your mind that a teen boy and teen girl should no longer be sharing a room? Sheesh.

Very offensive to ask if girl will be “safe,” but it’s time for them to stop sharing a room.

A word other than “safe” could have been used, like “comfortable”, but as the mom of girls I would not allow my DD to share a room with the 13 year old son of a family friend no matter how long they had been friends.

Anonymous wrote:The word "safe" is a bit offensive but why hasn't it crossed your mind that a teen boy and teen girl should no longer be sharing a room? Sheesh.

This.

I don’t find it offensive. And at that age I’d probably change the sleeping arrangements. But I think it would be fine not to as well if the kids are comfortable with it.

I’d be ok with it personally. I would check with both kids to see if they are.

Safe wasn't a good word. It should have been framed in terms of modesty or personal space. Girl may not feel comfortable changing or being in PJs with a boy no matter how nice he is. She may be self conscious about her chest or her period. Asking for separate rooms is absolutely fine.

Every year there is a conversation between the parents about whether the kids and parents are still comfortable with the situation. Either family can opt for a different sleeping arrangement at any time.

They’re 13. No they shouldn’t be sharing a room.

If I were Mom 2, I would answer, "Of course, Larla is safe sharing a bedroom with Larlo. But now that they are teens, I think we should give them the privacy of separate bedrooms."

No, it wouldn't offend me. I would not use the term "safe," but things change when kids hit puberty, and it's reasonable to start being concerned about sharing a room.

Well, she could have worded it more artfully, but I think both families would agree that this is not an ideal situation.

The word "safe" is a bit offensive but why hasn't it crossed your mind that a teen boy and teen girl should no longer be sharing a room? Sheesh.

Two families have been friends since the oldest kids were 2 or 3, they are now 13. Family 1 has a girl (13) and boy (9). Family 2 has a boy (13). The oldest kids (boy and girl) are close friends and have been since they were little. Neither has ever expressed romantic interest in the other. The families vacation for a long weekend together every year. Family 2 brings along a friend (boy) for the younger child. Families have rented a house for many years and the oldest kids have always shared a room, with separate beds. This year, mom of family 1 asks mom of family 2 if, now that the kids are teens, “is girl safe sharing a bedroom with the boy?” Boy has barely showed any interest in girls romantically and is known as a kind and respectful kid.