Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Try mediation if possible. And use it as leverage because the best deal if he could would be through mediation. And also both you will walk away with more money. I used a divorce lawyer for a contested divorce and my savings went from $95k to 5k and my wives from 95k to 13k. And we both came out worse off….

True, but I spent $50k trying to reach a settlement plus $20k on failed mediation and still had to litigate ($100k). If you have a truly unreasonable spouse, it might be better to go straight to litigation.

+1.

Anonymous wrote:Try mediation if possible. And use it as leverage because the best deal if he could would be through mediation. And also both you will walk away with more money. I used a divorce lawyer for a contested divorce and my savings went from $95k to 5k and my wives from 95k to 13k. And we both came out worse off….

True, but I spent $50k trying to reach a settlement plus $20k on failed mediation and still had to litigate ($100k). If you have a truly unreasonable spouse, it might be better to go straight to litigation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Northern Virginia, Fairfax County.

He will definitely still try to use the kids as leverage. Probably by withholding college funding and/or painting me as the bad guy. I’ve done everything I could do to protect them though and now I need out.

It sounds like you are the bad guy.

Troll. Ignore.

Eh... bailing on marriage and strategizing how to get money from your financially successful spouse...

Anonymous wrote:Try mediation if possible. And use it as leverage because the best deal if he could would be through mediation. And also both you will walk away with more money. I used a divorce lawyer for a contested divorce and my savings went from $95k to 5k and my wives from 95k to 13k. And we both came out worse off….

Dude, how many wives did you have?

Try mediation if possible. And use it as leverage because the best deal if he could would be through mediation. And also both you will walk away with more money. I used a divorce lawyer for a contested divorce and my savings went from $95k to 5k and my wives from 95k to 13k. And we both came out worse off….

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Northern Virginia, Fairfax County.

He will definitely still try to use the kids as leverage. Probably by withholding college funding and/or painting me as the bad guy. I’ve done everything I could do to protect them though and now I need out.

Rachel Virk.

Just so you know, college payments it not really something that gets negotiated in a divorce decree.

It can be negotiated voluntarily - it’s in mine. You can create a binding financial agreement for anything. Eg OP may agree to give up something in return for funding a 529. There should also be an agreement for both parents to participate in the financial aide process and file the paperwork.

Anonymous wrote:Northern Virginia, Fairfax County.

He will definitely still try to use the kids as leverage. Probably by withholding college funding and/or painting me as the bad guy. I’ve done everything I could do to protect them though and now I need out.

Rachel Virk.

Just so you know, college payments it not really something that gets negotiated in a divorce decree.

Christian Latham at Bean Kinney Korman

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Northern Virginia, Fairfax County.

He will definitely still try to use the kids as leverage. Probably by withholding college funding and/or painting me as the bad guy. I’ve done everything I could do to protect them though and now I need out.

It sounds like you are the bad guy.

Troll. Ignore.

Anonymous wrote:Northern Virginia, Fairfax County.

He will definitely still try to use the kids as leverage. Probably by withholding college funding and/or painting me as the bad guy. I’ve done everything I could do to protect them though and now I need out.

It sounds like you are the bad guy.

Illona Grenader at vafamilylaw.com

She was hired by a friend of mine and seems to have done a great job for her during contentious custody and financial issues.

Northern Virginia, Fairfax County.

He will definitely still try to use the kids as leverage. Probably by withholding college funding and/or painting me as the bad guy. I’ve done everything I could do to protect them though and now I need out.

What jurisdiction?

Also, beware that just because your child has reached age 18 doesn't mean this will be any easier from a kid-related standpoint (even though there might not be any child support to worry about).

If no kids are involved what is there to be in conflict over? Assets?

You may just need a forensic accountant to make sure nothing is hidden, but otherwise I think the law is pretty straightforward on this unless you have very complicated stuff like a business to split.

I’ve been sticking it out for years waiting for the kids to graduate hs so they wouldn’t be used as pawns. My youngest will be done in a year and I need to find a lawyer to help me strategize my exit.

Someone experienced with professionally successful narcissistic spouses that are charming to others but abusive at home is ideal. Thank you.