Anonymous wrote:I’m of the minority that believes someone trying to keep you from getting sleep is abusive. I wouldn’t worry one second about your husband’s beliefs. YOU need sleep. Period. He can suck it up.

No I think that’s a majority view…

I’m of the minority that believes someone trying to keep you from getting sleep is abusive. I wouldn’t worry one second about your husband’s beliefs. YOU need sleep. Period. He can suck it up.

If we had a 3rd bedroom I’d be there in a heartbeat! DH has RLS, wears a CPAP and goes to bed really late. Some nights I go to my kid’s room to sleep in the 2nd twin bed.

We've slept apart for 10+ years. He still snores and I still toss and turn, but it's light-years better than before. Sex isn't amazing because I struggle with depression, but I don't understand the concerns there. You've got two beds instead of one...

I've had my own room for over 20 years on the opposite side of the house for many reasons. We each have our own full baths too. He keeps his space clean. I keep my space clean.
There is no law stating married/living together couples HAVE to share a room or a bed. My sleep and comfort is just as important as my husband's and he understands that. Matter of fact he was asking me earlier if I wanted an adjustable bed for my room. I thought God I am lucky to have such a caring husband.
As far as the kids go, they knew why but really it's not their business. I love my room. I love being in my room. I enjoy falling asleep watching old movies. I don't disturb my husband and he doesn't disturb me. The doors are always open. He has his cat, I have mine. LOL.
I never understood why separate rooms would cause a conflict. Sounds like a control issue. Like being forced to watch something on tv you don't want to watch.

Sleeping in separate rooms was ok but eventually not great for our marriage but sleep is absolutely #1. If you cannot come to a compromise about sleeping arrangements so that everyone can sleep, then you HAVE to sleep separately! Think of how many people need to use a CPAP machine… their spouses should not HAVE to sleep in the same room with that.

Anonymous wrote:My boss and his wife sleep in separate rooms. If it works it works. Sleep is too important to let silly rules get in the way imo.

This. A chronically sleep deprived spouse will not make a better marriage.

We've been sleeping in separate rooms for about 15 years and it works for us. Sleep is so important to your health. One of us is a light sleeper who likes the room dark and quiet, the other a night owl who likes to fall asleep to the tv and snores. One of us was always getting a bad night's sleep when we shared a room. Sex is still good and regular. You don't need to sleep in the same bed for that.

My boss and his wife sleep in separate rooms. If it works it works. Sleep is too important to let silly rules get in the way imo.

Separate bedrooms for 15 years. My boyfriend rolls around and bounces around when he sleeps. He also kicks when he sleeps. I knew early on we could not sleep together.

Exceptionally happy together. Sex is good.

We cuddle/talk/sex at night and in the morning. Sleep is in separate bedroom. There is no other option for me. I am an extremely light sleeper and he is loud and moves around a lot. If we didn’t do this, then the marriage would be over.

Man here. Sleeping in a different room sometimes is fine, but moving into a different room would mean one foot in the grave to me. I use ear plugs and an eye mask because my wife likes to watch tv to fall asleep.

Been sleeping in separate rooms for the past 17 years. I am incredibly happy, sex is incredible, my DH is great, we both can spread out and set up our rooms exactly as we want it to be. We are happier people. I have adult kids in our home and we have not tried to hide the fact that we sleep in separate rooms. We spend a lot of time with each other when we are awake.

No suggestions if he won’t agree. This is why I know I’ll never remarry. I just can’t share a bed or a bedroom with anyone. And I assume most men would not be on board with that. However, I need my sleep.

I am very tired. I do not want to sleep with my husband anymore as that makes it a lot worse, this will hopefully be temporary. There is no good solution other than to remove what is making me tired or to remove myself from the room. He thinks if I don't sleep with him, then the marriage is on its way to being over. Can any happy couples who don't sleep together chime in?