Anonymous wrote:My friends had Indian ladies who liked this setup. The aunties lived with their children permanently. This allowed them to have some income and their kids had their space. They typically did this once their own grandchildren were past the nanny stage.

So these nannies were quite old?

My niece did this for awhile (not in the DC or NYC area). Basically on the weekends she stayed with her boyfriend who had his own apt, no roommates. Because she only stayed 2 days a week, it did not violate his lease terms regarding guests. She would hang out there a couple nights a week after work but sleep at her nanny's house.

I think she did it a little over a year and ended things on good terms with the family. She just matured out of the arrangement.

For the appropriate price, you can find anything with a little “know-how”.

My friends had Indian ladies who liked this setup. The aunties lived with their children permanently. This allowed them to have some income and their kids had their space. They typically did this once their own grandchildren were past the nanny stage.

No one wants this. If you have a private space for the nanny to live in during the week, what difference does it make if she's there on the weekend as well? Or do you plan to treat her like a guest during the week? You're having trouble finding someone because it's a crappy set up for the nanny. All the worst parts of living with your employer and none of the benefits.

The only way you might find this is if you offered to pay for the place she'll inevitably have to rent but only use on the weekends. You'd be better off deciding if you actually want a live-in nanny and not trying to have it both ways.

You need to advertise for live-in nanny and see what is out there.

You have to find someone who wants this situation. For example an older woman living with her children who want to give them some privacy but goes back on the weekends to spend time. There are people willing to do this, you just have to find them.

From a nanny's point of view, this seems like the worst of both worlds. She'll have to pay for an apartment and everything that comes with that (utility bills, furniture, etc.) but won't even be able to go home to it each night.
I bet there are many little inconveniences that could add up to bigger frustration:
-not being able to pick up your mail each day
-More limited in when you can schedule deliveries/repairs
-perishable food spoilage
-not being able to keep plants/pets

What would be your reason for wanting this set up? I think you'd have to pay a huge premium.

In my former life, I did this. I didn’t enjoy the commute and the family offered me comfortable, separate quarters. Key thing is, I never offered discounts to live-in.

We had someone do this but she requested it. She had her own place but it was a long commute so she preferred to stay over on weekdays. I think she was probably living with family or roommates at the other place so it wasn’t like she was paying for it all herself.

Where would they go Friday-Sunday? I can't believe you are even considering this set-up! It seems really mean. Either have them with you or not.

Anonymous wrote:Has anyone been successful in hiring a live in nanny who lives in M-F? A number of our friends in Ny have this set up but we’ve been having a hard time figuring out how to find this in DC. Thanks in advance!

Because it doesn’t exist. Who would want to do that? Maybe you should move to NYC to get this set-up.

Maybe someone who still lives with their parents. Otherwise who would want to do this?

Anonymous wrote:Has anyone been successful in hiring a live in nanny who lives in M-F? A number of our friends in Ny have this set up but we’ve been having a hard time figuring out how to find this in DC. Thanks in advance!

I can't think of what nanny this would appeal to- they would basically have to pay rent on a place for the whole month but live out of a suitcase during the week so they don't get the benefit of free rent.

Has anyone been successful in hiring a live in nanny who lives in M-F? A number of our friends in Ny have this set up but we’ve been having a hard time figuring out how to find this in DC. Thanks in advance!