He doesn't have a thing in Kindergarten?!?








Well, there goes Harvard, OP. You've got a dud on your hands.

Anonymous wrote:My kid started rec soccer in first grade.

That group became the foundation for her friendships and social circles. The team stayed pretty consistent throughout elementary school. They also got pretty good! It was fun to move up to the next level together at the end of elementary.

I did notice that others who tried to join the team later in elementary often quit because it was hard to catch up. Nobody was mean, but I think the new kids quickly realized they couldn’t keep up and didn’t enjoy it. I’ve heard of this happening in baseball too. So, there is a really big element of learning skills, which as a non-athletic person, I was surprised to see at such young ages.

I'm slightly bummed out about this as a non sports person. I feel pressure to have DS sign up for so many sports, just in case its something he wants to pursue. He's done tennis, football, soccer, and is starting basketball. I would rather he relax and/or pursue cool academic stuff like science labs or kids robotics or something, which I think he would love. But there isn't enough time in the day for both. I'm shocked at age 5 that sports require 2-3 hours a week.

I'm going to disagree with some of the consensus here.

First, I think doing activities in kindergarten or even younger can be great. I have an only child, and we started enrolling her in activities at 4 in order to encourage more socialization. We looked for things that were age appropriate and that played to existing interests. She likes music and dancing, so we put her in preschool level dance and gymnastics classes, and took her to music and movement classes at the local library. She loved all of these, but especially ballet.

In K we also added soccer at her request (a lot of classmates in K were doing soccer). But it turned out she didn't really like it, so we only did it once. She's also done basketball through an after school program but she didn't like that either. We won't ever discourage team sports, but we are getting the sense that at least at this age, it doesn't really suit her.

We made her take swim lessons because that's a fundamental skill. And for a long time she hated it but we made her go because we want her to be at least competent in the water. And then she got competent in the water and discovered, actually, she loves swimming. At least for now

So now she's in first and just doing ballet and swim. Recently she told me she loves science and asked there are any "science camps" in the summer. So I'm looking to see if there's a STEM camp for her age group for next summer.

I don't know if ballet or swim or science will be her "thing" or just passing interests. We are totally fine either way. I think some kids latch onto activities early and never lose interest, and others don't, and I don't think either one is right or wrong. Developing an early interest like that has some advantages, as others have noted regarding sports that kind of close off to kids who don't start them early enough. But if she winds up doing ballet 5 days a week in high school, that could also prevent her from exploring other passions, or just being a kid. So there are tradeoffs.

But I don't think here is anything wrong with signing your kindergartener up activities and, if there's anything they latch on to, encouraging that interest. Whether it becomes their thing or not, they will learn something and make friends. Good enough.

My kid started rec soccer in first grade.

That group became the foundation for her friendships and social circles. The team stayed pretty consistent throughout elementary school. They also got pretty good! It was fun to move up to the next level together at the end of elementary.

I did notice that others who tried to join the team later in elementary often quit because it was hard to catch up. Nobody was mean, but I think the new kids quickly realized they couldn’t keep up and didn’t enjoy it. I’ve heard of this happening in baseball too. So, there is a really big element of learning skills, which as a non-athletic person, I was surprised to see at such young ages.

Please don't sweat this in kindergarten. I have two kids with "things" and I just exposed them to different activities along the way. In Kindergarten we had no idea what would stick.

My 8th grader doesn't have a "thing." He really enjoys two sports and an instrument, but none of them are his thing. My 6th grader tried all kinds of sports, dance, instrument, theater, etc. Her thing is definitely her primary sport. She started in 1st grade but I would not say we knew it was her thing until 4th grade.

My kid tried lots of things all the way thru HS. Never got “national level awards” whatever the hell that means but found some things he liked and is off at a very good college fwiw.

Anonymous wrote:At kindergarten level, just try to enjoy the moments of childhood. They don’t need to be signed up for anything. The feeling in this area that kids need to be spending hours each week in extracurricular activities is not healthy. It’s hard to not get caught up in it.

Many kids just dabble in different activities and interests as they grow, and that’s fine. In college is when they pick a major.

Just look for a balance in life and let them play now.

At that age I really wanted socialization since DS is an only child. I signed him up for after school care even though we didn't need it, just so he could have extra time to play with kids.

LOL... Kindergarten!?

Have them try lots of different things. There isn't always one, and it can change at an older age than you think.

But to answer your question, my DD is in 7th grade. Her "thing" is musical theatre and she found it in 4th grade.

My DS is a little more all over the place in terms of his interests and abilities, but the activity he seems to really have taken to is piano, which he started in 2nd grade. He's in 4th now.

During kindergarten (and in 1st grade this year), he's still trying new things. He's tried chess, football, rec soccer, language, musical instrument, choir, and math.

The only things we've stuck with are language and musical instrument, and those will hopefully continue for years. I do think it's crazy that at this age, many parents seem to have picked sports as their kid's thing, but to some extent I guess it is necessary? We got shut out of a sport in 1st grade because we didn't join during peewee age. Another parent told me that her kid got shut out of another sport because the kids were way too good by end of elementary. So if you don't get in early, either tight knit teams have already formed, or kids have already built up their skills and you can't join as a beginner anymore.

My freshman in high school just started a new thing - crew team in HS. I think the important thing is to teach kids to get involved and try things.

Kindergarten? Goodness, your 5 year old doesn’t need a thing.

Most people don’t have a “thing” …

At kindergarten level, just try to enjoy the moments of childhood. They don’t need to be signed up for anything. The feeling in this area that kids need to be spending hours each week in extracurricular activities is not healthy. It’s hard to not get caught up in it.

Many kids just dabble in different activities and interests as they grow, and that’s fine. In college is when they pick a major.

Just look for a balance in life and let them play now.

Was it something they asked to try or something you suggested? Did you have them try a bunch of activities and see which one(s) stuck?

My oldest is in K this year so I'm starting to wonder about this.