Anonymous wrote:What is the hurry to get married? I would not in this situation. Wait until kid is out of college

+1. Who cares? Just wait until your child knows what their aid is based on your income and if it’s irrelevant because no aid or whatever then get married. It’s a second marriage and you both around older.

Anonymous wrote:I thought the new FAFSA takes custodial and non-custodial parent income into consideration. I'm pretty sure CSS already does this, and those top private schools use CSS. So, if your ex makes decent money, his plan would already be blown, right?

But, he's right that if you marry, that income will also count. My kid has a friend w/ mom + stepdad and divorced dad, and I'm pretty sure all 3 incomes (maybe stepmom too) are entered (also all the step siblings, so they are waiting to see how they fare).

The number of kids in college no longer matters for financial aid.

I thought the new FAFSA takes custodial and non-custodial parent income into consideration. I'm pretty sure CSS already does this, and those top private schools use CSS. So, if your ex makes decent money, his plan would already be blown, right?

But, he's right that if you marry, that income will also count. My kid has a friend w/ mom + stepdad and divorced dad, and I'm pretty sure all 3 incomes (maybe stepmom too) are entered (also all the step siblings, so they are waiting to see how they fare).

I am waiting. But at my age, I hardly see this as putting our lives on hold. Not even a little. We live together, we own real estate together, I'm on his insurance as his domestic partner. I feel very secure in our future together. I'm not in a hurry to get married, we're not doing it so we can live together or so our parents approve or so we can have a baby.

The college expense is a real thing and it's an unknowable thing and it involves several parties. IOW, I agree with your ex.

I am waiting for this reason as well.

It is so stupid, honestly.

What is the hurry to get married? I would not in this situation. Wait until kid is out of college

OP here. I saw somewhere that FAFSA does not care about prenup.

Advice to your partner: We want prenup!

DH and I waited a year because we each had a kid (from a prior marriage) in college. I really don’t know if it made a financial difference, but I earned about $53k and he earned $100k at the time so we might have been okay because of those incomes. I do know that it was was alright for us because we were already three years into the relationship and felt secure.

Wow, this is literally my situation and salary and debating the same. Remaining unmarried only helps for T20 schools it seems. If DC goes to an OOS public (DC resident) it doesn’t seem to matter. My partner has significant home equity while I don’t. My kid would basically need to get into Princeton.lol I would love to hear from other custodial parents who have btdt.

Is $150k a low enough income for it to matter? I know I've seen $100k thrown around a lot as the number where expensive schools are free.

Your ex is correct. Do what’s your for your kid.

I know he’s correct about the FAFSA. What I’m grappling with is does it really matter when the more likely scenario is in-state full pay. Like is it really worth putting this part of my life on hold so my kid can maybe go to an expensive private.

Your x is correct.

I’m divorced and will be making around 150k when my kid will be applying to colleges in a couple of years. I’m in a serious relationship, thinking about marriage. My partner makes OK money but has some serious assets. My ex H wants me to remain unmarried so that my son might qualify for financial aid at an expensive private since according to him only the custodial parent has to report income so I will get a great deal. But then I would have to include my partner’s as well which would put us off the charts. Is this enough of a reason to not get married?

I’m not really excited about this expensive private my ex H wants our kid to go to (I don’t think our kid is that into it either) and think it is more likely that our kid will end up at a Virginia in-state where we will be full pay, which I’m prepared for.