Anonymous wrote:Old people should not be living in large homes they can't maintain, sell it now

Sell the house. Before you know it you will be dealing with medical crisis for your mom AND trying to fix up and sell a house that isn't local. It's both financially and mentally draining. Plus you never know how long its going to sell. A house that no one lives in still needs insurance and unoccupied home owners insurance is very very expensive as is care for a building that might have flooding or heating/cooling problems in no one is keeping a close eye on it.

Anonymous wrote:We used an unlicensed (but recommended) home care person until my mom spent for her savings. She did things like prepare food, and assist with toileting, getting dressed.

We started with an agency person, then asked that person for rec's outside the agency to make it more affordable.

we were paying $12 to $15/hr off-book for 24/7 care and that that's about $100k/yr.

We spent out the savings, and then reverse mortgage. The care was very very good (she went on for 10 years like this).

I'd suggest that you start saving now. Put away as much as you can as a savings account to supplement that $1K when it becomes needed. If its just help around the house and making meals, you need you can probably get away with someone coming in 5 days a week for 4 hours a day. That might fit the budget.

she may eventually end up in a medicaid facility. She wont have to sell her home first, but she will have to spend down all her assets and medicaid will recoup their costs with the house at some point. You can't sell ortransfer those assets.

she could do a reverse mortgage but again, there's the fear she will run out of money--then again, she could pay for home care that way and if she runs out of all her money, then try for a medicaid facility.

or a family member gives up their life.

This is the reality in america.

Old people should not be living in large homes they can't maintain, sell it now

Anonymous wrote:We used an unlicensed (but recommended) home care person until my mom spent for her savings. She did things like prepare food, and assist with toileting, getting dressed. Then Medicaid paid for a licensed person.

They do reserve the right to decide what level of care she needs/they will pay for.

Did you miss OP saying there is basically no money?

Call the area agency on aging for your mom’s state and discuss the options. There are some services available on sliding scale payment that can enable her to stay home longer. She can pay for what she can afford now, and then as she spends down she may qualify for subsidized services. It won’t keep her out of a nursing home if she needs that level of care, but potentially enough to keep her at home for a while. Explore that before you use your own money. You may need your funds later to extend the time she can remain at home when there is a gap between what is provided and what is needed to keep her safe at home.

You do what you can and then she'll have to go on long term medicaid/nursing home.

Anonymous wrote:She's very against eventually going into a nursing home, but we just don't have the money to fund a comparable level of home care once she would qualify for a nursing home (or even well before that, honestly).

Ask her what the plan is when she needs more care? She doesn't want a nursing home so... how does she think more care will be paid for?

We used an unlicensed (but recommended) home care person until my mom spent for her savings. She did things like prepare food, and assist with toileting, getting dressed. Then Medicaid paid for a licensed person.

They do reserve the right to decide what level of care she needs/they will pay for.

My mom has very little saved, is low income, and doesn't live somewhere with Medicaid waivers for home care. She's OK now but starting to go downhill, so I'm trying to plan ahead. We could cover maybe $1000 per month of in home care (maybe a couple of 4 hour shifts per week? ) but I think as she declines she'll quickly need more care. She lives in a single family home that's paid off (but isn't worth muh due to location and is kind of run down) and doesn't want to sell and move into an apartment, which could set her up for low income senior housing once the money from the home sale runs out. She's very against eventually going into a nursing home, but we just don't have the money to fund a comparable level of home care once she would qualify for a nursing home (or even well before that, honestly).