My version of a hopeful story: severe DOR, AMH levels were undetectable. Ended up naturally pregnant while waiting for a donor egg and had a healthy DD (after multiple miscarriages) and then a few years later had a healthy DS after one cycle of IUI.

I can't claim anything about relaxing, not relaxing, diet, etc, but wanted to throw out there that sometimes "a diagnosis" doesn't drive an outcome. There are absolutely situations where a pregnancy would be impossible, I know that. But there are a lot of shades of grey of infertility that may feel hopeless upon diagnosis.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Congratulations, OP! Wonderful news!

I think the point is to not give up hope. Keep trying.

No. Sometimes you need to give up hope and stop trying to be able to find peace and move on with your life. A one in a million miracle is just that. Prolonging false hope just keeps women bogged down in infertility trauma.

Agreed.

Anonymous wrote:Happy for you OP but I really hate these stories where the punchline is 'stop trying so hard and it will just happen'. It is just not the reality for most people and promotes a negative and damaging narrative.

If only we all could just relax right,

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Congratulations, OP! Wonderful news!

I think the point is to not give up hope. Keep trying.

No. Sometimes you need to give up hope and stop trying to be able to find peace and move on with your life. A one in a million miracle is just that. Prolonging false hope just keeps women bogged down in infertility trauma.

This

Anonymous wrote:Congratulations, OP! Wonderful news!

I think the point is to not give up hope. Keep trying.

No. Sometimes you need to give up hope and stop trying to be able to find peace and move on with your life. A one in a million miracle is just that. Prolonging false hope just keeps women bogged down in infertility trauma.

Congratulations, OP! Wonderful news!

I think the point is to not give up hope. Keep trying.

Happy for you OP but I really hate these stories where the punchline is 'stop trying so hard and it will just happen'. It is just not the reality for most people and promotes a negative and damaging narrative.

Do not tell people this. I had a similar situation to OP except I had five miscarriages after stopping treatment instead of a miracle baby. Sometimes that faith and patience in the long game doesn’t lead to a happy ending.

Congrats OP! So happy for you and family.

Incredible, OP. I tell everyone struggling with fertility (who asks) that it’s a numbers game. And a very, very long game for some.

Do you happen to have pcos? It’s a horrible condition but one of the perks for me and the women in my family has been spontaneous pregnancies in our 40s!

When I was in the thick of it it was really helpful for me to read stories that gave me hope, no matter how dissimilar their situation was to mine. So just offering this up for anyone who needs it today..

We had unexplained infertility for 7 years. When I finally got pregnant through iui in 2017 (at 37) it was after a myomectomy (which left me with a uterine puncture meaning I could not have a vaginal birth ever), many timed cycles, and probably 6 or so failed iui cycles. I finally got pregnant the throw-away cycle we ‘took off’ (meaning I stopped being so diligent about what I ate and drank and gave up on acupuncture, etc) before we were planning to move to IVF. He just turned 5.

We tried for a second for years after with no success. Sometime during that process we learned both of my tubes were blocked (scar tissue from either the myo or the c-section). I had a procedure to unblock them. I had an endometrial biopsy. I did multiple rounds of iui. Last year we gave in and tried IVF. My numbers have always been decent but I was 42. We only got 5 eggs—4 fertilized, one made it to day 5. We had it tested. It was abnormal. We were devastated. At 42, and years of treatment that hadn’t worked, I was told to move on to donor eggs.

After many tears and sleepless nights we decided to throw in the towel. I stopped everything that I’d been doing for years, all the supplements, the massages, the acupuncture, the obsessive ovulation tracking. In January I finally talked to my pcp about my years of anxiety—something I hadn’t dealt with and didn’t want to start taking meds for before because what if I was pregnant the next month?! Well I never was so…it was time. I turned 43. The meds were working, I was happier than I’d been in years…

In early March it dawned on me I should have gotten a period. I was convinced I was probably in early menopause. I waited a few more days. Then I took a pregnancy test (3 actually). It was positive. My husband thought I was pranking him. SGF asked me to come in for a beta. It was 30,000… the ultrasound the next day confirmed it. I was happy but also…at 43 what if something was wrong. I skipped the NIPT (I had a false positive for downs during my first pregnancy which of course they say never happens), and went straight to CVS. We got the news this week that everything is fine. A perfectly healthy spontaneous pregnancy at 43 after years of heartbreak and failed cycles. I can hardly believe it.

Thinking of everyone in the thick of it (and even those who have given up along the way) today because I know how frustrating and heartbreaking this all is. But sometimes…just sometimes, it works out when you least expect it..