Anonymous wrote:My mom finally filed for divorce after 40 years with my dad (16-56 years old). He was verbally abusive, a drunk, had cheated multiple times, etc. She was in the lowest spot of her life. Her couch cushions were literally worn down/fraying in the outline of her body because she just laid there for a year. 2 years post divorce she went to a funeral of a woman she went to high school with, ran into her high school crush, and they've been together for 10 years now. It's almost sickening to be around them because they're like two little school kids always whispering and giggling, she sits on his lap, he always has his arm around her waist. She's extremely happy.

Anonymous wrote:I’m in my late thirties, but I have to share, because my divorce was so harrowing and my circumstances so dire for YEARS, and now my life is unimaginably good. (I used to post here prolifically about this saga.)

In 2016, at not even three months pregnant, I learned that my husband had been cheated on. I did not want to abort so I stuck around until the baby was born. I was living overseas and was incredibly isolated, depressed, and generally miserable (I already had a toddler).

Fast forward to when the baby was six months: a crew of friends essentially helped me flee the country. (I like to tell people I came to the US with two suitcases and a credit card - it’s true!). Husband immediately drained our shared account. I started working full-time right away, paying more than I was making in wages. I used the cash advance from the CC to get an apartment and a crappy used car.

I’m hopeful you’re financially set, but I was not, and it was AWFUL. I was on welfare, food stamps, etc. luckily the kids were still on their dads health insurance. But otherwise life was a grind.

The divorce was brutal, and the very isolated court system was most certainly corrupt. I was humiliated in court when my ex husband claimed our marriage was a farce and he never really “meant” to marry me (?). I was compelled to give him custody of the kids, which is the greatest pain of my life and which is still resolving itself.

I’ll fast forward to now, over six years later: I got an advanced degree, started my professional career, got remarried, bought a home, and have a standard of living much greater than I’ve ever had before. Ex-husband and I are finally on friendly terms, and are relocating to the same city next year so we can share custody. Thank God!

Note that this process was delayed and compounded by the pandemic. Hell on hell.

I cannot overstate how difficult it was, but I ALSO cannot overstate the freedom and peace on the other side of this. You will get through this better than ever. Take extremely good care of yourself and surround yourself with supportive, loving people. Bless you OP.

Anonymous wrote:I’m in my late thirties, but I have to share, because my divorce was so harrowing and my circumstances so dire for YEARS, and now my life is unimaginably good. (I used to post here prolifically about this saga.)

In 2016, at not even three months pregnant, I learned that my husband had been cheated on. I did not want to abort so I stuck around until the baby was born. I was living overseas and was incredibly isolated, depressed, and generally miserable (I already had a toddler).

Fast forward to when the baby was six months: a crew of friends essentially helped me flee the country. (I like to tell people I came to the US with two suitcases and a credit card - it’s true!). Husband immediately drained our shared account. I started working full-time right away, paying more than I was making in wages. I used the cash advance from the CC to get an apartment and a crappy used car.

I’m hopeful you’re financially set, but I was not, and it was AWFUL. I was on welfare, food stamps, etc. luckily the kids were still on their dads health insurance. But otherwise life was a grind.

The divorce was brutal, and the very isolated court system was most certainly corrupt. I was humiliated in court when my ex husband claimed our marriage was a farce and he never really “meant” to marry me (?). I was compelled to give him custody of the kids, which is the greatest pain of my life and which is still resolving itself.

I’ll fast forward to now, over six years later: I got an advanced degree, started my professional career, got remarried, bought a home, and have a standard of living much greater than I’ve ever had before. Ex-husband and I are finally on friendly terms, and are relocating to the same city next year so we can share custody. Thank God!

Note that this process was delayed and compounded by the pandemic. Hell on hell.

I cannot overstate how difficult it was, but I ALSO cannot overstate the freedom and peace on the other side of this. You will get through this better than ever. Take extremely good care of yourself and surround yourself with supportive, loving people. Bless you OP.

Anonymous wrote:My friend. It was a nightmare kind of bad divorce. She is happily remarried now and just had a healthy baby at 44 (not her first child).

OP, I've heard numerous happy ending post-divorce stories. I wish you luck and courage!