Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My work colleague did - requested a transfer to a new office my firm was opening in Chicago. To make this happen she divorced her abusive husband and left her three troubled teenage sons on the East Coast. Moved to Chicago with only her clothes and a bed in her early 40s - a few years later she met and married the love of her life, and almost 30 years later, they are still married and very much in love.

But she abandoned her kids, and left them with their abusive dad. That’s disgraceful. She sucks.

Gee wonder why they’re troubled teens?!

Anonymous wrote:My work colleague did - requested a transfer to a new office my firm was opening in Chicago. To make this happen she divorced her abusive husband and left her three troubled teenage sons on the East Coast. Moved to Chicago with only her clothes and a bed in her early 40s - a few years later she met and married the love of her life, and almost 30 years later, they are still married and very much in love.

She abandoned her kids?

Anonymous wrote:My work colleague did - requested a transfer to a new office my firm was opening in Chicago. To make this happen she divorced her abusive husband and left her three troubled teenage sons on the East Coast. Moved to Chicago with only her clothes and a bed in her early 40s - a few years later she met and married the love of her life, and almost 30 years later, they are still married and very much in love.

But she abandoned her kids, and left them with their abusive dad. That’s disgraceful. She sucks.

Yes. Me! I got divorced and went back to my birth country after 25 years living in MD. I don’t regret my decision and I am extremely happy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I want to do this, but take my DH and kid with me. I just want to start over somewhere new. I hate where I live and the people I live around, and I think the stress of being here is literally making me sick.

Where do you live? Do you have friends elsewhere?

I live in the DMV. I have friends elsewhere but we can't leave for work reasons. Maybe in a few years.

I would love to but have no idea how to start. It feels very overwhelming but my life here is miserable and I feel so hopeless.

Anonymous wrote:I want to do this, but take my DH and kid with me. I just want to start over somewhere new. I hate where I live and the people I live around, and I think the stress of being here is literally making me sick.

Where do you live? Do you have friends elsewhere?

Yes although I was content in my old life.

During the pandemic we did an extended stay across the country and then DH had what I consider a midlife crisis after we'd established residency in the new state. He forced me to quit my job (no childcare during COVID) and then I separated from him so had to start over in a new place.

We had kids ranging from preschool to elementary at the time. I got a similar job but in a completely different industry. I had to start making all new friends. I started dating and now have a new boyfriend. He now has a new partner and is cohabiting with additional children.

Since we coparent I will never be fully removed from his life but my life is pretty unrecognizable.

One of my childhood friends did this a few times: moved to a completely different place without a plan or knowing anybody and worked odd jobs (think: waitress in random beach town on an island).

Another friend has bounced around from jobs/careers and multiple stints in school. Nearly 50 and probably on her fourth reinvention after a string of family tragedies and two failed marriages. She is definitely the type who needs a new location and new purpose whenever depression sinks in every few years or so. I think she’s on the 12th city since I’ve met her as a young adult.

My work colleague did - requested a transfer to a new office my firm was opening in Chicago. To make this happen she divorced her abusive husband and left her three troubled teenage sons on the East Coast. Moved to Chicago with only her clothes and a bed in her early 40s - a few years later she met and married the love of her life, and almost 30 years later, they are still married and very much in love.

I want to do this, but take my DH and kid with me. I just want to start over somewhere new. I hate where I live and the people I live around, and I think the stress of being here is literally making me sick.

I'd love to.

Yes. I moved across the country, changed careers (I went to school at night for a degree in a new field while working in the old one), and legally changed my name. I needed to get away from where I grew up and those people and the associations with all of it. I don't mind running into some people I used to know and just tell them "Actually I go by my confirmation name, Kristin now" and that's that. But it's only happened twice in over 20 years.

I plan to when I retire.

If so, how did it turn out for you? What spurred the change?